


Live Through This And You Won't Look Back

by bubbleguchi



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Drinking, First Meetings, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Mutual Pining, POV Multiple, Slow Burn, Texting, University AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-30
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:54:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 24
Words: 45,417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27280780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bubbleguchi/pseuds/bubbleguchi
Summary: Kei is lonely and awkward, hoping that maybe starting university will help him change that. Tadashi is ready to be bold and make his first year at university one to remember. And Shouyou and Tobio – well, they're bickering idiots, but what's new?-x-A University AU(Title from 'Your Ex-Lover is Dead' by Stars)
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio, Tsukishima Kei/Yamaguchi Tadashi
Comments: 237
Kudos: 248





	1. Chapter 1

So far, Kei would say that university  _ sucks _ . Perhaps some would claim that this is a snap judgment on his part, seeing as he has only been here for three weeks, but he stands by it. There is, as of yet, not a single thing that has lived up to the whole university hype for him. Firstly, Kei’s roommate is the most hyper-active, loud,  _ annoying _ creature he has ever met. Secondly, his course is painfully boring, mainly consisting of things he already knows. And thirdly, he has yet to make a single friend.

Outwardly, Kei is unbothered by this; his aloof and stoic demeanour paints him as someone who thrives in solitude. However, deep down, Kei had been hoping that this change of scenery would bring about some kind of personal change, too. He wants more than he’s had before. He wants to find his place, somewhere he can belong. He didn’t find it in middle school, nor high school, and by now he’s feeling desperate.

Not quite desperate enough to befriend his roommate just yet, though. But ask him again in a month or so. Who knows.

Even through his headphones, Kei can hear said roommate rooting about their room, obnoxiously loud as always. He pulls one headphone away from his ear.

“Hinata, what could you  _ possibly _ be doing that warrants so much noise?” he asks, exasperated. Kei watches from where he’s reclined on his bed, book in hand, as Hinata’s head pops up from where he was digging under his bed, a pout on his face.

“I can’t find my anatomy textbook!” he all but wails, gripping his orange hair with his fists. “Tsukishima, have you seen it?”

Kei surveys the room; while his own side is acceptably neat, Hinata’s is strewn with clothes, papers, books, some food wrappers. Wrinkling his nose, Kei moves to replace his headphone.

“No. Maybe if you cleaned once in a while, you wouldn’t lose everything.” He drops the headphone back onto his ear, drowning out Hinata’s noise as best he can, before turning back to his book. “Now be more quiet while you look, please.”

His headphones don’t quite drown out Hinata’s annoyed huff. Kei turns his volume up a couple times for good measure. If he ever gets desperate enough to even  _ think _ of befriending Hinata he thinks he should probably just give up all together. There will be no hope left at that point.

Hinata continues to rummage around for a few minutes longer before flopping onto his bed in defeat, a prolonged groan escaping his mouth. Kei takes a moment to feel sorry for himself. Why, oh stars,  _ why _ couldn’t he have been placed with a  _ quiet  _ roommate? Before he gets a chance to voice this thought, a banging at their door causes them both to sit up, alert.

“Come in!” shouts Hinata. Kei scowls at him, annoyed at the idea of having one of Hinata’s friends in his room, because of course it has to be one of Hinata’s friends, thanks to Kei’s aforementioned lack thereof.

The door swings inwards to reveal Tanaka, and Kei realises he was only half right. He reluctantly pulls his headphones from his ears, preparing for the inevitable onslaught.

“Tanaka!” Hinata calls gleefully, and Tanaka grins back, fists on his hips as if he’s a superhero. Rolling his eyes, Kei tries to make himself invisible, sinking into his bed and bringing his shoulders up around his ears.

“Hey, little dude!” Tanaka replies, strutting over to ruffle Hinata’s hair and getting some giggly protests in return. Then his eyes fall onto Kei. “Just the man I wanted to see,” he grins, and Kei cringes. This can’t be good news.

“I’m sorry to say that the feeling isn’t mutual,” he snarks back as Tanaka launches himself onto Kei’s bed, narrowly avoiding Kei’s outstretched legs. Kei kicks him halfheartedly, but Tanaka is undeterred, settling himself into a comfortable position.

“Don’t lie, lil’ Shima, you love me,” Tanaka taunts, earning himself another kick from Kei. Tanaka ignores him. “Party. Tomorrow.  _ You’re _ coming with me.”

“I think you have me confused with someone who likes you,” Kei deadpans back.

“I’ll go with you, Tanaka!” calls Hinata from where he sits on his own bed. Tanaka turns to him.

“No doubt, Shouyou!” he beams. “But we gotta bring Kei. My sister won’t forgive me if I let her boyfriend’s little bro waste all of his time here  _ studying _ .” He laughs at his own joke, and Hinata laughs along, the combined sound grating on Kei’s nerves.

“Your  _ sister _ couldn’t give two shits how I spend my time,” Kei huffs, “ _ you _ just like using her as an excuse to ruin my life.”

“Not true!” Tanaka claims, voice high with outrage. “Not true at all! Before you came here she said to me ‘Ryu, Akiteru is worried about Kei. Look after him and make sure he makes some friends.’ And I can’t let my sis down!” Kei rolls his eyes impossibly hard at Tanaka’s account of the supposed conversation, but he can’t help but wonder if some semblance of it did actually happen. Knowing Saeko, it probably did. Kei groans.

“Fine, I’ll come,” he concedes, but before Tanaka can celebrate his victory, he adds an emphasised “ _ but. _ ” Tanaka meets his eye. “I don’t want you hanging around me all night, or trying to introduce me to people, or telling people we’re  _ brothers _ .” Tanaka starts to protest at this, but Kei holds up a finger to silence him. “Do you agree to these terms?”

Tanaka grumbles out a “fine”, and Kei puffs out a relieved sigh. Satisfied at having accomplished his task, Tanaka moves from Kei’s bed to talk enthusiastically with Hinata about whatever annoying people talk about. Kei slips his headphones back over his ears and thinks about what he’s gotten himself into. Only tomorrow will tell.

-x-

Fridays are a good day for Kei. He has no classes but one from 8am to 10am, after which he is free for the weekend. Many of his fellow students would probably be less than impressed to be forced into such an early class, but Kei has always been an early riser and enjoys the excuse to get out of the dorm. Instead of returning to his room after class, he usually spends a good chunk of his free time in the library. Sure, his studies are important to him, but the main appeal of the library is that one can almost guarantee that it will be a Hinata-free zone.

Kei makes his way through the library to a spot at the back. This seat is almost always empty, so Kei has all but claimed it as his own, happy to be away from the groups who sit together and mess around under the guise of ‘studying’. It’s not that he’s uptight – though Tanaka may dispute this claim, – it’s that he can’t stand the jealousy that rises in his chest when he sees the effortlessness with which others seem to interact with each other. It makes him feel inadequate. If it’s so easy for everyone else, why isn’t it for him?

Sighing, he tries to return his focus to the notes in front of him. Classics may be boring, but they’re better than self-pity. As he mindlessly scans his neat writing, his mind wanders to the party that Tanaka’s convinced him to go to. It’s tonight, and Kei already feels the threatening bubble of anxiety in his stomach. While he didn’t want Tanaka trailing him all night, he now finds himself terrified that he won’t know anyone else there.

It is undeniably clear that Kei is not a people person. He’s blunt, and sarcastic, and he has a low tolerance for the loud and the boisterous, though it seems the loud and the boisterous is all he will ever know. Akiteru was always friendly and easy-going, and had no problem making friends. Kei wouldn’t describe his brother as particularly rowdy, but he could have his moments.

Then there were the Tanakas. Kei does resent Akiteru for shoe-horning that pair into his life. Although, to be fair, Kei does like Saeko. She and Akiteru started dating in high school, back when Kei still idolised his brother, so he had by extension idolised Saeko. Even when he grew older and jaded, Kei still had a soft spot for Saeko and how she had always treated him like family. Ryuunosuke, on the other hand, has always been too much for Kei. But even he had no problem making friends, it seemed.

Kei had hoped that moving away for university would mark a change in his life. He imagined meeting his roommate and just  _ clicking _ , finding so much in common with another person for the first time ever. He pictured someone who didn’t mind that he’s not very expressive, someone who liked his dry wit, who was tidy and understanding and who liked the same kind of music. Instead he got Hinata.

And now he wonders if he’ll ever find that connection, or if this will be just like school, and he’ll be left alone once more. He really hopes not. Maybe this party will be good for him. Maybe all Kei needs is to be thrown into the deep end. Plus, a drink or two couldn’t hurt his chances.

So it’s decided; tonight, Kei will make a friend. It can’t be  _ that _ difficult, right?


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So seeing as this AU is gonna be based on UK universities I just wanna clear up some terms in case they're unfamiliar to international readers :-)
> 
> Freshers - First years, but we don’t use similar terms for other years, just 2nd or 3rd years and so on.
> 
> Societies - Groups run by students, can be anything from sport to hobby based, usually include a subscription that entitles you to special access to things such as equipment or events.
> 
> Socials - Literally just social events run by societies, usually parties, pub-crawls, or club nights out.
> 
> ALSO there will be drinking and most of the characters are under 21. This isn't underage drinking in the UK where the legal age is 18.

Before he left for university, Tadashi made himself one promise; do  _ everything _ . Take every single opportunity to have every single experience. Always say  _ yes _ . Because the things we regret the most are the things we don’t do, and Tadashi has more than enough of those regrets as is.

This is his chance. He’s moving away from home, away from anyone who knew the old him. It’s time to become the new him. The Tadashi that isn’t afraid to take risks, to get messy, to make mistakes. Up to now, he’s always been too nervous, too worried about what people will say if he fails. Not any more. He’s ready to fuck up, and have fun doing it.

He’s kept to his promise so far, and is very pleased with the results. His proudest achievement is the friends he’s made. Sure, Tadashi had friends in high school, but they weren’t all that close. He’s not even spoken to any of them in the three weeks he’s been here. Not that he minds all that much; new Tadashi has no room in his life for remnants from his time as old Tadashi. And to be fair, those remnants don’t seem bothered enough to try contacting him. So he’s made new friends.

His favourite is Yachi, a girl he met in his first graphic design class. She was nervous and jumpy, and he was flustered, but once they got to work the nerves fell away and they found they had a lot in common. Tadashi was incredibly grateful for this, as it was a well needed boost after the ordeal of meeting his roommate.

Make no mistake, he has  _ nothing _ against Kageyama; he’s a nice enough guy. He’s just maybe not the kind of guy Tadashi imagined he’d be living with. But he’s definitely not a bad roommate! Just a little odd. Which is fine.

Then there’s Azumane, a third year student who Tadashi met at the society’s fair in Freshers’ Week. Azumane is the president of the Digital Arts Society, and Tadashi’s ‘say yes’ attitude lead him to join. He really likes Azumane; he’s kind and soft-spoken despite his gruff exterior, and Tadashi has a lot of respect for all the work he does to make people feel included in the society.

They’re just finishing a DAS meeting when Azumane approaches Tadashi where he stands with Yachi. Tadashi greets him brightly.

“Yamaguchi, you had some really good ideas for the next social,” Azumane says with a smile. Tadashi beams back proudly.

“Thanks! I think it’ll be a good way to get to know each other better.”

Azumane nods in agreement. “So we’re having a party at my house tomorrow night. It’s not usually my kind of thing but my housemates...” he trails off nervously. “Well, anyway, I thought it’d be nice to invite some society members. What do you guys think?” he finished, gesturing between Tadashi and Yachi.

“Oh!” Yachi squeaks, face red. Tadashi has noticed that she often gets jumpy around larger men. He pats her shoulder in solidarity. “Um, parties aren’t really my thing,” she says, eyes to the ground. “Maybe next time?”

Azumane smiles. “Sure thing, Yachi. What about you, Yamaguchi? You can bring a friend if you want?”

Tadashi remembers his promise. “I’ll be there,” he declares with a grin.

-x-

When Tadashi gets back to his dorm room that evening, he finds Kageyama already there, sitting at his desk reading a sports magazine. Tadashi greets him cheerily, receiving only a non-committal grunt in response.

“Hey Kageyama,” he tests, “you like parties, right?”

Kageyama makes a kind of ‘meh’ noise, shrugging his shoulders.

“ _ Okaaay _ ,” Tadashi drones, then tries again. “So if I invited you to a party tomorrow, would you say yes?” This finally draws Kageyama’s eyes from his magazine, and he looks up at Tadashi.

“Whose party?”

Tadashi smiles minutely, feeling that victory is virtually assured. “Azumane, from Dart Soc? It’s going to be at his house. Off campus.” He watches Kageyama’s deep blue eyes for a reaction. Kageyama seems to consider Tadashi’s words for a minute before replying.

“Who else is going?”

“A few people from Dart Soc, I’m not really sure. I won’t really know anyone, so please come?” he pleads. There’s a pause, Kageyama clearly weighing the pros and cons in his head.

“Hmm. Okay then,” he says finally with a short nod. A grin spreads across Tadashi’s face.

“Awesome. Thanks, Kageyama.”

Kageyama just hums his acknowledgment, eyes already back on his magazine.

-x-

Tadashi is buzzing with excitement the whole day in anticipation for the party. It is with great difficulty that he just about manages to focus on his classes, repeatedly telling his brain to  _ calm down, wait til later _ .

Maybe tonight he will finally click with Kageyama. Tadashi is sure there must be  _ something _ that Kageyama’s passionate about, he just has to figure out what and he will  _ surely _ open up to Tadashi. Yes, tonight will definitely be the night.

He even tries to convince Yachi to change her mind in their afternoon class together, but she politely declines once more, again promising that same “maybe next time”. While he’s disappointed that she won’t be there, he’s ready for it. He’s going to be new, confident, fun Tadashi, and he’s going to have a great night. He’s sure of it.

When he makes it back to his room, he still has a good three hours before they need to start their journey away from campus to Azumane’s house. Still, his excitement gets the better of him, and Tadashi ends up showered, dressed, and ready with still over two hours to go. Kageyama regards him curiously as Tadashi fidgets at his own desk, trying to occupy himself.

“Are you okay?” Kageyama asks doubtfully. Tadashi hopes that this hint of concern is the starting point of their soon-to-be unbreakable friendship.

“I’m fine, I’m fine, just excited,” Tadashi assures him, but Kageyama continues to look at him bizarrely. “What?” Tadashi asks, beginning to feel self-conscious under the steely blue stare.

“It’s just a party, Yamaguchi. Haven’t you been to loads before?” Kageyama’s head is cocked in question. Tadashi is starting to feel silly.

“I haven’t, actually. I wasn’t all that popular in high school,” he admits, nervously rubbing the back of his neck, disturbing the shorter hairs there that have come loose from his short ponytail.

“Oh. Me either,” Kageyama replies matter-of-factly. “You don’t need to be nervous, though. People like you.”

Tadashi is surprised by Kageyama’s statement, and they way he delivered it so casually. He thinks this may actually be the most his roommate has said to him since they moved in. A small smile works its way onto Tadashi’s lips, pleased with the tiny bit of progress he sees in their relationship.

“You think so?” he asks hopefully.

“Yep,” is Kageyama’s instant reply, and that’s all.

They don’t speak again til it’s time to leave. Tadashi scrolls through his phone one more time to check the address that Azumane has texted him; only 10 minutes away by bus. Simple enough, though Tadashi does feel some nerves at the prospect of going to his first off-campus house party. He prays to the universe that they don’t somehow get lost.

“Okay,” he says resolutely, “let’s go.”

The bus ride is essentially painless, the only issues coming when Kageyama decides to argue with Tadashi about the best route to walk to the house from the bus stop. Tadashi wins out if only for the fact that Kageyama has proven himself to be directionally illiterate with all the times he’s returned home late after getting lost on campus.

They arrive at the door to an unexceptional house, and after double checking the door number and street name against that of the text from Azumane, Tadashi knocks.

A muscular man with wildly spiked black-and-white hair and even wilder eyes opens the door to them.

“Hey!” he bellows, and Tadashi almost takes a step back. Even Kageyama’s eyes are wide with shock. “Glad you could make it, come on in,” the man says, seemingly rehearsed, and ushers them in.

The door closes and seems to trap the sound of music booming throughout the house. The man who let them in disappears as if in a flash, leaving Tadashi and Kageyama standing cluelessly in the hallway.

“Come on,” Tadashi calls to Kageyama over the music, resolving that their first task should be to find a kitchen.

They weave their way into the house, Tadashi following his instincts and guiding Kageyama to where he thinks a kitchen should be. He’s relieved to find that his instincts had been correct when the way in front of them opens up into a spacious kitchen, wide glass doors open and leading to a small garden to the side. There is a counter that looks to be dedicated to drinks, and that’s where Tadashi goes first.

He makes himself a vodka and coke. He’s never been a big drinker, but hey, this is his first real party of his university life, and he’s determined to do it right. Kageyama joins him and makes himself the same. When they’re done, they stand aimlessly in the fairly crowded kitchen. Tadashi leans in to speak to Kageyama over the music.

“We should stick together,” he shouts, and when he pulls back he sees Kageyama nodding fervently, eyes still wide.

Taking in a deep breath, Tadashi takes a hearty swig of his drink. He winces a little at the taste but swallows it down with ease. Tonight is going to be  _ fun _ . He’s going to make sure of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Party time! Hope you're having fun reading this! As always comments and kudos appreciated <3


	3. Chapter 3

Standing at the door of an unfamiliar house, flanked by Tanaka and Hinata, Kei feels incredibly uncomfortable. He can hear the music thumping from the other side of the door, and it’s making his stomach lurch uncomfortably. Parties are all fine and dandy  _ in theory _ , but Kei isn’t looking forward to putting it into practice. He almost feels nervous enough to stick to Tanaka and Hinata all night, but he thinks that would somehow be worse.

Tanaka knocks heavily on the door, practically vibrating with energy. Hinata is the same on Kei’s other side, bouncing on the balls of his feet as if he’s ready to leap. Kei sighs just as the door opens.

The man who stands behind it looks exhausted, broad shoulders hunched and brown eyes heavy.

“Asahi!” Tanaka exclaims, surging forward to clap the man on the back. “Liven up, man, it’s a party!” Asahi gives Tanaka a skeptical look.

“A party with  _ Bokuto _ ,” he says, and Kei doesn’t know who that is but from this guy’s tone it sounds bad. “I may not survive it, Ryu,” he laments. Tanaka laughs loudly and pats Asahi’s shoulder again.

“Noya’s already here?” he asks, to which Asahi just nods.

Tanaka grins and shuffles past him, motioning for Kei and Hinata to follow. Hinata bounds forward immediately, while Kei takes a more sluggish approach. He offers Asahi a polite nod and gets a wobbly smile in return. Kei knows how he feels.

Tailing Tanaka and Hinata is painfully easy, what with them both being loud enough to be heard throughout the packed house. With only a flicker of envy he watches as Tanaka greets every other person by name, easy and casual, and as Hinata’s wide grin garners some smiles in return. How can two people who are so  _ irritating _ have such innate charisma?

Slowly they weave through the house until they eventually make it to the kitchen. Tanaka immediately sets to making some sort of alcoholic concoction that is probably not safe for human consumption. Of course, Hinata takes a cup of it when offered. Tanaka holds a plastic cup of the potion out to Kei.

“Absolutely not,” Kei deadpans. “Do they have Kahlua?”

“’Fraid not, fancy boy,” Tanaka chuckles as he takes a gulp from the cup. He doesn’t even wince. Kei is a little scared. “They have rum, though. That’s close enough, right?”

Kei sighs. “Rum will have to do,” he says, and starts mixing his own drink. He’d be a fool to let Tanaka, judging by Hinata’s face after he takes a sip of his own drink.

Rum and coke in hand, Kei straightens up to scan the room for any familiar faces. He’s sure he’s probably seen most of them around campus but he’s never spoken to any of them. Predictable, really.

“Oh!” Hinata exclaims, drawing Kei’s attention. “I think I know that guy!” He points across the kitchen towards a boy who would be tall if his shoulders weren’t slumped, with smooth, black hair and deep blue eyes. He stands with a boy of similar height, though this one stands proud and tall, bright brown eyes hungrily taking everything in. Kei can faintly make out the freckles on this boy's tan cheeks.

“Hey!” Hinata calls across the room with a grin, waving frantically. Kei groans internally.  _ Why does he always have to be so loud? _ The blue eyed boy glances up at the noise, then scowls slightly as his eyes fall on Hinata. A small snicker comes from Kei, and he covers his mouth with his hand to hide it. Maybe that guy would be more his kind of person.

The freckled boy leans in to say something to the scowler, then smiles and waves back at Hinata. Hinata takes this as an invitation to charge them, bouncing over to their side of the kitchen. When Kei looks around for Tanaka he is nowhere to be seen.  _ Oh _ . Unsure of what else to do with himself, Kei stalks after Hinata, only mildly annoyed that he doesn’t have the courage to use this opportunity to ditch Hinata.

“You’re in my nutrition class!” Hinata yells once he’s in front of the slumped boy, pointing a finger is his face. Blue eyes narrow once more, looking at Hinata as if he is a very annoying insect buzzing around between his eyes. Kei fights another smirk. He thinks he might like this guy, even if only for their shared disdain for Kei’s overzealous roommate.

When the silence has stretched enough to become uncomfortable and the blue eyed boy still hasn’t replied, the boy next to him clears his throat, softly nudging him while smiling uncomfortably.

“Kageyama, be polite,” the boy murmurs through his forced smile. Kei meets his wide brown eyes then, and the boy offers him an apologetic look.

“You’re not very smart,” Kageyama says at last to Hinata. The freckled boy’s face blanches, smile falling from his face. Kei can feel his face heating up as he tries to hold in his laughter. Hinata looks indignant.

“You don’t even know me!” Hinata shouts back, voice made high pitched by his anger and surprise. The freckled boy puts his hands up, moves to settle the dispute, but Hinata and Kageyama ignore him completely.

“You talk a lot in class,” Kageyama says matter-of-factly, “and you never give the right answer.”

“Well,” Hinata huffs, finger now pointed accusingly at Kageyama, “at least I try! You never even give an answer!”

“How can I give an answer when I don’t know it?” Kageyama responds, his voice getting louder to match Hinata’s volume. Maybe he _ isn’t _ the type of person Kei could be friends with after all. He’s obviously just as dumb as Hinata is, for starters.

“If you don’t know the answer then you’re not smart either!” Hinata shrieks.

“At least I’m not dumb  _ and _ loud!” Kageyama bellows back, disproving his own point.

“Actually, you’re both being  _ very loud _ and  _ very dumb _ right now!” This outburst comes from Kageyama’s freckled friend. Hinata and Kageyama whip their heads around to look at him and he glowers back at them. They both seem to shrink under his eyes, and Kei can’t help but be impressed that this stranger has managed to shut Hinata up so effectively. “Kageyama!” he calls, and Kageyama flinches. “Say sorry!”

Kageyama grumbles out an apology, shoulders slumping once more, and he rubs the back of his head self-consciously, refusing to make eye contact with Hinata. Hinata puffs up his chest, pleased at having won. That is, until the freckled boy speaks again.

“And you!” he points at Hinata, who seems startled at being addressed in the same tone that had been used on Kageyama. “You say sorry, too!”

“But he started it!” Hinata sputters incredulously.

“I don’t care who started it! Say you’re sorry!” Kei puts his hand over his mouth to cover his snickering. This guy sounds like a parent to two unruly toddlers and Kei is finding it hilarious. Even more hilarious is that it’s working.

“Sorry,” Hinata mumbles, also avoiding eye contact. He and Kageyama both look very grumpy at having been told off. There are tears building in the corners of Kei’s eyes as he tries to stifle the sounds of his laughter.

“Okay then,” the boy then sighs, looking exhausted at playing mediator. Kei’s laughter dies in his throat when the boy then turns to him. “Sorry about him,” he says, gesturing to Kageyama. “He’s just...like that, I guess.”

“Yeah, him too,” Kei replies after clearing his throat, nodding his head towards Hinata. The boy grins at him, the smile genuine and way too wide. Kei almost feels blinded by it.

“Um, I’m Yamaguchi Tadashi,” the boy introduces himself, holding his hand out towards Kei. Tentatively, Kei shakes it. “And this is my roommate, Kageyama.”

“Tsukishima Kei. The idiot is Hinata.”

Yamaguchi giggles at this, the kind that says he knows he shouldn’t be laughing at the misfortune of others but can’t help it. Kei feels a smile start to tug at the corners of his mouth. Yeah, he can see himself being friends with this guy.

Hinata scowls up at Kei before huffing about how he’s going to go look for Tanaka and storming off into the crowd. He’ll be fine, probably, Kei thinks, until he watches Hinata return to the drinks counter. If he’s already finished whatever Tanaka mixed for him... Kei tries not to think about it, instead turning back towards Yamaguchi. Yamaguchi is unfocused, eyes sweeping over the crowd absently. Kei wonders if he has other friends he’s hoping to meet up with here. Selfishly, Kei hopes not, enjoying the easy warmth of Yamaguchi’s presence.

“Looking for someone?” he asks, aiming for casual but probably falling more into biting. Talking to people is hard, okay? Yamaguchi’s attention snaps back to Kei and he lets out a nervous laugh, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Sorry, no...” Yamaguchi trails off, looking down into his drink as he swirls it in his hands. “I actually don’t really know anyone here. Just Azumane, one of the guys who lives here.”

A beacon in Kei’s head immediately lights up. Maybe this party won’t be so bad if he can spend it with Yamaguchi… Kei banishes that last thought from his head, more than a little embarrassed at having thought it, then clears his throat and takes a swig of his drink. He does  _ not _ like rum.

“I don’t know anyone either,” he says evenly, sliding his free hand into his pocket to appear nonchalant. When Yamaguchi looks right into his eyes and smiles, Kei has to look away. Yamaguchi doesn’t seem to notice, or perhaps he just doesn’t mind.

“Oh, cool!” he says enthusiastically. “Maybe we could hang out, then. If you want to, that is.” Yamaguchi’s freckles are tinted pink as he asks. Kei is really glad that he asked. He doesn’t think he’d have been able to summon the courage to do so himself.

“Okay,” Kei says simply before taking another gulp of his drink. He  _ really _ doesn’t like rum. However, he does like the way Yamaguchi is smiling now, bright and grateful and aimed directly at him. Kei doesn’t look right at it, like how you don’t look straight into the sun, but he’s happy to bask in its glow.

Then Kageyama downs whatever liquid is left in his cup. “Getting another drink,” he says brusquely, and suddenly Kei is alone with Yamaguchi.

“We’ll be right here!” Yamaguchi calls after Kageyama, and Kei can see some nervousness in his eyes as Yamaguchi watches him go.

“Have you been friends for long?” Kei asks. Is Kageyama going to come as some sort of two-for-one if Kei hopes to befriend Yamaguchi? While Kei does find him to be amusing, he’s not sure if Kageyama is really all that different to Hinata, and the thought of having _ two _ idiots around is mildly distressing.

“Hmm?” Yamaguchi hums as he turns back to Kei. “Well, not exactly. This is probably the most time I’ve spent with him since moving here, actually. He’s not the easiest guy to get to know...” He tapers off, then his eyes widen slightly. “Not that I don’t like him! He’s not a bad roommate!” he rushes out. “I guess it just takes time.” He sighs and sips his drink. Kei gets what he means; Hinata isn’t the worst, not  _ really _ , but it’s hard when you don’t instantly click. Maybe this is him clicking with Yamaguchi?

“I understand,” is what Kei says to convey this. Yamaguchi seems to get it, smiling and nodding.

“Well, I guess that’s what parties are for!” Yamaguchi chirps brightly, punctuated with a swig of his drink. 

“Yeah, it is,” Kei agrees, and he really means it. Maybe this party won't be so bad after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi friends, hope you liked this one! The next one has already been written and will be posted midweek. Thanks for reading!!


	4. Chapter 4

As he makes his way unsteadily to the bathroom after finishing his second drink, Shouyou is definitely feeling the effects of the alcohol. In his tipsy state, he’s feeling more annoyed than usual at Tsukishima’s digs and jabs. However, he is far more annoyed at Kageyama.

Shouyou considers himself a very friendly person, but it seems that he keeps getting pushed towards people who just don’t appreciate this. First he got randomly roomed with Tsukishima, the most miserable person _ever_ , and now the only other person he vaguely recognises at this party is Kageyama, the one person who could possibly rival Tsukishima when it comes to grumpiness. Tanaka is awesome, but he only really hangs out with Shouyou if Tsukishima is there, which is kind of a buzzkill, to be honest. Shouyou just wants to meet someone who wants to be his friend as much as he wants to be theirs.

Stumbling into the bathroom and fumbling to lock the door, Shouyou lets out a sigh. He’s shaking himself off when he notices the faint jingle of tinny music, and the clicking of buttons being pressed. _What the fuck?_ Hastily zipping up his jeans, Shouyou whips his head around in search of the source of the noise.

He zeroes in on the bathtub, its contents hidden by the drawn shower curtain. Squinting at said curtain, Shouyou’s heart begins to race. Isn’t this how people die in horror movies? Although, in those movies, the music is usually a lot creepier than this barely audible 8-bit tune. With a deep breath, he steels himself before drawing back the curtain.

The person who is sitting in the bathtub does not look like a horror movie murderer. He looks more like a squatter to be honest, with the way he seems to have built a blanket nest to make the bath more comfortable. He doesn't even look up at the sudden intrusion, still hunched over what looks to be an old PSP, long black hair with faint blonde at the tips hiding his face like a veil. Shouyou clears his throat, just in case the person isn’t ignoring him and just hasn’t seen him.

“You should wash your hands,” the person says, without looking up, in a soft, monotone voice.

“Oh!” Shouyou can feel the blush creeping up his neck. “Uh, yeah,” he nods and moves to the sink to comply. He can’t help but glance back over his shoulder as he does. The person in the bath still hasn’t looked away from his game console. When he still hasn't spoken again by the time Shouyou is drying his hands, Shouyou clears his throat again.

“Um,” he starts awkwardly, “why are you in the bathtub?”

“Hiding,” the person replies evenly, eyes still glued to his screen.

“Why?” Shouyou asks. He should probably get back to looking for Tanaka, but he’s kind of intrigued by this person, and really, this is the first conversation he’s had tonight where he’s not been shouted at.

“Don’t really like parties.” He finally looks up at Shouyou, and his eyes are golden and sharp.

“Oh.” Shouyou sways slightly. Maybe he should sit down. “Can I hang out with you for a while?”

Golden eyes assess him for a second before the person offers a short nod. He shuffles backwards to make room as Shouyou clambers into the bathtub to sit facing him. Shouyou can feel the faucet digging into his back but other than that, it’s comfortable.

“I’m Hinata Shouyou, by the way,” Shouyou says, grinning. “What’s your name?”

“Kozume Kenma.”

“Nice to meet you, Kenma,” Shouyou chirps, though he slurs slightly. “So what game’re you playing?”

He sits in the bathtub with Kenma for a while, he thinks, but he’s not all too sure. They only end up having to leave the bathroom when they can no longer ignore the banging of disgruntled partygoers on the door.

“I think we’d better get out of here,” Shouyou mumbles as he drags himself out of the tub. “Wanna come help me find my other friends?”

“Other...?” Kenma questions from where he still sits in the blankets.

“Yeah,” Shouyou says, as if it’s obvious, “other than you!”

He grins down at Kenma, who stares up at him with wide golden eyes before nodding and murmuring an “okay”. Shouyou holds a hand out and helps Kenma out of the tub, but then Kenma has to keep hold of Shouyou’s arm to keep him steady. Standing, Shouyou feels the alcohol make his head swim again.

A queue has formed outside of the bathroom, and those who wait in it glare at Shouyou and Kenma as they exit and make their way back downstairs. Their stares seem to make Kenma shrink, ducking his head so that his hair hides his face. Shouyou is predictably unaffected, grinning dopily at the blurry faces as he passes.

He stumbles a few times on his way down the stairs until Kenma, sighing, shoves his PSP into his oversized hoodie pocket and grabs Shouyou’s wrist.

“You need water,” he says as he pulls Shouyou through the lounge towards the kitchen. Shouyou follows obediently.

As he’s pulled gently along, he scans the crowd for Tanaka, or, failing that, Tsukishima. He sees neither, which annoys him. Sure, Tanaka had disappeared way earlier but he actually knew people at this party so that was to be expected. What excuse did Tsukishima have? Shouyou wonders then if Tsukishima has gone home and abandoned him here. This thought makes him even more annoyed; if Tsukishima has ditched him, Shouyou vows that he will be extra loud for the next week just to get back at him for it.

“Oi, Hinata!” Shouyou hears as he stands by the sink and waits for Kenma to fill him a cup. He looks around for the source of the sound, but the room spins when he moves his head too fast. _Gross_. He closes his eyes, tries to settle his spinning head. When he opens them again, Kageyama stands in front of him, eyes shifting nervously.

“Oh, it’s you,” Shouyou mumbles, squinting up at him. “What do you want?” He readies himself for an argument, but then Kageyama sighs, his shoulders slumping further.

“I can’t find Yamaguchi and I don’t know anyone else here. Can I please stay with you?” Kageyama’s eyes are genuine and pleading as he asks, and Shouyou feels his anger die in his chest. He’s about to say ‘yes’ when Kenma pushes a cup of water into Shouyou’s hands.

Shouyou mumbles his thanks and takes a deep drink from the cup. He sees Kenma glancing curiously at Kageyama, but Kageyama seems to be avoiding both of their eyes.

“Sorry,” Kageyama says stiffly. “I didn’t realise you were with someone. I’ll leave you to the party.” He nods awkwardly and turns to leave. On instinct, Shouyou’s hand shoots out to grab his forearm, stopping him.

“You don’t have to go, you know,” Shouyou assures. He doesn’t let go until Kageyama turns back around to face him. Kageyama’s cheeks are flushed pink, an uncomfortable frown on his face.

“Th-thanks,” he forces out.

Shouyou grins. “No problem.”

Kenma is back to playing on his PSP, sitting on the kitchen tiles with his back against the cupboards and his knees up in front of his chest. Shouyou leans on the counter above him and sips his water. Kageyama shifts restlessly on his feet, clearly uncomfortable.

“Do you want some water?” Shouyou asks, speaking simply to fill the awkward silence. Kageyama finally looks at him, scowl turning contemplative.

“I’d prefer some milk,” he mutters. Shouyou snorts out a laugh, sloshing his water in his cup.

“Well then, let's get you some milk.”

If you’d told Shouyou at the start of this night that he’d end up raiding a stranger’s fridge to find milk for his abrasive classmate, he would have probably been extremely confused. Maybe he would’ve laughed. He’s certainly laughing now, tipsy and giddy as he digs through shelves of protein yogurt and egg cartons. Even Kageyama is snickering beside him; maybe he’s a little buzzed too. Kenma glances up at them for a second before returning his focus to his game, seemingly unfazed by their antics.

“Ooh, they have pudding!” Shouyou exclaims, making Kageyama laugh harder. They’re both giggling so loudly that they don’t hear the footsteps behind them until the person is already looming over them.

“Who the hell are you and what are you doing in my fridge?” a voice says, and Shouyou freezes, Kageyama stiffening beside him. The owner of the voice is taller than the both of them, smirking down at them with narrowed eyes. Neither has a chance to answer before another voice pipes up beside them.

“They’re with me, Kuro,” Kenma says, standing to approach them. “They want milk.”

“Oh!” The man – Kuro? – wraps his arm around Kenma’s shoulder, pulling him close. Kenma huffs as he does but allows it. “Well, any friend of Kenma’s is a friend of mine. The milk is in the door shelf,” he grins at them. Somehow, he still looks intimidating.

Shouyou and Kageyama share a look, then Shouyou looks back up at Kenma’s friend, who is watching them expectantly, still smiling. Shouyou gulps. Kageyama nudges him, eyes shifting between him and the expectant face that watches them. Apprehensively, Shouyou picks up the milk and pours a large serving into the plastic cup that Kaygeyama hands him. He gives the cup back to Kageyama, replaces the milk, and then closes the fridge, looking back up at Kenma’s friend.

He smiles wider, seemingly satisfied, then leads Kenma away, leaning in to ask where he’d been hiding. Kenma throws a soft smile over his shoulder at Shouyou before turning back to answer his friend’s question.

Simultaneous sighs of relief turn into fits of giggles once Shouyou and Kageyama are left alone, Kageyama almost spilling his precious milk as he barks his harsh laughter.

“You’d better be damn grateful for that milk,” Shouyou manages between giggles, “because I think I just had a heart attack getting it.”

“I can’t believe you actually did it. You’re such a dumbass,” Kageyama wheezes, clutching at the cup as his shoulders shake. Shouyou can’t even find it in himself to be mad at the insult, swept up in Kageyama’s amusement.

“Shut up,” he laughs, nudging Kageyama with his shoulder. _What an asshole_ , Shouyou thinks, and he can’t help the way the thought makes him smile even harder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love these idiots, I really do. I hope you enjoyed reading this! Next chapter should be up around the weekend :-D


	5. Chapter 5

The things we regret the most are those that we don’t do. This has been one of Tadashi’s mantras since moving to this city for university, and he finds it truer than ever tonight. Because he knows he would have regretted not spending this party getting to know Tsukishima. They’ve stuck together since the abrupt departures of their roommates and Tadashi is  _ so _ glad they did.

He is more than a little drunk by now, and he’s hoping that it’s not too obvious, because Tsukishima is funny and tall and kind of _really_ _attractive._ Tadashi really wants to play it cool but inside he is combusting.

They’d left the kitchen about 20 minutes after Kageyama ran off, the kitchen becoming more packed and clearly putting Tsukishima on edge. So out of the open back doors they had gone, and have been huddled in plastic garden chairs since, only leaving to get more drinks (though Tsukishima kept offering to bring Tadashi’s to him,  _ swoon _ ). People have been filtering in and out of the small brick garden all night to smoke, but Tadashi and Tsukishima have been undisturbed in their private little corner, stars twinkling weakly above them.

“What’s your star sign?” Tadashi asks absently as he watches them flicker against the dark night sky.

“Libra, I think,” Tsukishima replies.

“Hmm.” Tadashi nods sagely, eyes closed. “That suits you, Tsukki.”

“What?” Tsukishima laughs softly. When Tadashi opens his eyes, he sees that Tsukishima is looking at him curiously.

“Well, libras are supposed to be good listeners,” Tadashi starts, but stops when he sees Tsukishima's smirk. “What?”

“Not that,” Tsukishima murmurs, still smiling. “What did you just call me?”

“Oh.” Tadashi can feel his face heating up. He hadn’t meant to call him ‘Tsukki’, not out loud. “I guess I was just looking at the moon and… Well, I think it suits you,” he blurts nervously, reaching up to scratch at the nape of his neck. “I didn’t mean to.”

“You can call me ‘Tsukki’.” Tadashi looks up at Tsukishima but he’s not looking back, staring into his drink. “If you want.” If he squints, Tadashi thinks he can make out a slight flush of pink high on Tsukishima’s cheeks. “I don’t mind,” he says, still not meeting Tadashi’s eyes.

“Okay, Tsukki,” Tadashi grins.

Tsukishima smiles back, before clearing his throat and declaring that he needs another drink.

“My turn to get them this time, Tsukki,” Tadashi insists, plucking Tsukishima’s cup from his hands before he has a chance to protest. “Be right back!”

The kitchen is much quieter than it had been when they’d first left to sit outside. How long had they been out there? While he’s anxious to get back out to Tsukishima, Tadashi finds his attention drawn to the two figures standing by the fridge. He recognises them both but can’t quite believe how comfortable they seem to look in each other’s company. Wait; are they  _ laughing? _

“Kageyama,” Tadashi calls as he approaches them. Both figures turn to face him, and they look like children caught doing something that they know they shouldn’t be doing. “What happened to you?”

“A guy I knew from school dragged me into a game of ‘Ring of Fire’,” Kageyama responds, face back in a frown. “It was...not good.”

“But you said you didn’t know anyone here!” Tsukishima’s roommate pipes up beside Kageyama. Tadashi thinks his name was Hinata? Kageyama’s frown deepens.

“Well I didn’t want to hang out with him,” Kageyama shoots back.

“Does that mean that you wanted to hang out with  _ me _ ?” Hinata grins smugly. Tadashi bites his lip to keep from laughing. Kageyama looks scandalized.

“No, dumbass, I didn’t!” he yells, but that doesn’t deter Hinata who still looks very pleased with himself.

“ _ I _ may be a dumbass,” he smarms, “but  _ you _ still want to hang out with me.” Kageyama swats at him for this, but Hinata dodges sloppily, giggling all the while.

“No I don’t! In fact, I’m gonna hang out with Yamaguchi instead!” Kageyama proclaims.

“Why don’t you  _ both _ hang out with me,” Tadashi says through a laugh. “Tsukki’s waiting for me outside. We were wondering where you guys had gotten to.” They don’t need to know that Tsukishima had actually been quite happy to be rid of the ‘simpleton idiots’ (Tsukishima’s words, not Tadashi’s). But now Tadashi thinks that Tsukishima will surely appreciate seeing some familiar faces and be glad to know they’re okay. Probably.

“ _ Tsukki? _ ” Hinata repeats, tone disbelieving. “Are you talking about Tsukishima?”

“Uh, yeah,” Tadashi replies, and he can feel his face growing pink. “Is that weird?” He scratches his cheek self-consciously; he feels kind of stupid saying the nickname without Tsukishima there to smile softly in response to it.

“Probably not,” Hinata shrugs, “I just know that if  _ I _ called him that, Tsukishima would probably kill me.”

Tadashi feels his heartbeat stutter just a little bit. He can’t help but feel kind of...special. It makes him feel warm inside. He pushes it down, shaking the thought from his head.

“Well, we shouldn’t keep him waiting,” Tadashi says. “You guys want drinks?”

The bottles sitting on the drinks counter are all looking considerably more empty than they had the last time Tadashi had visited it. Although, that had been a while back now.  _ Tsukki is such a gentleman _ . Tadashi feels his cheeks heating up again.  _ Shut up, stupid. _

Kageyama and Hinata pour their own drinks while Tadashi makes one for Tsukishima and one for himself. Rum for Tsukishima, even though he doesn’t like rum; he likes Kahlua.  _ Tsukki is so cool _ . Once more, Tadashi wills his thoughts to  _ please _ be quiet and let his face return to its original colour. He doesn’t want Tsukishima to see him so flustered, as if just one look at Tadashi’s face will reveal the silly little crush he’s quickly developing in all its glory.

When they get back outside, Tadashi is surprised to see that Tsukishima is not alone. Sitting in what was once Tadashi’s seat beside Tsukishima is a large man, in stature and in personality, Tadashi can tell from his exaggerated gestures. The man is weirdly...owl-like, all round eyes and spiked hair. He’s talking animatedly to Tsukishima, who looks  _ extremely _ uncomfortable and isn’t trying to hide his disinterest. However, once he notices Tadashi, Tadashi could  _ swear  _ that he sees Tsukishima’s face light up, so subtle that Tadashi may have imagined it. He hopes he didn’t.

If Tsukishima’s face lit up when he saw Tadashi, it falls doubly when he spots Hinata and Kageyama behind him. Tadashi offers him an apologetic smile, shifting his eyes between Tsukishima and the man who is still chatting away, oblivious. Tsukishima drops his head into his hands in response. It’s so dramatic that Tadashi can’t help but laugh.  _ Tsukki is so funny _ . Cue the blush. Tsukishima lifts his head again and looks quizzically at Tadashi, a tiny smirk on his lips. Can he see the blush?

“Here’s your drink, Tsukki,” Tadashi blurts out, thrusting the cup towards Tsukishima and effectively silencing the man beside him. Tsukishima takes the cup, though it seems that he does so more for fear of spillage than for thirst, eyes full of question as he looks at Tadashi.

“Tsukki?” the man parrots. He is  _ loud _ . “That’s so cute! Introduce me to your friends then, Tsukki!” He’s beaming, chest puffed out.

“Please don’t call me that,” Tsukishima sighs. Tadashi’s heart trips again.  _ Special _ . “And you should probably introduce yourself, seeing as how I don’t actually know you.”

“ _ Ohoho? _ ” the man laughs. “You should be nicer to me, Tsukki, seeing as I’m your gracious host!” Somehow he puffs up more. Tadashi hears a gasp from behind him; probably Hinata. Tsukishima rolls his eyes exaggeratedly.

“So cool!” Hinata gushes, shuffling to Tadashi’s side to look at the man with starry eyes. The man’s amber eyes twinkle at the praise, his smile growing wider.

“You still haven’t told us your name, you know,” Tsukishima deadpans. Tadashi snickers.

“You’re so sarcastic, Tsukki!” the man pouts. The expression is gone in a flash though, when something seems to catch his eye back in the house. “Oh, looks like I’m needed for some hostly duties inside,” he says, jumping out of the chair. “Enjoy the party!” he calls as he bounds back into the house.

Left as if in the wake of a hurricane, the four of them are silent for a moment. Then, Kageyama breaks the silence.

“So does anyone actually know that guy’s name?”

Tadashi snorts out a laugh. Hinata cackles beside Kageyama. Even Tsukishima smirks. Kageyama just looks between the three of them, confused at how his genuine question elicited such a response. This only makes Tadashi laugh harder, patting him on the back comfortingly.

“Dumbass,” Hinata mutters with a grin as he pushes past them to sit in the now vacant seat next to Tsukishima. Sipping his drink, Tadashi pretends that he isn’t jealous of their proximity.

“Shut up,” Kageyama mumbles, but there’s no heat behind it, the pink of his cheeks barely visible in the dimly lit garden.

They laugh some more, easy and genuine, and Tadashi feels that warmth in his chest again. He and Kageyama pull up some more plastic garden chairs to sit in a tight huddle with the other two. It’s not quite as cozy as it was when it was just Tadashi and Tsukishima, but Tadashi can’t find it in himself to mind. They’re all pleasantly drunk, laughing and joking like they’ve been friends for years, and Tadashi feels so warm, even in the cold, autumn air. Like he  _ belongs _ .

Grinning, he tries to steal a glance at Tsukishima across their little cluster. His endeavour is not as stealthy as he’d hoped, for when he looks, he finds golden eyes already looking back. His heart skips, his grin shrinking into a softer smile, one meant only for Tsukishima. Hinata and Kageyama bicker in the background, oblivious, and Tsukishima offers Tadashi the smallest of smiles in return. But, oh, it’s so  _ real _ , Tadashi feels the air around them still. If he could live in this moment, he surely would.

But the universe isn’t so kind. As quickly as the moment appeared, it is ended by an over excited Hinata spilling his drink into Tsukishima’s lap. Hinata’s squeals of apology and Tsukishima’s stern admonishing and Kageyama’s barking laughter bulldoze the moment, bury it under their noise and energy. Tadashi smiles. He doesn’t mind. Not even a little bit. He does hope there will be more moments like it, though.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ugh I miss parties. Hope you liked it! Next chapter is written, will post it in a few days probably :-D xo


	6. Chapter 6

Kei wakes up with a dry mouth and a throbbing at his temple. The room is dead quiet but for the guttural snores that come from the bundle of blankets piled haphazardly onto Hinata’s bed. Kei assumes that they contain Hinata and that he is the source of the snores. He hopes so, at least.

Sitting up, Kei rummages around his bedside table for his glasses so that he can check his phone for the time. 7:38am. Usually he’d be happy to be awake at this time, but given how they didn’t make it back to the dorm til gone 3am last night, Kei is thoroughly unimpressed. He drops back to his pillow with a sigh, letting his phone fall somewhere in his sheets. He can feel his pulse pounding in his skull. He  _ really _ doesn’t like rum.

But it’s hard to stay salty about being awake so early with a hangover when he remembers last night. He doesn’t even try to fight the smile he can feel tugging at the corner of his mouth. There’s no denying it; last night was  _ fun _ . Not that he’ll admit it to Tanaka – he doesn’t deserve the satisfaction  _ or _ the credit.

Closing his eyes and burrowing further into his blankets, Kei tries to recapture the retreating edges of sleep. Surely his body needs it after yesterday, is crying out for it with the pain in his head, but it eludes him. He’s not sure how long he lies there, but soon enough he hits his limit. If he doesn’t escape Hinata’s snorting soon he is positive he will implode.

He makes little noise as he throws back his blankets and pads to the bathroom on bare feet. He needs to get out of this room, because  _ of course _ his annoying roommate is annoying even when unconscious. A glance in the mirror tells Kei that he is definitely going to suffer from the lack of sleep, but what can you do?

His shower lasts a lot longer than it should, but it’s not like he’s in any sort of rush. When he finally emerges, he almost feels human again. After vigorously brushing the fluffy alcohol film from his teeth and mouth, the only evidence left from the night is his persistent headache. That, and the desire to see Yamaguchi again. Kei freezes for a second, toothbrush still in hand. He’s not sure he’s ever been so eager to spend time with another person before, not since he grew out of wanting to follow Akiteru everywhere. It feels weird. Not bad, just unfamiliar.

When he leaves the bathroom Hinata is still snoring. With a sigh, Kei gathers his laptop and class notes into his satchel, pockets his keys and phone and heads for the door. He grabs his headphones from his desk as he leaves and ignores the thrum of his skull as he puts them over his ears and sets his music to shuffle.

The walk to the library is fairly short, made shorter by the fact that it is barely past 8am on a Saturday, leaving the streets and roads fairly deserted. Kei likes the quiet of early mornings; he thinks maybe that’s why he’s always been a morning person. The October air is cool and crisp, making Kei’s breath come out in visible clouds as he walks. He absently wishes he’d picked up his scarf in his rush to leave but it doesn’t matter. The library is always too hot anyway, so it’ll balance out. The Hinata-like logic of that thought makes Kei grimace. Is stupid contagious?

Predictably, there are very few people inside the library. Kei goes directly to his unofficially claimed table in the back, annoyed that the library cafe is not yet open. His second regret of the morning is that he didn’t pack his water bottle, and his dehydration is not helping his headache. Whatever, he’ll go and find a fountain or something once he’s set up.

Settling into his seat, he opens his laptop, fully intent on bringing up his notes on Orthodox saints when he stills for a moment, eyes zeroing in on the little Facebook icon in his browser. He remembers that despite having a lot of fun last night, he never mustered up the courage to ask for Yamaguchi’s number. Not even the rum had helped, and the moment seemed to have passed once Hinata and Kageyama rejoined them.

But if he  _ did _ want to contact him, he could just add him as a friend, right? That wasn’t weird, to send a friend request to someone you’d spent a whole night with. Certainly not weird. Before he can talk himself out of it, Kei types Yamaguchi’s full name into the search bar, glancing around him as if he’s doing something untoward. Which he isn’t. What he’s doing is very normal, actually.

Yamaguchi’s is the first profile on the list of results, his icon a seemingly recent photo of him and an older woman. Yamaguchi has his arm around the woman, who is a few inches shorter than him, and he’s wearing a grin that looks almost too big for his face, his eyes scrunched earnestly and his free hand thrown up in a peace sign. The woman is smiling too, bronze freckled skin matching Yamaguchi’s, the hand that isn’t around Yamaguchi’s waist lovingly placed on his chest. She’s probably Yamaguchi’s mother. Kei smiles unconsciously, taken in by the evident joy in the photo.

Kei hovers his cursor over the ‘Add Friend’ button hesitantly. He should do it. He should add Yamaguchi as a friend. But then Kei realises that Yamaguchi’s profile is public. Well, if his profile is public, he’s surely fine with people looking through it, right? Yeah, Kei’s not being creepy if he just scrolls a little bit, just to see if he  _ does _ want to send a friend request. Although, he’s not sure just what he could find here that would make him  _ not  _ want to. But that’s beside the point.

Ignoring the voice in his head that’s telling him  _ not _ to stalk potential friends online, Kei scrolls down. There aren’t many statuses, mainly posts from other people that have Yamaguchi tagged in them. Family members, most likely. Kei keeps scrolling until his attention is grabbed by one post in particular.

It’s a memory, shared by the woman in Yamaguchi’s profile picture. Her name is Yamaguchi too; definitely his mother. This fact is made clearer by the photo she has shared. It’s an old photo, grainy like it was taken on a disposable camera. Kei clicks it to make it full screen, and he can’t help how his cheeks grow hot when he sees it in all its glory. The subject of the photo is a tiny Yamaguchi, maybe about 5 or 6, and he’s grinning that same, blinding grin, chubby cheeks dotted with freckles. And he’s wearing the cutest little dinosaur costume.

Kei’s whole face is warm as he wheezes out a laugh, pushing his glasses up into his hair to bury his face in his hands as he silently chuckles. He feels light headed by the time he manages to sit up again, having to bite his lip to stop himself from breaking down again when he catches sight of the photo that still covers his screen. As soon as he closes it, he scrolls back to the top of Yamaguchi’s profile and clicks the ‘Add Friend’ button. He  _ needs _ to be friends with this guy.

Once he’s done this he closes the tab, now ready to actually do some work. He may as well, while he’s here. He reviews and edits his notes for a while, on autopilot until the digital clock on his laptop ticks 9am, signaling the long awaited opening of the cafe.

He doesn’t even think twice about abandoning his laptop and the rest of his belongings, taking only his wallet to the cafe. There are a couple of people already queued at the counter, the worker behind it taking what looks to be the first order of the day. Kei grabs two bottles of water from the fridge and goes to stand in line.

Tapping his finger against one of the bottles in his hand, absently looking around, he suddenly thinks he recognises the back-of-the-head in front of him. Kei squints at the smooth black hair that stands just slightly below eye-level, considering for a second before clearing his throat.

When Kageyama turns around, he has a blank expression on his face. His eyes narrow slightly when they meet Kei’s, and he offers a stiff nod in greeting.

“You’re up early,” Kei comments, the question of ‘why’ unspoken.

“Mmm,” Kageyama hums in accord, “gym.”

“Oh,” is all Kei offers in response. The silence becomes awkward very quickly, and Kei is only saved from being crushed by it when the cafe worker gestures for Kageyama to make his order.

The lack of sleep is creeping up on Kei, making his limbs feel heavy and his brain foggy. He barely notices when he’s called forward, quickly blinking himself back into the present to make his order. He goes for a simple flat white and pays, moving to wait for his name to be called.

Back beside Kageyama, both of them glance at each other uncomfortably, clearly unsure of what to say. If anything, as Kei doesn’t feel nearly as close to Kageyama as he had last night. Well, he hadn’t felt  _ close _ to Kageyama, but it hadn’t been anywhere near this awkward. Kei worries briefly that maybe this is how it will feel the next time he sees Yamaguchi – if he does, that is. That would be a wound to his pride, if Yamaguchi felt as uncomfortable around Kei as Kei does right now. He finds himself regretting that friend request...

“Good to see that you got home safely last night,” Kageyama’s voice comes from beside Kei, stilted and formal. Kei turns to look at him, but Kageyama is looking straight ahead, eyes fixed purposefully away from Kei.

“Uh, yeah,” Kei replies, bemused. “You too.”

“Hinata was really drunk last night,” Kageyama says, a little more natural this time, finding his rhythm. “He’s gonna be so hungover today.”

“He’s probably still sleeping it off. I’m surprised you aren’t as well.”

“I always train in the morning,” Kageyama says, finally glancing at Kei. “What about you?”

“Hinata snores,” is Kei’s justification. He sees the corner of Kageyama’s lip quirk and feels his own mirror it.

“Of course he does,” Kageyama mutters, smile growing minutely. “That dumbass.” Kei doesn’t miss the hint of fondness in Kageyama’s voice. Weirdly, it soothes that nervous voice inside him, the one that has him overthinking everything. Because if Kageyama is already this invested in Hinata, surely it isn’t weird that he’s spent this morning at war with himself over whether or not to send Yamaguchi a stupid friend request.

Before Kei can respond, Kageyama’s name is called for him to collect his drink. He does, and nods to Kei as he leaves.

“Tell Hinata I said ‘hi’, I guess,” Kageyama says, and then makes towards the exit.

Kei just nods blankly. The request confuses him. Kageyama should really talk to Hinata himself; they already seem to get on better than Kei does with Hinata. He doesn’t get a chance to voice this before Kageyama is gone and Kei’s name is being called. Oh well. He’s sure they’ll figure it out themselves. Probably. They  _ are _ both very stupid.

With an internal shrug, Kei makes his way back to his table. May as well get some more work done while he’s here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Kageyama. I love him so much... Next chapter probably up around the weekend! Hope you enjoyed! Just in case you don't know, I'm @burnthisoka on twitter, come say hi :-D


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is up late! I've been kinda burnt out and needed a break but we're back on track now! There will probably be a little more time between updates thanks to work but hopefully never more than a week! ANYWAY happy reading! xo

The slamming of the dorm room door wakes Tadashi in a snort. Blearily he blinks his heavy eyes open to see what had caused the noise. Kageyama looks back from across the room, face slightly scrunched in...apology?

“Sorry,” Kageyama blurts. “I thought you’d be awake by now.”

Kageyama is dressed in his gym gear, face red from the cold air and maybe physical exertion. Tadashi fights the urge to burrow deeper into his duvet and drop right back to sleep, instead rubbing the sleep from his eyes with his fists.

“What time is it?” he asks, ignoring Kageyama’s unnecessary apology; if Kageyama thought he would be awake by now, chances are it’s pretty late.

“Just after midday,” Kageyama answers as he toes off his shoes.

Tadashi grunts in response. Not _that_ late then, not considering how late they arrived home last night. He can’t even manage to be surprised that Kageyama is up and about, and probably has been for hours; Tadashi knows by now that Kageyama’s self-discipline is solid, and not even a drunken late night could break it. Tadashi, on the other hand, has no self-discipline, and has long since given up on being ashamed of this fact. Maybe he could just close his eyes for another five minutes...

“I saw Tsukishima at the library cafe,” Kageyama pipes up, tone casual. Tadashi feels his whole body jolt into alertness, wishes of returning to sleep now long forgotten.

“Really?” he asks, trying not to sound too eager but probably failing. It’s okay, Kageyama won’t call him out on it. “Did you speak to him?”

“Mhm,” Kageyama hums his affirmation, moving to sit in his desk chair, his back now to Tadashi. When Kageyama doesn’t offer any more information, Tadashi tries to dig a little deeper.

“Did he...” He hesitates. He’s going to sound like a teenage girl if he asks, but he wants to know. “Did he ask about me?” He tries not to sound too hopeful.

“Hmm?” Kageyama turns his chair to face Tadashi now, his head cocked curiously. “No, should he have?”

Tadashi huffs, pouting petulantly and sinking into his duvet. “I guess not.”

Taking this to be the end of the conversation, Kageyama stands to collect his things and head into the bathroom to shower. When the bathroom door closes and Tadashi is left alone in the room, he lets out a long groan, throwing his duvet back and staring at the ceiling. _Stupid, pretty Tsukki_.

He slaps his hand around his bedside table in search of his phone. Absently he hopes he’d remembered to put it on charge last night. His fingers close around it and pull it towards his face. There’s no wire attached; how annoying.

The screen lights up, showing him his notifications, and Tadashi has to stare at it for a second before he can process the words on the screen. A text from his mum, he’ll answer that one later. Someone liked his last Instagram post, cool. _Tsukishima Kei has sent you a friend request_ . Oh. Wait, _what?_

He blinks a few times before reading it again. _Tsukishima Kei has sent you a friend request_ . With a gulp, Tadashi rushes to unlock his phone and open Facebook. Tsukishima’s profile picture shows his side profile from the chest up, bulky headphones over his ears, looking over some scenic backdrop. It looks like it was taken on a hike, maybe. His jawline is sharp and defined. Tadashi gulps again, feeling the flush creep up his neck. _So stupidly pretty_.

The blush grows hotter when Tadashi gives in to his urge to check the ‘Relationship Status’ tab. _Single_. He bites his lip to stop himself from grinning. Not like it even matters _._ It’ll probably never happen, but a boy can dream. He doesn’t allow himself to scroll through Tsukishima’s profile, afraid of what will happen if his face manages to get any hotter – Tadashi likes having skin, after all – so he presses ‘Accept’ on the friend request and locks his phone.

By the time Kageyama emerges from the bathroom, Tadashi’s face has returned to a normal colour, for which he is thankful. Tadashi doesn’t say a word as he ducks into the still-steamy bathroom. A cold shower should help clear his head.

And he does feel better after his shower, almost refreshed even. The remnants of a hangover flit around the edges of his brain, but it seems that all the sleep has allowed Tadashi to bypass the worst of it. Clean and dressed, grabs his phone from where he’d left it to charge and sits down at his desk. He’s wondering what he should do with his day when he’s interrupted by the grumble of his stomach. Oh yeah. He hasn’t eaten yet.

A faint idea sparks in his head, and once it does there’s nothing Tadashi can do to put it out. _You’ll regret it if you don’t_ , it shouts, unignorable. So he opens up the Messenger app on his phone and starts up a new chat. _Tsukishima Kei_. Tadashi types out a message and presses send before he can talk himself out of it.

**hey tsukki! ✨**

**are u busy today??**

**coz i was gonna go get some lunch if u wanna join me...👀**

He locks his phone to stop himself from staring at the screen and waiting for a response. It’s just lunch. And if Tsukishima does say no, it doesn’t mean he doesn’t like Tadashi; maybe he’s busy. Most people make plans in advance for Saturdays, so maybe he shouldn’t get his hopes up. But Tadashi tells himself to stop worrying about all that before Tsukishima’s even read the message. So he takes a deep breath and opens his laptop. Maybe he should actually get some work done this weekend.

Or maybe not. His phone buzzes against the desk, and Tadashi is unsure if he’s ever unlocked it so quickly in his life. It’s Tsukishima. He’s replied. With another deep breath, Tadashi opens the chat.

**Where do you have in mind?**

Is that a yes? Tadashi thinks that might be a yes. _Oh goodness_. He bites his lip and stares at the message. He didn’t actually have anywhere in mind, an oversight for which he now scolds himself. He decides to just be honest.

**idk 🤔🤔**

**i’m super hungry tho!!**

**any ideas???**

In all honesty, Tsukishima could suggest they go dumpster diving and eat their finds in a roadside ditch and Tadashi would still be all in. It’s ridiculous, but he accepts this, and is now at peace with it. Tsukishima’s reply pops up on his screen.

**Library?**

A much more acceptable option. Tadashi grins as he types out his message.

**sounds good! 😁**

**meet u there in 20??**

**See you then, Yamaguchi.**

It only takes Tadashi 10 minutes to get to the library. He finds he always ends up early when he’s excited. He should probably find them a table and wait. The next 10 minutes are sure to creep by, as time always does when you wish it would just speed up for a little while. He types out a message as he settles at a free table in the cafe.

**let me know when u get here!**

**i’m in the cafe ✌🏽**

The reply is almost instant.

**I’m already here.**

Well he hadn’t been expecting that. Tadashi whips his head around to try and locate Tsukishima in the fairly full cafe. He sees him after a few seconds, blond hair sticking out in tufts from under his bulky headphones. It looks like Tsukishima’s been there for a while, too; he’s nabbed one of the good tables, with the plush armchairs instead of the hard wooden dining chairs. He hasn’t spotted Tadashi, his eyes fixed on the open laptop in front of him.

Tadashi almost hates himself for how quickly he dives up from his seat. _Just calm down a bit, would you?_ He takes a more casual pace as he approaches Tsukishima’s table, smiling brightly when Tsukishima lifts his eyes in acknowledgement and shifts his headphones from his head to around his neck.

“Hey, Tsukki!” Tadashi beams, taking a seat in the free armchair. “You been here long?”

“Hmm, something like that,” Tsukishima replies wryly, the hint of a smirk on his lips.

“So studious,” Tadashi teases back, sinking further into the chair. “You’re like Kageyama. Disciplined.”

“I can’t believe you just said that.” Tsukishima looks and sounds appalled, and Tadashi can’t help but laugh. “You know, you can be quite savage when you want to be, Yamaguchi.”

“I really didn’t mean to be,” says Tadashi, laughing even harder.

Tsukishima looks like he’s holding back a laugh as he turns back to tap away on his laptop. As the silence settles, Tadashi feels fidgety. Is this an awkward silence? He hopes it’s not, because he’s really happy to see Tsukishima again and very much wants Tsukishima to feel the same about him. Tadashi bites his lip nervously, wondering if he should say something. When he sees Tsukishima glance curiously at him from behind his laptop, Tadashi almost jumps.

“Aren’t you going to get something to eat?” Tsukishima asks, quirking an eyebrow. “You said you were hungry.”

“Oh!” Tadashi replies, this time actually jumping. “Yeah!” He rises from the armchair and starts towards the counter before turning back awkwardly. “Um, did you want anything? While I’m there?” _Real smooth, Tadashi._

Tsukishima just shakes his head, and Tadashi heads towards the counter once more, thankful that Tsukishima can no longer see his face. This was all so much easier when they were drunk.

Getting in line, Tadashi spares a glance back at Tsukishima. Tsukishima’s head is still buried in his work, headphones back over his ears. It takes a lot of Tadashi’s willpower not to just stare. How does Tsukishima still look _this_ good? Isn’t he supposed to be hungover?

The person behind the counter calls Tadashi forward, and he has to shake his head to clear it. As he orders and pays, he gives himself a little pep talk. _Stop being so nervous,_ he tells himself. Because the new Tadashi doesn’t freak out in front of people he likes. The new Tadashi is fun and charming and people _like_ him. He repeats this in his head as he takes his food back to the table. _And Tsukki is gonna like me too._


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was hard lol. I never would have finished it without the hq discord server so thank you all for your support xo

Tobio barely even has a chance to ask where Yamaguchi is going before the door is slamming shut and Tobio is left alone. He guesses it’s not that unusual that Yamaguchi would have plans; Yamaguchi is really nice, so he’s probably quite popular. He’s spoken about a few other friends before too, like that one girl from his course, or a few people from the art society he’s in. Tobio frowns slightly. He’s happy that Yamaguchi has other friends, but he can’t help but feel a pang of jealousy.

In all honesty, Tobio has never been good with people. He doesn’t quite understand them a lot of the time, and he’s pretty sure they don’t understand him, either. Even Yamaguchi doesn’t understand him, but he still treats Tobio kindly and tries to include him. It’s something Tobio really likes about Yamaguchi.

But still, Tobio thinks it would be really nice to meet someone who just _gets_ him. Who he doesn’t have to filter himself around (because as nice as Yamaguchi is, he doesn’t seem to appreciate Tobio’s blunt comments). Someone who sees the real Tobio and still wants to be around him.

For the second time today, Hinata enters Tobio’s thoughts unbidden. Because last night, it felt like maybe Hinata understood Tobio. Tobio’s bluntness didn’t seem to make Hinata uncomfortable; if anything, it seemed to get him fired up. Hinata didn’t back down or avoid him, instead rising to meet Tobio with the same energy. That’s never happened to Tobio before, and it was equal parts irritating and exhilarating. But Tobio is reluctant to admit this to anyone but himself.

Because Hinata is annoying. And loud, and reckless, and really not all that smart. But he’s also really funny, and forgiving, and he doesn’t get mad when Tobio calls him a dumbass, not _really_. And they _are_ on the same course, so they probably have more in common than Tobio thinks. Maybe finding someone who gets him isn’t as hard as Tobio thought. Even if that someone _is_ a moron.

-x-

When Yamaguchi finally gets back, night has fully fallen outside. Tobio looks up from where he’s watching an old volleyball match on his laptop to greet Yamaguchi, whose cheeks are flushed from the cold. He smiles widely at Tobio as he shrugs out of his coat and shoes.

“Hi, Kageyama,” he says breathlessly, already on his way to the bathroom before Tobio has a chance to reply.

Sighing softly, Tobio turns back to his laptop. He’s not sure what he expected before he started his first year at university, but rewatching volleyball matches alone on a Saturday evening was probably never part of the ideal scenario. It kinda just feels like he’s in high school again, and _that_ is a depressing thought. Fortunately, Yamaguchi emerges from the bathroom before Tobio has a chance to stew on it.

“So,” Yamaguchi starts, dropping onto his bed, “what’ve you been up to today?”

“This,” Tobio shrugs, earning a soft laugh from Yamaguchi. “You?”

Usually, when Tobio asks this, it’s more out of politeness than interest. Not that he doesn’t care about what Yamaguchi gets up to. No, it’s more that he’s not that eager to hear about what he’s missing. But Yamaguchi seemed in such a rush earlier that Tobio can’t help but be a little curious this time around.

“Ah,” Yamaguchi sighs, sinking back into his pillow. He’s grinning up at the ceiling. _Weird_. “I went to get lunch with Tsukki, then we stayed in the library for a while.”

Kageyama’s not sure why that’s making Yamaguchi grin so dopily but he nods anyway. “Cool.”

“Yeah,” Yamaguchi smiles, then turns onto his side, propping his head up in his hand and looking at Tobio. “He’s just so funny, you know? And he’s really smart, he told me so many cool facts. Like, did you know that there were, like, 700 kinds of dinosaur? How crazy is that?”

Tobio didn’t know that, but he wouldn’t really class that as a _cool_ fact. Still, Yamaguchi seems happy, so he forces out a “wow.” Yamaguchi doesn’t seem to notice Tobio’s lack of enthusiasm, but Tobio doesn’t really mind.

“Oh my God, and he was telling me about this time–” Yamaguchi cuts himself off with a snorting laugh, unable to carry on. Tobio waits patiently. Gasping, Yamaguchi tries to continue. “This time, when Hinata–” Cue more giggles.

Ears perking up at the mention of Hinata, Tobio turns his chair to fully face Yamaguchi. “Go on,” he urges.

“I can’t say it,” Yamaguchi wheezes, wiping tears from the corners of his eyes. Tobio can’t help but frown, disappointed that the information he most wanted from this conversation is just out of reach.

“I didn’t think Tsukishima was _that_ funny,” he grumbles, turning back to his laptop as Yamaguchi continues to giggle to himself.

-x-

Yamaguchi talks a lot about Tsukishima after that. From the little interaction they’ve had, Tobio can’t see what’s so great about Tsukishima, but he’s glad that Yamaguchi is happy. Unfortunately, Yamaguchi’s increased interest in Tsukishima seems to directly correlate with his decreased time spent in their dorm. What other reason does a graphic design student have to spend so much time in the humanities library? And he’s been telling Tobio a suspicious amount of ‘cool’ facts lately.

Alternatively, there hasn’t been much change to Tobio’s schedule. He still works out every morning, attends his classes, goes to practice, and spends a lot of time in the dorm. Some days hold a little variety, like when Miwa calls unexpectedly to ask how he’s doing, or when a particularly challenging assignment requires him to visit the science library. However, this week has passed by almost identically to the ones before it.

Except this week he’s seen Hinata a lot. Turns out that they have a lot of the same classes. Tobio can’t believe how little he’d noticed Hinata before, but now he seems to be everywhere Tobio looks. A couple of times, Hinata has caught him looking across the crowd and offered him that sunshine grin and an exaggerated wave, but Tobio always managed to talk himself out of going over there and talking to him. 

Hinata seems to be one of those people who is friends with everyone, and that intimidates Tobio, so he settles for flashing an awkward smile and shuffling away. Sometimes he thinks he catches Hinata’s smile falter as he turns away, but that’s probably just a trick of the light.

Now it’s Friday again, and Tobio is trying to make sense of what the professor is reciting about the psychology of exercise when suddenly the lecture is coming to an end and people are filtering out of the lecture hall. Tobio curses quietly to himself, pissed that he always seems to miss half of what’s said. He’s packing away his laptop and wondering how he’s going to pass the year at this rate when a familiar head of orange hair appears in the seat beside him.

“That didn’t make any sense to you either, did it?”

Hinata almost sounds hopeful in his question, like he’s praying that he’s not alone in his struggle. Tobio snorts a humourless laugh, stuffing his textbook into his backpack with a little more force than necessary.

“Not one bit.”

“Okay,” Hinata sighs with a grin. “That makes me feel a little better. At least we can be stupid together!”

“I probably still understood more of it than you,” Tobio snaps back, defensive with his already-wounded pride.

“Well you won’t mind helping me study then, will you?” Hinata bites back without hesitation, amber eyes boring into Tobio with intensity.

The frown falls from Tobio’s face in his surprise, taken aback by the fact that Hinata apparently wants to hang out with him despite his prickly attitude. He just nods in response, and Hinata’s grin returns smoothly.

“Good,” he chirps, rising from his seat and turning expectantly toward Tobio. “’Coz Tsukishima’s banned me from our room so he can watch lame documentaries with Yamaguchi.”

Tobio didn’t know that Yamaguchi had plans, but he’ll probably find a text confirming it when he checks his phone. He frowns.

“How can he ban you from your own room?”

“He is evil, Kageyama,” Hinata says solemnly, “and evil people should not be blessed with such height and strength.” He shakes his head, sighing. “It gives them too much power over the rest of us.”

Hinata sounds so serious that Tobio almost laughs. But there’s a question burning in the back of his throat, and while he doesn’t want to ask it he doesn’t think he can help himself.

“And you don’t have any other plans?” Hinata just blinks at him in confusion. “I mean,” he starts to elaborate, avoiding eye contact. “It’s Friday, and you must have lots of friends inviting you to things.” _So why would you want to hang out with me?_ This last question goes unspoken, but Tobio thinks maybe Hinata somehow hears it anyway.

“No other plans,” Hinata says casually, but his lopsided grin makes Tobio’s stomach jolt a bit. Hinata doesn’t seem to notice. “Now would you come on? I’m starving.”

-x-

They stop at the campus shop for snacks before heading to Tobio and Yamaguchi’s dorm. They didn’t even talk about it; it seemed obvious that things wouldn’t end well if they ended up in the library together. So they make the short walk, Tobio carrying the bag of junk food while Hinata chews on gummies. Tobio stops outside his dorm building, Hinata close behind.

“Woah,” Hinata breathes, “we actually live really close together, you know.”

“Oh yeah?” Tobio says passively as he scans them in. He’d kind of assumed they would, with the layout of the first year dorms, but Hinata seems awestruck by the realisation. _Dumbass_.

“Yeah, weird, right?” Hinata grins around the gummy he’s chewing.

Tobio just rolls his eyes as they make their way up the stairs towards the dorm. There’s a kind of nervous energy settled in his stomach at the thought of Hinata seeing his room. He’s not sure why; Hinata seems like he’d be a pretty untidy person, so he probably won’t judge. And Tobio’s pretty neat anyway. Yamaguchi too, mostly. But the energy swirls in his gut regardless.

The door is barely open before Hinata is barrelling in, almost knocking Tobio off his feet.

“So which one’s your bed?” he asks from where he stands in between the two. Tobio points to the one that’s neatly made, and Hinata apparently takes that as an invitation to plop himself down on it. “Nice sheets,” he comments off-handedly, shoving another few gummies in his mouth.

“Um, thanks,” is all Tobio can think to reply, still toeing his shoes off by the door. Hinata is bright eyed, taking in the room as his legs swing off the side of the bed. Then the swinging stops, and he jumps to his feet and bounds over to Tobio’s desk.

“Woah, you like volleyball?” he exclaims, holding up one of the many magazines on Tobio’s desk.

“Yeah,” Tobio responds, eyes narrowing in suspicion. Because what does it matter to Hinata?

“Me too!” he beams up at Tobio. “What position? Do you play here? Which team are you on?”

Blinking owlishly, Tobio just stares at Hinata for a second while he processes all of the questions. Hinata seems to have gotten closer to Tobio while he was asking them, standing on his tiptoes in front of him and staring up at him with intense amber eyes.

“Um, setter,” he mumbles. “2nd team.” He’s not sure why he feels embarrassed, but he does.

“Gaaaah! 2nd team?!” Hinata wails, taking a step back from Tobio and looking at him incredulously. “So unfair!” He moves back to Tobio’s bed to flop onto his back with an exaggerated sigh. “I’m on the 5th team. No one else there even takes it seriously. No one takes _me_ seriously.”

Tobio stands in the middle of the room looking down at Hinata, entirely unsure of what to do with himself. Is he supposed to comfort Hinata? He doesn’t want to sit on the bed and be too close, but will he be too far away if he sits at his desk? He almost feels like smoke is going to pour from his ears when Hinata sits up with a gasp, a virtually visible light bulb flicking on above his head.

“You should give me tosses, Kageyama!”

He really doesn’t mean to, but Tobio frowns. Seeing this, Hinata frowns right back.

“Oh, you don’t think I could hit your almighty 2nd team tosses? Well I could, Kageyama! I bet I could hit them super good!”

“It’s super _well_ , dumbass,” Kageyama barks back without thinking.

“OH YEAH?” Hinata bellows. “How ‘bout I show you just how _well_ I can spike?!”

“Bring it ON!”


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Got this chapter done a little early and wanted to share! Thank u again to the hq discord server for forcing me to actually write lol, couldn't do it without y'all.  
> I've also realised how much I love writing this AU so uuuuhhh strap in guys coz we're in it for the long haul!  
> Anyway, happy reading!

How long do you have to know someone before you can officially call them a friend? Kei likes to have set rules, to have a solid time-frame so that he can be as accurate as possible in describing his relationships. Because at this time, exactly a week from the day he met Yamaguchi, he would like to think of him as a friend. But he really doesn’t want to be premature or inaccurate.

If it were completely up to him, Kei would have labeled Yamaguchi a friend that first night, when he’d made Kei feel less like a lonely wallflower and more like an active participant in his own story. By now he would ideally be labelling Yamaguchi a best friend, because who else would he be this eager to spend so much time with?

They’re sitting in Kei’s thankfully Hinata-free dorm, side-by-side on his bed, backs to the wall and feet dangling over the side. It’s the first time Yamaguchi’s been to his room, and maybe he’d be nervous if Yamaguchi wasn’t Yamaguchi; because while Yamaguchi certainly has the capacity to be judgy as all hell, there’s never any malice there. And really, Kei thinks that Yamaguchi is just as happy to be here as Kei is to have him here. So they’ll just ignore the mess creeping over from Hinata’s side of the room and eat their fries.

“That’s kinda creepy,” Yamaguchi comments, nodding towards the documentary that plays on Kei’s laptop between them. “I don’t like black holes,” he mumbles around the fry he’s folding into his mouth.

“You’d be immediately reduced to ash if you went anywhere near one, so it’s probably best you don’t like them,” Kei says, swirling his strawberry milkshake in his hand.

“Well  _ that’s  _ horrifying,” Yamaguchi declares, turning to fix Kei with an alarmed look.

Kei smirks back, sipping on his milkshake and turning back towards the screen.

Things have been like this all week; easy and comfortable. Kei’s not even sure how they ended up spending so much time together. It’s like one day they were getting lunch, then suddenly they were messaging every day, then making plans like they’d known each other for years. Kei thinks he would have loved to know Yamaguchi for years. He wonders how different he’d be if he had.

“Except it wouldn’t  _ feel  _ instant, because time works differently inside black holes.”

“Tsukki, would you shut up?”

Kei grins. “Sorry, Yamaguchi.”

-x-

“Kei!” Akiteru’s voice comes from Kei’s phone and loudly into his ear. Kei winces. “You finally picked up!”

“Yes, well,” Kei says in the particular brand of monotone he reserves solely for Akiteru. “You make yourself hard to ignore.”

“You’re so cold, Kei,” Akiteru chuckles down the line. “I wanna know how you’re doing! Ryuu talks to Saeko every week, you know.”

“Ryuunosuke is a degenerate and Saeko is an enabler.”

“Kei!”

Kei sighs. Akiteru is a good brother, really. They used to be close – well, as close as siblings can be when there’s a 5 year age gap, – but growing older meant growing apart. Then when Akiteru left for university, Kei was alone. He told himself he liked it that way, but it wasn’t true – he can admit that now. In all honesty, Kei does miss Akiteru; he just doesn’t have the emotional eloquence to express it.

“I’m doing fine.”

“Come on, dude,” Akiteru pushes. “You gotta give me a little more than that.”

Another sigh. “Everything’s good. My classes are fine.” He pauses, unsure of how to go on.

_ “Aaaand?” _

As if he is deflating, Kei sighs once more. It’s like Akiteru sees right through him. Kei thinks maybe that’s why he struggles to be upfront with his brother. It’s hard to be honest when it’s your only choice. But he thinks he ought to try.

“I made a friend.”

Akiteru pauses for a second, and Kei knows exactly what he’s thinking.  _ You’ve been at university for over a month and you’ve only made one friend?  _ He also knows that Akiteru isn’t surprised by this. Maybe just a little sad.

“That’s awesome, Kei!” Akiteru’s voice is enthusiastic regardless, and Kei can tell it isn’t forced; Akiteru really is happy for him. “You must really like them if you’re telling  _ me _ about them.”

“Mmm,” Kei hums in agreement, then finds his attention drifting as Akiteru starts to tell him about his week.

Kei  _ does _ really like Yamaguchi. More than he’s liked anyone, actually. And that’s kind of terrifying, because what does it  _ mean _ ? Being around Yamaguchi is like finally sleeping in your own bed after being away for weeks; it’s warm, and it’s comfortable, and it feels  _ right _ .

But is that how people feel about their friends? For not the first time in his life, Kei wishes he’d had more friends growing up, but this time his reasons are different. This time, all he wants is a frame of reference. Because how else is he to know if he just really likes Yamaguchi as a friend, or as something more?

Kei’s known that he was gay since high school, so that part’s not a surprise. And sure, Yamaguchi is attractive. The golden brown of his skin is the perfect backdrop for his myriad of freckles, and when he pulls his long, shaggy hair up into that cute little ponytail Kei’s heart stutters a little bit. But being attracted to Yamaguchi isn’t the same as  _ liking  _ him.

Usually, Kei wouldn’t be too bothered about making this distinction in his mind. After all, his desire to be around most people is tentative at best, and most attraction he’s felt has been fickle and fleeting. Not that he’s ever actually acted on it. Ever. But it seems important to figure out what he feels for Yamaguchi, because whatever is growing between them feels too important to mess up.

The slamming of the dorm room door jolts Kei out of his thoughts, and he uses it as an excuse to say his goodbyes to Akiteru and hang up.

“You didn’t have to hang up because of me,” Hinata says as he unwinds his scarf and kicks off his shoes.

“I assure you, nothing I ever do is for your benefit,” Kei snarks back, earning himself a whine from Hinata.

“I don’t know why anyone would wanna speak to you anyway,” Hinata huffs as he drops onto his bed, outer layer successfully shed.

“Neither do I, but it seems to keep happening.” Kei turns back to his laptop, hoping that Hinata will sense that this is the end of the conversation. Hinata never has been that good with hints, though.

“I really don’t know why Yamaguchi likes you so much,” he says, and Kei whips his head around to stare at him. Hinata doesn’t notice, engrossed in whatever is on his phone screen.

“And how would  _ you  _ know if he does?”

“Kageyama told me,” Hinata replies casually, eyes still on his phone. “Says he talks about you a lot and Kageyama doesn’t get why.” He finally looks up from his phone, eyes locking steadily with Kei’s. “As much as I hate to agree with Kageyama, I don’t get it either.”

The heat rising up Kei’s neck could be from embarrassment or annoyance, both of which he’s currently feeling in equal measure. He turns back to his laptop, hoping that Hinata hasn’t noticed the colour climbing up his skin.

“Well I don’t know why you spend so much time with Kageyama,” Kei bites back, trying to keep his voice even. “All you two do is argue.”

“We have healthy debate and competition,” Hinata recites as if he’s rehearsed the line multiple times in front of a mirror. “And he can be funny sometimes. Usually when he’s not trying to.”

“I’m sure your combined stupidity can be very entertaining.” Kei makes a show of typing something out, if only to look like he’s uninterested. “Now, do you plan on staying here all evening? Because if so I’m going to the library.”

“Yes, I’m staying here!” Hinata declares. “I  _ live  _ here. You can’t keep kicking me out whenever you feel like it!”

“I’m not kicking you out, idiot,” Kei says, already gathering his things from his desk into his satchel. “I’m kicking myself out.”

He’s careless as he leaves, knowing he’s probably forgetting something but desperate to be alone for even just a second. As the door clicks behind him, he lets out a deep breath.  _ Yamaguchi talks about him a lot.  _ That information makes his chest seize as he remembers it. Should your heart clench at the thought of your friend? Pointless question, seeing as Kei doesn’t know the answer.

Walking slowly down the hall, Kei pulls out his phone. It’s just past 8pm, a Wednesday. Yamaguchi isn’t usually one for late nights in the library, especially not on weeknights, but Kei really wants to see him. He taps out the message as he makes his way carefully down the stairs.

**Are you busy tonight?**

He hates how he stares at the screen, waiting for those little bubbles to show that Yamaguchi is typing. They don’t immediately pop up, so Kei locks his phone and slows his already sluggish pace. The air is frigid but crisp, a picturesque November night. The chill reminds Kei that he forgot his scarf again. He really needs to be more careful about that; even Hinata remembers to wrap up, and if Kei were to get sick through his own forgetfulness he would never forgive himself.

He knows he should probably walk faster to increase his body heat, but he’s still hoping that Yamaguchi might want to meet him. They don’t even have to go to the library – Kei doesn’t get much done when they’re there together anyway. His phone lights up in his hand and he unlocks it automatically.

**nope!**

**wanna hang out?? 👀**

A tiny smile pulls at Kei’s lips. They probably wouldn’t have ended up friends if not for Yamaguchi’s head-first attitude. It’s something that Kei really likes about him; where Kei is reserved, Yamaguchi is unabashed. The overthinker that he is, Kei doesn’t know if he would’ve ever worked up the nerve to invite Yamaguchi to lunch that day. Luckily, he didn’t have to.

**Yes. Library?**

A cold breeze reminds Kei that he’s been standing still for a little too long. He hopes Yamaguchi replies quickly this time, because the brisk autumn air is easily permeating his clothes and sending shivers throughout his entire body. Thankfully, the response is fast, but it doesn’t hold exactly what Kei was hoping for.

😒😐😔😪

Kei sighs something between an incredulous laugh and an irritated huff.

**Yamaguchi, please use your words.**

**i’m sick of the library tsukki! 😭**

**Then where do you propose?**

The sound of movement close by pulls Kei’s attention from his phone screen. Looking up, he unexpectedly comes face-to-face with a warmly-wrapped Kageyama. Kageyama looks like a deer caught in headlights, wide eyes staring unblinkingly into Kei’s.

“Hinata said you were going to the library,” he says, the words muffled by his tightly-wound scarf.

“I’m waiting for Yamaguchi,” Kei says back, eyes narrowing. So Hinata had barely waited for Kei to leave the room before inviting Kageyama over. Not that Kei has the right to complain; he  _ did  _ hide Hinata’s keys and lock him out so that he and Yamaguchi could watch their documentary undisturbed. But  _ still _ .

“Okay,” Kageyama replies, shifting on his feet and glancing in the direction of Kei and Hinata’s dorm building. “Um, bye.”

Kei watches as Kageyama dashes off, breaking into a slow jog as he retreats. With a sigh, Kei unlocks his phone, already knowing what Yamaguchi’s message is going to say.

**come over to my room!**

**kageyama just left ✨**

He doesn’t bother replying, locking his phone and making his way towards Yamaguchi’s building.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi friends! Work's been crazy so I kept forgetting to post this lol, oopsie. Shout out to Cody for successfully guessing what happens in this chapter, u a real one bro.  
> Happy reading!!

It’s like the stars have aligned for Tadashi. Just as Kageyama left, he got a message from Tsukishima asking if he was busy. Everything just fell into place, and now Tadashi is dashing around his room, making sure there’s nothing embarrassing on show. Once he’s happy with the state of the room, he doesn’t sit back down, consumed by a restless, nervous energy.

They’ve spent so much time together in the library, but the only time they’ve been really _alone_ together was when Tadashi went to Tsukishima’s dorm to watch some documentary Tsukishima had been gushing about, and that was...something.

Well, it _wasn’t,_ but sitting side by side on Tsukishima’s bed with the laptop between them and the lights out had _felt_ like something to Tadashi. It had felt like something that Tadashi would like to do a lot, but the thought of doing so is still nerve-wracking. Because Tsukishima is _different_ when it’s just the two of them.

Tadashi had noticed it at the party, how Tsukishima seemed more tense and less expressive when others were near them. It’s the same when they’re in the library; it’s like the presence of other people makes him put his guard up, even if those other people aren’t even paying attention to him.

But when they were sitting there, shoulders almost touching on Tsukishima’s twin bed, that guard was down. He had let himself smile, and laugh, and openly marvel as the wonders of the universe unravelled on the laptop screen before them. The sparkle in Tsukishima’s eyes as he had watched the galaxies unfold had made Tadashi’s stomach twist.

His stomach is twisting now, except this time it’s far less pleasant. Because Tsukishima is going to be _here_ , in Tadashi’s room, and they’re going to be properly alone again, and Tadashi isn’t sure if his heart can take any more of the unguarded Tsukishima. As if Tadashi doesn’t already have a hard enough time stopping himself from blurting out how pretty he thinks Tsukishima is on a regular basis. This crush is getting to be a nuisance.

The knock at the door has Tadashi jumping out of his skin. He takes a second to calm himself – and to not look too eager, – before answering the door.

Tsukishima is shivering on the other side of it, losing height as he hunches in on himself.

“Tsukki!” Tadashi gasps, automatically wrapping his arms around Tsukishima and pulling him into the room, hands rubbing quick circles on his back in an attempt to warm him up.

Tsukishima just lets him, huffing out a sigh that brushes warmly past the shell of Tadashi’s ear and sends goosebumps down his arms. If Tsukishima notices when Tadashi squeezes him just a tiny bit tighter, he doesn’t show it.

“What’re you doing, going out there dressed like this?” Tadashi asks, concern evident in his voice as he continues to try and infuse some warmth into Tsukishima.

“You don’t live that far from my building,” Tsukishima mumbles. Tadashi tuts at his avoidance of the question.

“Far enough for you to get sick,” Tadashi scolds, pulling back to look Tsukishima in the eye. “And the library’s even farther, Tsukki.”

“I’m fine,” Tsukishima protests, prompting Tadashi to raise an unimpressed eyebrow at him.

“Get under the blanket,” Tadashi orders, pushing Tsukishima lightly towards the bed. “I’m going to make tea.”

When Tadashi returns with two mugs of honey lemon, Tsukishima is sitting cross-legged on Tadashi’s bed, Tadashi’s duvet draped over his shoulders. His nose is still pink from the cold, and Tadashi has to bite his lip to ground himself and stop himself from going right over there and kissing it. Instead, he hands Tsukishima his tea and receives his grumbled “thanks”.

There’s an awkward second where Tadashi just hovers, unsure of whether to join Tsukishima on the bed or not. As if in response to Tadashi’s hesitation, Tsukishima wordlessly lifts the duvet with his arm, a silent invitation for Tadashi to join him in his cocoon. So Tadashi does, hoping that Tsukishima doesn’t notice the blush that he’s sure he’s sporting.

Their arms press together from shoulder to elbow as they shuffle closer to sit comfortably under the duvet. It’s already warm from Tsukishima’s body heat, and Tadashi feels his heartbeat quicken. His hands grip his mug on his lap, squeezed tight to prevent him from doing something he might regret.

“Thank you for the tea,” Tsukishima murmurs, bringing the mug up to his face. The steam fogs up his glasses, and Tadashi’s chest lurches, because _how cute can one man be?_

“It– it’s fine,” he stutters out. _Take a deep breath._ “I just wish you’d take better care of yourself, Tsukki.”

Tsukishima sighs, looking at Tadashi from the corner of his eye. “It’s not a big deal. I’ll be fine.”

Tadashi just shakes his head and takes a sip of his tea. He’s learned by now that Tsukishima is stubborn, so he won’t waste his time arguing. The quiet settles around them like a second blanket, both of them content to drink their tea in silence. Their combined warmth soothes Tadashi’s bones, and he finds his eyelids growing heavy. Just as his brain is beginning to feel fuzzy, Tsukishima speaks.

“Yamaguchi, your tea.”

Eyes opening and regaining focus, Tadashi looks down to see that his hold on his mug has grown lax, and the liquid within has gotten dangerously close to overflowing into his lap.

“Ah!” he exclaims, righting the mug and rubbing his free hand down his face.

“I can leave if you need to sleep.” Tsukishima is looking at Tadashi with an unreadable expression, and Tadashi suddenly feels terrible.

“No!” he rushes out. “Don’t go.” He can feel his cheeks growing warm but he doesn’t stop. “I was just super comfortable...” he trails off with a nervous chuckle.

“I see,” Tsukishima responds, raising his mug back up to his lips. Tadashi thinks he can make out a faint flush on Tsukishima’s cheeks, and the thought of having made Tsukishima uncomfortable makes his own blush deepen.

“Sorry,” he coughs out awkwardly, hunching in on himself in an attempt to increase the space between their bodies.

Tsukishima clears his throat, then leans over to nudge Tadashi with his shoulder. “You have no need to be sorry.”

When Tadashi looks across at him, Tsukishima’s gaze is focused on the tea in his mug, his cheeks an undeniable pink. Tadashi feels his insides turn to mush, and he can’t help the grin that stretches over his face.

“Okay,” he says softly, letting himself relax into Tsukishima’s side again. “Want to watch something?”

“Okay.”

-x-

It feels like Tadashi spends his whole life in this library. That in itself should be enough to make him feel even a little ashamed, given that he doesn’t _actually_ study humanities and only comes here to spend time with Tsukishima. In fact, if the university didn’t allow digital art students to install the necessary programs to their personal computers, Tadashi would probably get absolutely no work done outside of class.

Today is a Tuesday, one like any other, where Tadashi and Tsukishima meet up in the library during their coincidental free period around lunch. The only thing that makes it different to any other Tuesday is that this one is Tadashi’s birthday.

His phone hasn’t stopped buzzing all morning, and Tadashi can tell that Tsukishima is becoming curious. He’s not even sure why he hasn’t told Tsukishima yet; he supposes the subject just hasn’t come up, and he doesn’t want to be the one to raise it.

“Okay, but if you _had_ to choose,” Tadashi probes, grinning, “would you marry Hinata or Kageyama?” Tadashi has to bite his lip to hold in his laughter as Tsukishima’s face scrunches into a disgusted scowl. He’s still tapping away on his laptop, eyes on his screen as he answers.

“That’s like asking if I’d prefer to die by rabies or by snake bite. I simply would rather not die.” He glances up at Tadashi, fingers still typing. “Unless I’m married to one of those two, in which case dying is the preferable option.”

Tadashi lets himself laugh now, earning him a smirk from Tsukishima. The prolonged buzz of Tadashi’s phone on the table grabs both of their attention. With an awkward apology to Tsukishima, Tadashi answers the call.

“Happy birthday, Tadashi!!” comes his mother’s high-pitched squeal from the other end of the line. Tadashi wonders if it was loud enough for Tsukishima to hear, and feels his cheeks heat up at the thought.

“Thanks, mum,” he mumbles shyly down the phone. “I’m kind of busy right n–”

“I know, Bubble,” she interrupts, “you’re a very busy university student.” He can hear the smile in her voice, and can’t help but smile back. “I just got a break at work and wanted to hear your voice. I miss you, you know.” She sighs softly, and Tadashi’s heart squeezes. “It’s the first birthday we’ve not spent together.” There’s a bittersweetness there, and Tadashi aches as he thinks of her waking up alone in their house every day.

“I miss you too, mum,” is all he says, hoping that it’s enough. “I’ll call you back later, okay?”

“Okay, Bubble,” she replies. “I love you.”

“Love you too, mum. Bye.”

As he hangs up, he thinks he notices the sound of Tsukishima’s typing grow louder, as if with renewed purpose. Tsukishima’s eyes are glued resolutely to his screen, so Tadashi doesn’t bother him and instead turns back to his own laptop. The click of their keys in the only sound between them for a while, until Tsukishima speaks.

“You didn’t tell me it was your birthday,” he says evenly, eyes not leaving his screen but fingers slowing their tapping. It isn’t a question, but Tadashi still feels the need to justify himself.

“Oh, um..” Tadashi hesitates. “I guess I didn’t think it was that important?”

“I see.”

Tsukishima’s face is still completely blank, looking at his screen instead of Tadashi, and Tadashi gets the sense that that’s all that Tsukishima is going to say on the subject. They return to their work in silence, and Tadashi can’t help but wonder if he’s somehow upset Tsukishima.

“So which one would you marry?” Tsukishima asks, and Tadashi is caught entirely off-guard, looking up to see Tsukishima regarding him with a neutral expression.

“What?” Tadashi asks, brain still lagging.

Tsukishima makes a _tsk_ sound. “Out of the two idiots. Which would you marry, if you had to choose?”

“Oh!” Tadashi exclaims, a grin finding its way onto his face, and he forgets instantly about the phone call and his birthday, happy to just talk about nonsense with Tsukishima.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Important info: Yamaguchi's mum is actually 100% based on my mum and THAT's why she's cute af.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heh, I like this chapter. Hope you guys do too!!!!! xoxo

Yamaguchi answers the phone, and Kei tries as hard as he can _not_ to listen, but Yamaguchi’s phone has been going crazy all day, and while Yamaguchi has friends he’s not _that_ popular, is he? So Kei fixes his eyes on his screen and keeps up the act of working while he strains his ears to try and hear what’s being said.

“Happy birthday, Tadashi!!” he hears faintly, and his brain pauses for a second.

Now he doesn’t have to pretend to type as he rushes to open up Facebook and pull up Yamaguchi’s profile. And there it is. Today is Yamaguchi’s birthday. Kei wonders why Yamaguchi didn’t say anything. Did he expect Kei to know? Well, the information _is_ right there on Facebook, but Kei doesn’t even use it that much. He regrets that choice right now, hoping that Yamaguchi doesn’t take his ignorance as intentional. When Yamaguchi gets off the phone, Kei tries to bring it up as casually as possible.

“You didn’t tell me it was your birthday.”

“Oh, um...I guess I didn’t think it was that important?” Yamaguchi seems shy as he says this, eyes lowered and shoulders bunched high around his ears. Kei feels even worse.

“I see.”

This won’t do. It’s Yamaguchi’s first year at university, and he deserves to have a proper birthday, not just to spend it in the library with Kei. The cogs start to grind in Kei’s brain, and he feels the beginnings of a plan begin to form. But he wants it to be a surprise, so he tries to act naturally, ignoring the way his stomach twists when Yamaguchi finally smiles again.

-x-

“Hinata.”

Hinata’s head whips up from whatever magazine he’s reading on his bed, his eyes wide with surprise and, possibly, fear. “What?”

“I need your help,” Kei says, and Hinata squints at him like this is some sort of trick. Kei sighs.

He wishes it was a trick, and that he didn’t need Hinata’s help to pull this plan off, but it isn’t, and he does. He keeps reminding himself that it’s all for Yamaguchi; it’s all worth it to make Yamaguchi happy. For now, he’s not going to look into why it’s so important to him that Yamaguchi celebrates his birthday properly. That kind of introspection can wait until...well, he’s not sure when. Later.

“Well, actually I need Kageyama’s help, but it involves you too,” he clarifies. This has Hinata’s full attention.

“Wait a minute, you’re serious?” Hinata asks, face still disbelieving.

“Yes.” Hinata still looks skeptical, and Kei feels the need to justify himself. “It’s for Yamaguchi.”

Hinata raises his eyebrows. “Oh?”

“Today is his birthday and he hasn’t got any plans to celebrate it. I want to do something for him this weekend, but I...” Kei pauses. This is hard to admit, especially to Hinata, but he makes himself say it. “I don’t know any of his other friends. I was hoping Kageyama could help with that.” He swallows, not liking how his next words taste in his mouth but forcing them out regardless. “And I wanted to invite the two of you.”

Kei looks at Hinata, waiting for a response, and sees only wide eyes and a dropped jaw. This irritates him, but he stays silent. He really needs Hinata to agree. Eventually, Hinata does speak.

“You must really like Yamaguchi,” is all he says, and Kei feels his cheeks instantly grow hot.

“That’s beside the point,” he deflects, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose in an attempt to hide his blush. “Will you help or not?”

“Well, what kind of thing did you have in mind?”

As Kei pitches his idea, Hinata’s face lights up, smile growing wide and eyes sparkling.

“You can count us in,” he assures, and Kei thinks that this whole thing might just work out.

-x-

Kei would be a liar to say that leaving such a big chunk of the planning in Hinata’s hands _doesn’t_ have him on edge, but so far things seem to be on track. Better still, Yamaguchi appears to be none the wiser to their plans.

As Friday rolls around, there’s an anxiety in Kei’s chest. Tomorrow is the big day, and every time Kei has asked Hinata how his side of the preparations have gone, all he gets is a vague response, a “don’t worry,” an “everything will be fine!”. For the sake of his health, Kei is forcing himself to stay calm. It _will_ be fine, and whatever happens, Yamaguchi will appreciate their effort. He’ll appreciate _Kei’s_ effort.

But Kei doesn’t just want it to be fine. He wants Yamaguchi to have the time of his life. He wants Yamaguchi to smile in that way that he does, where it’s bright and genuine and almost too wide. He wants Yamaguchi to laugh like he does when they’re alone, where he doesn’t feel the need to cover his mouth with his hand and instead throws his head back and lets his laughter burst free. He wants Yamaguchi to know that his birthday _is_ important. That _he_ is important.

Staying focused on his only class of the day is difficult but he manages it, and soon enough he’s on his way back to his dorm, foregoing his usual library session. For once, he’s hoping Hinata will be home, just so they can properly go over the plan. The fact that he’s willing – one could even call him eager, – to see Hinata just because there’s the possibility that it will make Yamaguchi happy causes an alarm to go off in Kei’s head, but he shushes it. Later, he can think about that later.

When he pushes open the door to his room, he expects to be met with the sight of a fluffy orange head somewhere inside. However, he is met only with an empty room, looking exactly the same as it had when he’d left it this morning. Of course; Hinata is probably still in class. Well, may as well take advantage of the rare moment of quiet and get some work done.

Slowly, Kei unpacks his satchel, setting his laptop on his desk and dropping into the desk chair. He takes a minute to close his eyes and just breathe. It feels like he hasn’t had a moment alone in a long time.

Since the start of Kei’s friendship with Yamaguchi, he’s found that a lot of his previously solitary time now includes another person. And, despite himself, Kei _loves_ that, he _loves_ that he’s found a person who’s company he enjoys so much. But that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t still appreciate a bit of alone time.

So he pulls up his notes, settles his headphones around his ears, and makes the most of the peace.

Time passes in an easy blur, and soon enough Kei’s attention is dragged from his work by the sound of the door slamming. He absently checks the time. Almost 1pm.

“Oh!” comes Hinata’s voice from by the door. “I thought you’d be in the library,” Hinata huffs as he unwraps his scarf and shrugs out of his coat.

“Hmm,” Kei hums noncommittally, schooling his face to appear casual and unbothered before swiveling his chair to face Hinata. “Have you and Kageyama organised what you need to for tomorrow?” He keeps his eyes steady on Hinata, who suddenly – and worryingly – looks like a deer caught in headlights, frozen in his state of half-undress.

“Um,” he hesitates, and Kei can’t help but narrow his eyes. “Yeah, it’s all sorted. You can quit worrying, Tsukishima.”

Kei barely gets a chance to respond before Hinata is bundling back into his outdoor clothes and mumbling about how he’d forgotten about a “thing” he had to do and needs to go back out. The door is almost shutting behind him when he pops his head back into the room.

“Oh! You should invite Yamaguchi to stay here tonight,” he suggests, making Kei’s face crease in confusion. “It’ll make things easier for tomorrow! Plus, Kageyama said I can only stay at his when Yamaguchi is out, so it’d be a win-win,” he shrugs. “Anyway, bye!” he calls, and then the door is slamming shut behind him.

Stunned by the strangeness of the encounter, Kei can barely collect his thoughts. Firstly, Hinata had clearly forgotten his role in their plans. However, Kei can’t manage to be annoyed, the thought of inviting Yamaguchi over for the night at the forefront of his mind. Even the fact that the arrangement would benefit Hinata doesn’t deter him. Without further hesitation, he pulls up his chat window with Yamaguchi.

**Would you like to stay over at my dorm tonight?**

**omg sleepover!! 😍😃**

**i’d love to tsukki!!! ✨**

-x-

Yamaguchi shows up at Kei’s around 7pm, as they had agreed. Hinata is long gone, having popped back into their dorm with Kageyama in tow just after 5pm to grab his stuff and then head straight to Kageyama’s. Kei considers how funny it is that Hinata and Kageyama seem to get on so well, even if it’s not obvious to observers. And their unlikely friendship made tonight’s sleepover with Yamaguchi possible, so Kei can’t complain.

“Hinata was with Kageyama at our dorm before I set off to come here,” Yamaguchi says as he kicks off his shoes. “Said I could have his bed tonight. Nice, right?”

“Not really,” Kei replies, scrunching up his nose. “He hasn’t washed those sheets since we got here.”

“Oh,” Yamaguchi laughs breathily, making his way into the room and dropping his bag onto Kei’s bed. “I guess the floor it is, then.”

He’s grinning, digging through his rucksack intently. Kei sits on his bed beside the bag and leans in to see what Yamaguchi’s looking for. It’s then that Yamaguchi pulls out a brown glass bottle. Kei squints, recognising the label.

“Kahlua?” he asks, looking up at Yamaguchi with a quirked eyebrow.

“Aha, yeah,” Yamaguchi chuckles nervously. “I remembered that you liked it, and well...” He pauses for a second, turning to Kei with a sheepish look on his face. “I thought you might like a belated birthday drink with me. It’s okay if not though!”

“Do you even like Kahlua?” is all Kei can ask, absolutely bowled over. It was _Yamaguchi’s_ birthday, yet he brought _Kei_ a gift? Kei is unsure of how this managed to surprise him; because _of course_ he did. This is classic Yamaguchi. Kei fights a smile.

“Eh,” Yamaguchi answers vaguely with a shrug. Then he extends the bottle towards Kei. “Hope you’ve got milk!”

They get through most of the bottle between them with ease, throwing effortless banter back and forth as they drink. Kei thinks that he probably drinks more than Yamaguchi; he gets through his drinks quickly, enjoying the taste of the coffee liqueur evidently far more than Yamaguchi does.

“I think Kageyama likes Hinata,” Yamaguchi says, his voice mostly even despite the alcohol.

“I’d expect so,” Kei snarks. “They do spend a lot of time together, even if most of it is spent arguing.”

“ _Tsukkiiii,_ ” Yamaguchi whines lightly, cheeks rosy as he smiles. “I mean I think he _likes_ him, you know?”

“Oh really?” Kei responds, careful to keep his voice neutral. He wonders how Yamaguchi feels about the idea of his roommate being attracted to men. Knowing Yamaguchi, this will be a non-issue, but Kei doesn’t want to give anything away before he knows for _sure._ “Is he that way inclined?”

A questioning crease appears between Yamaguchi’s eyebrows for a second, his smile incredulous. The look disappears as he takes a swig of his quickly depleting drink. “Well, he hasn’t _said_ as much, but sometimes he blushes when Hinata insults him and I can’t see any reason for that other than a crush.” Kei huffs a short laugh through his nose at that. Yamaguchi continues.

“It’s their whole dynamic actually,” he says thoughtfully. “They’re like a married couple. But like, if children could get married. They’re like married toddlers.” He nods after this last statement, pleased with his conclusion, and Kei can’t help but laugh.

“I see,” he chuckles. “So their bickering is just metaphorical pigtail pulling?”

“Hmm, something like that,” he replies solemnly, and Kei laughs again, downing the rest of his drink. Yamaguchi swirls his own drink in his hand and smirks at Kei. “Do you know if Hinata is, how was it you put it? ‘That way inclined’?”

Kei shrugs, staring into his empty glass. “I’ve never asked.” He hesitates, wondering if he should say more. Should he? Would it change anything? He throws caution to the wind. “I am, though.”

“You’re what?” Yamaguchi asks, taking a short sip.

“That way inclined.” A beat of silence. “I’m gay,” he clarifies. He’s still looking into his cup, hoping that he appears indifferent. As if Yamaguchi isn’t the only person he’s _actually_ told who hasn’t known him since he was 12.

“Oh!” Yamaguchi exclaims, and Kei finally looks up at him. Yamaguchi’s cheeks are tinted pink, and he won’t meet Kei’s eye. “That’s cool,” he says, absently swilling the mouthful of his drink still left in the glass. “Um, I’m bi. Bisexual, I mean.”

“Oh,” Kei echoes. He’s hyper aware of the way that this information makes his heart skip, and his stomach clench, and his skin prickle with goosebumps. He tries to steady his breathing before saying any more. _God,_ what he wouldn’t give for another drink. “Good to know.”

Wait a minute. Why did he say that? _Why did he say that?_ It isn’t a lie; Kei thinks that this information is _very_ good to know. Knowing it has given him very useful insight into his feelings for Yamaguchi, such as making him realise that he _has_ them. Fantastic really, _but did he have to say it?_

He forces himself to look at Yamaguchi in an effort to seem as normal as possible. Kei almost jumps when he finds Yamaguchi already looking back, their eyes locking for a long second before Yamaguchi pointedly looks away. His cheeks are still pink, and Kei thinks that his probably match.

Yamaguchi bites his lip, looking into his almost empty cup for a moment before seemingly remembering where he is and knocking the last of his drink back.

“Oh, um. We’re out of Kahlua,” he points out with a weak laugh. “I’m, uh, gonna get some water. You want any?”

He’s already up and across the room before Kei manages to answer, his weak “no, thanks” going unheard. Looking down into his empty glass, Kei sighs. He’s going to have to have a long, hard talk with himself about these feelings at some point. But it’ll have to wait. After all, tomorrow is the big day.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The way that none of y'all let me know how ao3 messed up the format of the texting in all the previous chapters.......fake friends i s2g........  
> ANYWAY happy reading!

Oh fuck.  _ Oh fuck. _ Shouyou knew this would happen. He knew that he would somehow manage to mess up his one task, and yet knowing this did not give him the ability to stop it.

He’s barely zipped his coat back up when he’s leaving the dorm again; he’d rushed right out of there to avoid the inevitable scolding he was due to get from Tsukishima. And he would’ve deserved it, too. If his forgetfulness ruined Yamaguchi’s birthday, he just wouldn’t forgive himself.

But Shouyou’s not giving up yet. There’s still time to get everything together if he moves quickly. He fishes his phone from his pocket as he marches down the hallway of his building.

**bakageyama**

**u busy????**

He checks that he’s sufficiently wrapped up before stepping outside, walking briskly back towards the centre of campus. He’d really hoped to watch a couple of volleyball replays this afternoon before meeting Kageyama at the gym for extra practice, but that’ll all just have to wait. Shouyou  _ refuses  _ to give Tsukishima  _ any  _ excuse to get mad at him.

His phone vibrates in his pocket, so he snatches it out quickly, his breath coming out in white puffs as he stomps towards campus.

**Yes IDIOT**

**I’m still in class**

Shouyou sighs. He  _ really  _ needs Kageyama’s help for this.

**well when do u finish?????**

Usually, Shouyou  _ loves  _ pressure. It makes things exciting, it gets him fired up. But not now. Not when Tsukishima is trying so hard to plan something special for Yamaguchi and Shouyou was so close to wrecking it. As salty as Tsukishima is, Shouyou can see that he obviously really cares about Yamaguchi and honestly, it’s kind of cute. Not that Shouyou would ever admit that to Tsukishima.

And Shouyou quite likes how things are turning out. It’s laughably convenient, the way he always seems to be with Kageyama and Tsukishima is rarely without Yamaguchi. Maybe they should just switch dorms altogether; sure, Kageyama’s annoying, but the good kind of annoying that Shouyou can laugh at. Unlike Tsukishima, whose particular brand of annoying is being snooty, condescending, and sarcastic.

He’s almost at his destination now, so he checks his phone to see if Kageyama’s messaged back yet. No such luck – the dumbass hasn’t even  _ read  _ Shouyou’s message. Which class is he even in? Perhaps Shouyou should pay a little more attention next time Kageyama talks to him about classes, and not just when he’s talking about volleyball.

Giving up on Kageyama for the moment, Shouyou ducks into the art building, happy to be out of the chill. He’s never been in this building before – because why would he? – so he has no idea where he’s going. Hell, he doesn’t even know  _ who  _ he’s looking for. He doesn’t actually  _ know  _ any of Yamaguchi’s friends other than Tsukishima; those two are  _ always  _ together, how does Yamaguchi even have time for other friends?

His phone buzzes – thank _ God. _

**20 minutes**

**What do you WANT????**

20 minutes. Shouyou can do 20 minutes. It’s not like he can even  _ do  _ anything right now, so he may as well just wait for Kageyama. 20 minutes isn’t  _ that  _ long.

**meet me in the art building when ur done**

**and stop bein so grumpy >:(**

Aimless in his waiting, Shouyou decides to explore a little. It’s a one story building, so he’s probably not going to get lost. He tries to take a leisurely pace, loosening his scarf and unzipping his coat, gazing at the walls as he passes. They’re all covered in works made by students, each corridor dedicated to a different artistic discipline. He ends up stopping a few times, his attention drawn by a particular painting or photograph.

He’s so absorbed that he doesn’t feel his phone buzzing away in his pocket, his attention only drawn when students begin to filter out of the rooms and into the hallways.

_ Oh, shit, _ he thinks. If he wants half a chance at grabbing any of Yamaguchi’s friends, now is the perfect time, except he can’t do so without Kageyama. He digs around his pocket for his phone to punch out a frantic message to Kageyama but catches his message first.

**I’m on my way**

**You better have a good reason for this**

**MORON**

Shouyou scoffs at this, tapping out a quick “ **hurry uppp!!!!!** ” before rushing back towards the entrance of the building in hopes of spotting Kageyama as he arrives. The students in the corridors don’t seem to be hanging about, clearly ready to get their Friday classes over with and finish for the week. For not the first time today, Shouyou curses his own forgetfulness.

The few minutes that pass until Kageyama arrives seem like an age, and there are now very few students left in the halls as he marches up to Shouyou wearing his habitual scowl.

“What’s all this about, dumbass,” he asks gruffly. “We weren’t supposed to meet til later.”

“I knoooow,” Shouyou whines, grabbing Kageyama’s arm and pulling him down the almost-baren corridors. “But I messed up. Do you know any of Yamaguchi’s friends?”

Kageyama’s eyes narrow. “Why?”

Rolling his eyes, Shouyou huffs. “Because we were supposed to find them and ask them to his surprise birthday thing tomorrow.”

“What do you mean, ‘we’? And what birthday thing? Who’s planning this? Why did nobody tell me?” Annoyingly, all of Kageyama’s questions are incredibly valid, but they just don’t have the time for them right now.

“Ugh! Tsukishima asked me to ask you to help with this thing he’s planned for Yamaguchi’s birthday but I forgot so we have to so it now or else Tsukishima’s gonna be mad and Yamaguchi’s birthday will be ruined and it’ll be all my fault.”

Kageyama just blinks at the speed of Shouyou’s admission, needing a few seconds to process it. Shouyou tugs on his sleeve impatiently.

“Well?” Shouyou prompts. “Do you know any of Yamaguchi’s friends?” He’s speaking to Kageyama slowly, because the look on his face says that Kageyama is still thoroughly confused. Shouyou thinks fleetingly that he actually looks kind of handsome when he’s not scowling all demon-like.

“I didn’t even know it was Yamaguchi’s birthday,” Kageyama finally answers, and the way that he sounds genuinely upset by this makes Shouyou pause for a second.

“From what Tsukishima said, he didn’t really tell anyone,” he says, moving ever so slightly closer to Kageyama and patting his arm reassuringly. “It’s not just you. And anyway,” he continues, perking up now, “if we do this right, that can be his birthday present from us, okay?”

“Okay,” Kageyama replies, squaring his shoulders in determination. “There’s a girl who’s in a few of his classes who he’s friends with. Um, Yachi, I think it was.”

“Yachi! That’s a good start!” Shouyou chirps, daring to feel a little hopeful. “Do you know her first name? Or what she looks like?”

“Hmm,” Kageyama hums thoughtfully, brow furrowing in thought. “I don’t know her name, but I think Yamaguchi said she’s small. And she’s definitely blonde. I remember Yamaguchi saying so because he says he likes blondes.”

“Nice, Kageyama!” Shouyou grins, clapping Kageyama on the shoulder. “I guess we better be on the lookout for a short blonde girl!”

The halls around them are looking a little fuller now, with students filing in, ready to start their classes. It’s still the middle of the day; they still have time. They start to do a slow lap, paying extra attention every time they see a blonde – they’re not sure just how short ‘short’ is so they’re extra meticulous.

Then Kageyama freezes, grabbing Shouyou by the shoulder to stop him too. Jolted, Shouyou looks up, and, seeing the expression on Kageyama’s face, follows his line of sight.

His eyes land on a girl, short and blonde and adorable, and Shouyou can feel the sense of triumph rising in him. That is, until he looks up to see who she’s in deep conversation with. Because  _ of course _ it’s Yamaguchi.

Shouyou tugs Kageyama down to stage-whisper in his ear. “That’s gotta be her. You distract Yamaguchi.”

With a firm nod, Kageyama marches up to Yamaguchi and awkwardly interrupts his conversation. There’s a look of utter surprise on Yamaguchi’s face, and seeing that he’s giving Kageyama his undivided attention, Shouyou swoops in.

“Yachi?” he hisses, and the girl jumps, eyes meeting his and face turning red.

“M-me?” she stammers, pointing at her own face.

Nodding frantically, Shouyou gestures for her to come closer. With a nervous glance towards a still occupied Yamaguchi, she shuffles hesitantly towards Shouyou, face still traffic-light red.

“What?” she asks when she’s in front of Shouyou, voice shaky. Shouyou offers her a grin in an attempt to seem non-threatening. (He’d consider himself permanently non-threatening, but Yachi’s reaction tells him that she currently thinks otherwise.)

“My name’s Hinata Shouyou. I’m Yamaguchi’s friend,” he introduces himself brightly, widening his grin and holding out his hand for Yachi to shake.

“Um, Yachi Hitoka,” she replies, taking his hand gingerly and shaking. There’s a second of awkward silence where Yachi clearly wants to ask Shouyou why he called her over but doesn’t want to appear rude. He saves her the trouble.

“I’ll make this quick,” he says, glancing back up at Yamaguchi and Kageyama. “We’re having a kind of party in town tomorrow to celebrate Yamaguchi’s birthday, but it’s a surprise so don’t tell him, okay?”

Yachi blinks at him as she absorbs the information. Her brow creases as it sinks in. “Tomorrow? That’s short notice. And I’m no good with parties, I don’t really like crowds–”

Shouyou cuts her off with a manic wave of his hands, eyes flicking back to Yamaguchi and Kageyama anxiously before returning to Yachi.

“Oh please, Yachi?” he begs. “It’s not even a proper party coz I forgot to invite everyone and that’s why it’s such short notice,” he admits, shoulders hunching in shame. “Please come? I don’t want to have ruined Yamaguchi’s birthday.”

The pity is obvious on Yachi’s face as she looks at Shouyou for a moment, silently chewing her bottom lip in nervous thought before she sighs. “Okay. Where is it? And what time should I be there?”

Shouyou can’t help the grin that splits his face in two, having used the last of his restraint to stop himself from jumping in glee. “Just give me your number, I’ll text you the details!” he says, handing her his phone.

She’s just finishing tapping in her number when Yamaguchi calls over to them.

“Yachi! Class is starting!” he says as he jogs over to them. “Oh, hi Hinata,” he says when he spots Shouyou. “I didn’t know you knew Yachi.”

“I didn’t!” Shouyou grins. “Just making a friend while I waited for Kageyama.”

“Oh, cool,” Yamaguchi smiles. Then, to Yachi, “We’re gonna be late, let’s go!”

Shouyou waves them off with a loud “Bye guys!” before turning to Kageyama to bump fists.  _ Mission accomplished. _ Next stop: the gym. He grabs Kageyama by the sleeve, keen to get onto the volleyball court and spike some of his tosses. As always, Kageyama’s protests are loud, but he allows himself to be dragged along all the same.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *andie voice* OH MY GOD, ARE YOU GUYS GAY?????  
> couldn't have done it without you babe <3
> 
> chapter kind of unbetaed coz cody got covid and andie is a slave to capitalism but here we go!!  
> happy reading!!! xoxo

Tadashi blinks his eyes open blearily, taking a second to remember where he is. Oh, that’s right; he stayed at Tsukishima’s last night. A memory comes to him unbidden, one of Tsukishima’s pink cheeks and lowered eyes as he’d told Tadashi that he was gay.  _ Oh God. _ Tadashi pulls Hinata’s duvet closer to his face in an attempt to cover his own blushing face. Then, remembering that said sheets haven’t been washed in a long while, drops it again.

Learning that Tsukishima likes guys shook Tadashi to his very core. For the rest of the night, the thought barely left his mind. He tried unsuccessfully to force himself to make eye contact with Tsukishima, and he almost chewed a hole through his bottom lip. He couldn’t tell you what films they’d watched last night, focus absolutely shot by the constant twisting of his stomach and stuttering of his heart.

And it’s ridiculous, really, because Tsukishima being gay doesn’t mean he likes Tadashi. Tadashi  _ knows  _ this, but the fact that he actually has a chance, however small, makes him feel like his heart could crack his ribs with the fury of its thumping.

Pushing back the duvet a little more, Tadashi glances across the room at where Tsukishima lies in his bed. He’s burritoed in his blankets; Tsukishima is perpetually cold, Tadashi has noticed, and yet still seems to constantly forget to wrap up for the cold weather.

If Tsukishima isn’t awake yet it must be early. Tadashi fumbles around Hinata’s bedside table for his phone, trying to make as little noise as possible. When it’s finally in his hands, the brightness of his phone screen has Yamaguchi squinting for a second before he manages to see the time. 10:26am. Not nearly as early as Yamaguchi had thought.

He sits up slowly so as to make as little sound as possible, stretching his arms high above his head before swinging his legs out of the bed and heading to the bathroom. When he returns, Tsukishima is sitting up in his bed, broad shoulders hunched as he glares down at his phone.

“Sorry, Tsukki,” Tadashi says softly. “Didn’t mean to wake you.”

“You didn’t,” Tsukishima replies, and the way his voice is still husky from sleep makes Tadashi’s insides tangle.

“Oh, um, good,” Tadashi stammers out, sure that his cheeks must be growing pink again.

Turning quickly to hide his blush, he sets about making Hinata’s bed if only to keep his hands busy. This just  _ can’t  _ be how he is around Tsukishima now; Tadashi’s had this crush for  _ weeks _ , why should things suddenly change now? Nothing’s changed, not really. Tsukishima’s sexuality doesn’t make a difference; Tadashi’s not going to do anything that could threaten their friendship. So he may as well just act like he always has with Tsukishima and enjoy his company.

His back is still to Tsukishima when Tadashi hears him clear his throat to speak.

“Yamaguchi,” he says, and his tone makes Tadashi flinch.

Has Tsukishima noticed the change in Tadashi’s behaviour? Has he realised  _ why _ ? Tadashi feels the breath caught in his throat but he knows he needs to respond. He tries to prepare some sort of justification in his head:  _ sorry Tsukki, I didn’t mean to... _

“Yes, Tsukki?” is what he says out loud, slowly smoothing out the sheets to avoid having to turn around.

Tsukishima clears his throat again. “Would you like to go for breakfast with me?”

Well he hadn’t been expecting  _ that _ . Not that it’s anything different to what they usually do. Just two friends going to breakfast together. It’s not like he’s asking Tadashi on a  _ date _ .

Tadashi only realises that he’d forgotten to respond when Tsukishima speaks again.

“I thought we could go into town,” he says, tone unreadable. “Don’t worry about money. Think of it as my....birthday treat.”

_ Oh. _ The fact that Tsukishima even wants to do anything for Tadashi’s birthday is...Well, it makes Tadashi feel warm. He takes a second to try and steady his breathing, to settle his heart, and then turns to face Tsukishima.

“That would be nice,” Tadashi says, more breathless than he intended. Looking at Tsukishima, Tadashi’s comforted to see that his cheeks seem flushed too, still staring down at his phone and avoiding Tadashi’s eyes.

“Okay,” is all Tsukishima says in return.

-x-

By the time they make it into town, it’s closer to lunch time, but neither of them seem to mind much. Their idle chatter dies down as they approach the main high street, their footsteps slowing minutely as they realise their lack of destination.

“Is there anywhere you’d like to go?” Tsukishima asks.

“Um,” Tadashi starts, caught a bit off-guard. “I still don’t really know the town that well,” he admits, smiling sheepishly and scratching at his cheek with his index finger. “Do you know anywhere good, Tsukki?”

Tsukishima’s response is to silently lead Tadashi down a series of complicated alleys, each turn making Tadashi grow just a little bit more uneasy. As they enter an unremarkable building through an unassuming door, Tadashi almost wants to speak up, to ask Tsukishima just  _ where  _ they’re going, but he doesn’t. He follows in silence. As they come to the top of a flight of stairs a bright space opens before them, tightly cluttered with mismatched chairs and tables.

It looks like the kind of place the protagonists of indie movies would hang out. Tadashi thinks that it suits Tsukishima a lot; cool in that effortless, understated way, if maybe a little difficult to unearth. Maybe the difficulty makes it all the more intriguing. But he doesn’t say so.

“This place looks really cool, Tsukki!” is what he does say. “How did you find out about it?”

“My brother told me about it,” Tsukishima responds as they take a seat at a corner table. “He studied at our university too.”

“Oh wow, that’s awesome! You’ll have to tell me about him some time, Tsukki!”

Tsukishima only grumbles in response, which makes Tadashi smile fondly. He really does enjoy Tsukishima’s company, even without considering his apparently debilitating crush. It’s like Tadashi gets to see a side of Tsukishima that no one else does, one that’s not just cold and unapproachable but witty and sweet and honestly kind of dorky. Tadashi can’t help but revel in the moments when Tsukishima lets these aspects of himself float to the surface.

They order, and eat soon after. Tadashi tries to be conservative in his choices, conscious that Tsukishima had offered to pay, but he still ends up eating more than Tsukishima; Tsukishima’s appetite is fairly low, Tadashi has noticed, but he does enjoy sweets. At some point Tadashi may examine how many of these little facts he’s discovered about Tsukishima and tucked away for safekeeping, but not quite yet.

As promised, Tsukishima pays for the whole meal, Tadashi stuttering out his thanks while his cheeks undoubtedly cycle through every shade of pink in the process. It all feels so incredibly  _ date-like _ that Tadashi has to repeatedly talk himself down. His heart, of course, refuses to listen, slamming in his chest to its own feverish beat.

The clock on the wall of the cafe tells Tadashi that it’s nearing 1pm when they leave, back down the steep stairs and through the winding passages to the high street. Tadashi is expecting them to head straight for the bus stop and back to the dorms, or even maybe to campus. However, Tsukishima doesn’t take the turn.

“Huh?” Tadashi says out loud, mostly unintentionally. He looks questioningly towards Tsukishima, but Tsukishima’s face is unreadable. “We’re not going home?”

“Not yet,” is all Tsukishima offers, and Tadashi’s stomach flips in anticipation.

“Oh, okay,” he offers weakly, letting his love for surprises overrule his consuming curiosity and following as Tsukishima leads.

They don’t walk for long, leaving the main streets of town but not straying far from the centre. Tadashi’s curiosity is seconds from winning out when he spots a familiar head of orange hair, flanked by two equally familiar faces.

“Huh?” Tadashi repeats, his obvious bewilderment drawing a smirk from Tsukishima.

“Happy birthday, Yamaguchiiiii!” Hinata yells as Tadashi and Tsukishima approach them, waving his arms manically about his head.

Stunned to silence, Tadashi assesses the scene in front of him. On one side of Hinata, Yachi smiles brightly, hands clasped tightly in front of her. On the other, Kageyama frowns as he tries to bat Hinata’s flailing hands out of the air. And beside Tadashi, Tsukishima glances down at him, eyes tender and smile gentle.

“Happy birthday, Yamaguchi,” he echoes. “Sorry it’s a little late.”

Tadashi is still speechless as he feels his eyes fill, embarrassed by how suddenly emotional he feels. He turns to Tsukishima with wide eyes. “What’s happening right now?”

Tsukishima grins down at him. “We’re having a birthday party, of course.”

“Yeah, let’s go in and get this party started!” Hinata exclaims, already halfway through the door of the building in front of which they stand.

Tadashi finally takes in his surroundings. The building houses an arcade, the multiple melodies of the game machines audible through the open door. He looks up at Tsukishima again, the two of them the last left outside.

“Well I know you like video games, so this seemed like something you might enjoy...” he justifies, hands twining nervously in front of him.

“This was your idea?” Tadashi asks, breathless in wonder.

Tsukishima nods once. Tadashi wants desperately to kiss him.

But instead he gives a wobbly grin, blinking back the wetness in his eyes. “Thank you, Tsukki.”

“Let’s go inside, Yamaguchi,” says Tsukishima, with a smile that feels like it’s meant for Tadashi and Tadashi alone.

-x-

Inside, Hinata and Kageyama are already sitting behind the twin steering wheels of a racing game, throwing heckles and insults at each other without regard for who might hear. Yachi stands behind them, occasionally offering hesitant encouragement. She turns when she hears Tadashi and Tsukishima approach.

“Yamaguchi!” she calls as she closes the gap between them.

Tadashi notices Tsukishima move towards where Hinata and Kageyama are still playing, but tears his attention away to focus on Yachi.

“Happy belated birthday,” she beams, handing him a tiny box. “It’s not much, but I hope you like it.” Inside the box Tadashi finds a keyring, simple steel with green chafer beetle dangling from the end. The beetle looks real, maybe encased in some kind of resin.

“I remembered you said you liked bugs,” Yachi says as he pulls the keyring out of the box for a better look. “It glows in the dark, too,” she beams.

“Yachi, it’s awesome!” Tadashi exclaims, pulling her in for a hug. “Thank you so much!”

It’s almost all too much for Tadashi. On his birthday he’d felt so melancholy, so alone here away from his family. For the first time in his life, Tadashi had woken up to silence on his birthday. And the worst part was knowing that this was what he had to look forward to for all birthdays to come.

But he was wrong. Tsukishima had made sure that Tadashi’s birthday would be special, memorable for the right reasons. Even if things were different now, if he hadn’t woken up to the sound of his mother’s voice singing ‘Happy Birthday’, he wasn’t alone. He still has people who care enough to make his day extraordinary.

He can’t keep the smile off his face as he grabs Yachi’s hand. “Come on,” he grins, “let’s play ‘Dance Dance Revolution’!”

As it turns out, Yachi is  _ amazing  _ at DDR, beating Tadashi with ease. Hinata demands to be her next challenger, having annihilated Kageyama in their virtual race. Kageyama argues the validity of Hinata’s win before taking out his anger on a pinball machine.

Laughing breathlessly, Tadashi stumbles towards Tsukishima. “Are you not gonna have a go, Tsukki?”

“Hmm,” Tsukishima hums. “I’m not really much of a dancer.”

“I never would have guessed,” Tadashi teases, earning him a smirk from Tsukishima. “What’s your game of choice then?”

“I’m rather adept at claw machines,” Tsukishima claims, still wearing that disgustingly attractive smirk.

“Prove it,” Tadashi challenges with a grin, nudging Tsukishima towards the machines in question.

Of course, Tsukishima had been telling the truth: his talents are becoming too many for Tadashi to count, and yet, he doesn’t stop trying. With subtle and precise movements, Tsukishima manages to win a stuffed frog from the machine, bright green and maybe as big as his hand. He retrieves it from the machine and immediately hands it to Tadashi.

“It’s not much of a gift, really,” he says as he does, and Tadashi can’t tell whether the colour on his cheeks is from the coloured arcade lights or perhaps something else. “I’ll win you a better one.”

“Tsukki, I love it,” Tadashi breathes, clutching the small toy to his chest. Maybe this birthday is different to what he’s used to, but Tadashi feels like this might be the best he’s had yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> can you tell i haven't been to an arcade in years??? yeah sorry about that hahaha
> 
> kudos and comments ALWAYS appreciated, and feel free to come yell at me on twitter @burnthisoka! xoxo


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank u codykins for betaing this, i wuv u xoxo
> 
> And to the rest of you, happy reading!! <3

It’s only the look of pure joy on Yamaguchi’s face that stops Kei from walloping Hinata on sight. For the minute, he’s occupied, unable to look away from Yamaguchi’s wobbly grin and watery eyes, and he can’t help but think that he would do anything for that smile, that face, that boy.

But that doesn’t mean that Kei’s going to let Hinata get away with it. Once everyone is inside and Yamaguchi is distracted by Yachi, Kei makes his way over to where Hinata and Kageyama sit gripping their fake steering wheels in violent competition. Silently he watches until their showdown ends and Hinata emerges victorious. Kei doesn’t allow him to celebrate his win for long.

The two begin to bicker about a rematch, but both fall silent as Kei’s hand grips Hinata’s shoulder. His face must give him away, because when Hinata turns in his seat to face Kei, his smile drops.

“You had one job,” Kei says evenly, his hand still clamped on Hinata’s shoulder. Hinata stays silent, wide eyes locked on Kei’s face. “Care to explain what happened?”

“What do you mean?” Hinata replies, eyes nervously shifting towards Kageyama who looks anxiously back.

“I  _ mean _ ,” Kei replies, voice almost a hiss, “that when I asked you to invite Yamaguchi’s  _ friends _ , I’m certain I used the plural form of the word.”

“I did!” Hinata contests. “We  _ are  _ his friends! And really, it’s not like it matters anyway. Look how happy Yamaguchi is!”

Well, that much is true. Kei lets his gaze drift to where Yamaguchi is still standing with Yachi. It looks like she’s just given him a gift. Kei curses internally.  _ Why didn’t I do that? _ As he watches Yamaguchi pull Yachi into a hug, Kei doubly curses. How could he have overlooked such simple birthday etiquette?

Then Yamaguchi takes Yachi’s hand and drags her off to some game, and Kei thinks that maybe it isn’t the gift that made Yamaguchi hug Yachi. Maybe Hinata  _ didn’t  _ fail at his task; just maybe he’d managed to invite the most important of Yamaguchi’s friends.

Kei doesn’t like the taste that thought leaves in his mouth. While he knew that Yamaguchi was bound to be popular – just  _ look  _ at him, spend a  _ minute  _ around him and you’re gone, – but Kei had never taken the time to consider that maybe Yamaguchi might be interested in someone romantically.

But as he stares at them, sees how Yamaguchi smiles and laughs with Yachi, he thinks maybe he should. And it constricts like a hand around his heart, but he thinks that if Yamaguchi is happy, then maybe the pain is bearable.

-x-

Yamaguchi seems to have a lot of fun, so Kei deems the day a success. The five of them stumble from the arcade around 5pm, having played on every machine multiple times. Well, the other four played; Kei isn’t really one for games so he mostly just watched Yamaguchi. Of course, when Yamaguchi asked him to join, Kei never once said no.

The sun has mostly set at this time, the sky quickly relinquishing the last of its light, and the chill in the air makes Kei wish he’d worn his scarf. He looks at Yamaguchi as they leave, hoping that he isn’t also suffering in the November cold. Yamaguchi glances back, smiling brightly before turning back to rejoin Yachi and Hinata’s conversation.

Kei buries his hands in the pockets of his jacket, bringing his shoulders up around his ears in an attempt to trap some body heat. The stars are faint against the navy sky, and Kei lets his head tip back to admire them as he walks. He’s barely paying attention, eyes fixed on the steady twinkle above him, when he feels a sudden heat pressed against his side.

“Hey, Tsukki?” Yamaguchi says, voice barely above a whisper.

Attention brought back to Earth, Kei lets his eyes fall on Yamaguchi. He’s smiling softly up at Kei, a slight crease between his eyebrows. It seems that the two of them have fallen behind, Hinata’s boisterous laugh growing fainter up ahead.

“Hmm?” Kei hums in response, gaze flitting across Yamaguchi’s features.

Under the warm yellow of the streetlights, Yamaguchi’s skin seems to glow gold, his eyes a brown so deep and dark that Kei can’t tell where pupil ends and iris begins. He lets his eyes fall to Yamaguchi’s lips, lets himself indulge for just a second, believing himself safe under the cover of partial darkness. A second is all he gets before Yamaguchi speaks again.

“Whatcha thinkin’ about?” Yamaguchi’s voice is still low, and it feels so intimate to Kei that he can’t help but gulp.

“Just hoping you had a good day,” Kei replies, tone equally as muted so as to conserve this private little bubble they seem to have cultivated.

Yamaguchi grins that grin, but Kei would rather let it blind him than look away.

“It was perfect, Tsukki,” he says, and the warmth that he radiates makes Kei momentarily forget about the cold that is trying to settle in his bones. “I can’t believe you did all this for me.”

There’s a hit of colour to Yamaguchi’s cheeks – can he feel the warmth too? Kei wants to lean in closer; their arms are already pressed together from shoulder to wrist, but Kei wants more. He wants to take Yamaguchi’s hand in his, to feel his flushed skin against Kei’s cold. But he just smiles, setting his eyes on the road ahead of them.

“Of course,” he murmurs.

They’re silent all the way to the bus stop, but neither of them move away, content to share their body heat for the duration of the walk.

-x-

Things are different after Yamaguchi’s birthday, but only slightly, so slightly that sometimes Kei wonders if he might have imagined the change.

It’s in the smallest moments that Kei notices it; in the way that Yamaguchi doesn’t move away when their legs touch under the library table, in the way that Yamaguchi doesn’t look away when Kei catches his eye over their books. It’s in the way that Yamaguchi looks at him like there’s not another person in the world that he’d rather be here with.

And it drives Kei crazy with its impossibility. Maybe he’s just seeing what he wants to see, is just seeing his own wishes reflected back in Yamaguchi’s eyes, but it feels palpable. As if all Kei had to do was take one step and Yamaguchi would meet him in kind.

But then Kei remembers Yachi, and the way Yamaguchi had hugged her and smiled at her and held her hand with ease, and Kei contemplates two options. The first is that perhaps Yamaguchi is just an affectionate friend; he’s already so easy to give praise and loving words, so it’d make sense to assume that he is equally as open with his physical affection. The second option is a bit harder to swallow. The second option is that Yamaguchi is romantically interested in Yachi, and, while he values Kei as a friend, the change that Kei feels is entirely in his head.

Weeks pass with these thoughts battling in his mind, his belief in each changing on an hourly basis. Christmas comes as a welcome break, a brief escape from his inner turmoil and a chance to get back to a reality he understands. Even if said reality does contain an overabundance of the Tanaka siblings.

“Are you excited to go home for the holidays, Tsukki?” Yamaguchi asks from his seat across from Kei. They’re in the library again, of course, but Yamaguchi doesn’t seem to be getting much work done.

“I suppose,” Kei replies, glancing up momentarily from his laptop. Yamaguchi is leaning back, balancing his chair on two legs. “Be careful,” Kei warns before he can stop himself.

Yamaguchi laughs as he lets the chair fall forwards solidly. “You have a brother, right? Are you looking forward to seeing him?”

Kei’s face scrunches into a frown. “I suppose,” he repeats, earning him another laugh from Yamaguchi.

“You’re so lucky, Tsukki. I wish I had siblings.”

“Oh? I didn’t know you were an only child,” Kei comments, now giving Yamaguchi his full attention; he can’t focus on work when Yamaguchi is smiling like that anyway.

“Yep. It’s just me and my mum at home,” Yamaguchi says as he fiddles with his empty coffee cup. “But I’d like to have siblings. Younger ones, I think.” He grins now, looking into Kei’s eyes. “Then I could really spoil them for Christmas.”

Kei considers his own family. His mother and father are still married, his brother and Saeko often spending time with them. His house is always loud and bustling when he comes home. As annoying as it can be, he can’t imagine home any other way.

“Are  _ you _ looking forward to going home?” Kei asks tentatively, conscious of the wistful look in Yamaguchi’s eyes.

“Yeah,” he says gently, smile growing soft. “I’ve really missed my mum so I can’t wait to see her.” He leans forward, resting his elbows on the table and propping his knuckles under his chin. “Gonna miss you though, Tsukki.”

Kei’s stomach jolts, his breath catching in his throat. Yamaguchi is still wearing that tender smile, and Kei wants nothing more than to tell him everything.  _ “I’ll miss you too,” _ he wants to say. _ “I think I’m falling for you,”  _ he wants to scream.  _ “Can I please kiss you?” _ he wants to beg.

“Oh really?” he says instead, voice surprisingly even considering his internal cacophony.

Yamaguchi’s smile grows, bright and true. “Of course, Tsukki! Four weeks is a long time – what am I gonna do without you?”

Kei’s heart has decided to pursue a life outside of his chest. That can be the only explanation for the way it’s currently trying to burst through his sternum. “Maybe you’ll get some work done without me there for you to use as a distraction.”

“Wouldn’t that be nice?” Yamaguchi chuckles. When he stops, he doesn’t avert his gaze, staring deeply into Kei’s eyes. “I mean it though, Tsukki. Will you text me over break?”

“Yes,” Kei answers instantly, hoping that he doesn’t sound as breathless as he feels.

“Every day?”

“Every day.”

“You promise, Tsukki?”

“I promise, Yamaguchi.”

Yamaguchi smiles, and it is the only incentive Kei needs to know that he’ll do everything in his power to keep his promise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I hope you liked it! I'd *like* to have the next up by the New Year but it's a busy week so forgive me if it's late~


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It is only thanks to the beautiful, wonderful, sensational Andie that this chapter is going up before New Year – love u forever babie xoxo  
> And of course thanks to Cody, my soulmate <3  
> Happy reading everyone!!!

The train station is packed with students as Tadashi stands on the platform and waits for his train. His suitcase rests heavy on the ground beside him, as much of his new life as he could fit stuffed haphazardly inside. There’s a similar weight in his stomach; the feeling of incompleteness that comes from living two separate lives.

On the one hand, Tadashi can’t wait to go home. He’s missed his mother maybe more than any 19 year old boy should, and he knows that she’s missed him tenfold. But at the same time, he doesn’t want to go. He doesn’t want to leave the life he’s in the middle of building here. He doesn’t want to leave the people who have become integral pieces of that life.

In all honesty, he doesn’t want to go a month without seeing Tsukishima. Since Tadashi’s birthday, there’s been the slightest hint of a spark there, a single droplet of hope that maybe there is something between them that could possibly become something. Perhaps it’s just a fantasy that Tadashi is allowing himself to accept as truth, but he can’t let the possibility go.

So maybe he’s been a little bolder with Tsukishima. Maybe he’s allowed himself to stare more openly and touch more brazenly in the hopes that Tsukishima would notice and perhaps reciprocate. But Tsukishima’s behaviour towards Tadashi has remained maddeningly unreadable. While he’s never pulled away from Tadashi’s push, he hasn’t pushed back either. He has remained immovable.

And though it’s frustrating, a part of Tadashi is glad. Tsukishima standing still is better than him walking away, and Tadashi doesn’t know if he wants to find out how hard he has to push to make him do either.

The train pulls into the station with a laboured breath, settling tiredly before opening its doors, an invitation to Tadashi to _“come home”_. And maybe Tadashi is divided, unsure of whether he’s going towards home or away from it right now, but he lifts his heavy case, lets that heavy weight take root in his stomach, and steps onto the train.

-x-

Tadashi’s mother meets him at the station, stepping out of the car and pulling him into a crushing hug as soon as she spots him. His suitcase falls forgotten beside him as she squeezes him with surprising strength.

“Oh, Tadashi!” she squeals from where her face is pressed against his cheek. He just laughs in return, unable to move in her grasp.

“Hi, mum,” he chuckles out. “You’re crushing me, you know.”

She lets go of him with a huffed laugh, ushering him into the car before retrieving his case and placing it in the boot. The door slams shut as she drops into the driver’s seat with a sigh, dexterously shifting the car into gear before speaking.

“Come on then, Bubble. Tell me everything.”

-x-

He does tell her everything, if with the omission of a few incriminating details. He tells her about Tsukishima and Yachi, of Kageyama and Hinata and everything that they’ve been up to since he left for university in September. Even if he already told her over the phone, he tells her again and she laughs and asks questions as if she’s never heard it before.

And she tells him everything; about work and her sister and her short online dating phase. She’s practically glowing, visibly so happy to have him home, and Tadashi almost forgets about his internal conflicts and longing, perfectly content to be back home with his favourite person.

“Tsukishima seems quite the catch,” she says when Tadashi tells her about his birthday, an eyebrow raised in obvious suggestion.

Tadashi can feel his face growing hot. “He’s pretty great,” he says back, his eyes cast downward but his smile wide.

His mother’s smile is so knowing that he can barely look, but she doesn’t say anything else. She just makes her way to the kitchen, shouting over her shoulder to ask if he wants a cup of tea. He says yes, and the subject is dropped – for now.

-x-

Tsukishima keeps his promise. They text every day. Some days it’s just a couple of messages between whatever activities either has planned for the day, but some days Tadashi finds himself glued to his phone, the messages flowing back and forth between them for hours. Tadashi loves these days, can barely wipe the smile from his face as his fingers tap nimbly across his screen.

Today is one such day. It’s Christmas Eve, and Tadashi’s mother has to work – because “people still get sick at Christmas, Bubble,” – so Tadashi is free to text all day. Really, he’d drop whatever he was doing in a heartbeat to text Tsukishima on any day, but Tsukishima has a big family and is often occupied in the day, which is the usual reason for lag in their conversations.

Tadashi doesn’t know who he’s more jealous of; Tsukishima for having the kind of family that Tadashi could only dream of, or the rest of Tsukishima’s family for being able to monopolise Tsukishima’s time and attention.

But today, with his family all present to occupy each other, Tsukishima has managed to remain prompt in his responses.

**The Tanakas are quite possibly the loudest people alive.**

**I may not make it to the New Year.**

**rip tsukki!!!😔**

**i’ll never forget you😭😭**

**I escape Hinata to come home to this.**

**Am I a bad person?**

**Is this karmic retribution?**

**u kno tsukki**

**u really are so dramatic🙄😂**

**So that’s what you think.**

**it sure is😁**

Tadashi grins at the screen as the little dots pop up to indicate that Tsukishima is typing. There’s that tiny voice in his head that says this _could_ be perceived as flirting. And yeah, that makes his heart beat a little faster – so what?

**Nice of you to kick me while I’m down.**

**aww tsukki i’m sorry😔**

**how can i make it up to u???**

**Come and rescue me.**

_Oh._ The breath catches in Tadashi’s throat, his lungs still and burning. There it is – the remnants of that miniscule change in their dynamic, the silhouette of a challenge from Tsukishima. _Push._

Giving into impulse, Tadashi selects Tsukishima’s contact information, and before he can talk himself out of it, he presses ‘call’.

The tinny ringing chimes in Tadashi’s ear as he presses the phone to it, while he grows more and more nervous with each second that passes without Tsukishima’s answer. He’s seconds away from just hanging up when the ringing stops and a deep voice trickles honey-rich from the speaker.

“Yamaguchi?” Tsukishima sounds confused, his voice slightly lower through the wire. Tadashi considers that perhaps submitting to his every whim is not the wisest idea, but he’s too far in now to back out.

“Hey, Tsukki,” he greets sheepishly. “I may not be able to rescue you, but I thought this was the next best thing.”

The pause as Tadashi waits for Tsukishima to speak is agonising. He holds his breath.

“It is,” Tsukishima finally says, and Tadashi can hear the smile in his voice. He can’t help but smile back.

“Yeah,” he breathes. “I didn’t realise how much I missed hearing your voice.” It’s said in a whisper, an admission that Tadashi hadn’t meant to say out loud but wouldn’t dream of taking back.

There’s an unidentifiable sound from Tsukishima’s side of the call; a sort of choked gasp that could have easily been a crackle in the connection. Tadashi’s eyes are squeezed shut as he strains his ears to listen – as if concentrating hard enough will pull an equally earnest response from Tsukishima.

“I…” Tsukishima starts, and Tadashi lets himself hope. But the silence stretches until Tadashi can no longer bear it.

“You what, Tsukki?” he murmurs. His hands are shaking and he feels ridiculous, because _obviously_ Tsukishima is not going to say what Tadashi wants him to, but _what if he did._

Then a crash, and a yelp, and a distinct _tsk_ before Tsukishima sighs heavily down the phone.

“I have to go,” he says, his voice almost too loud in the wake of the broken spell. “Can I....” The noise coming from Tsukishima’s end of the line is rising in volume, multiple voices coming into focus. “Can I call you again later?”

Tadashi finds himself nodding before he can get his words out. “Yes! Yeah, I would like that, Tsukki.”

“Okay,” is all Tadashi hears before Tsukishima is drowned out by the sound of other voices, faintly picking up a mumbled “goodbye” before Tsukishima hangs up.

Closing his eyes, Tadashi takes a deep breath, and holds onto that sliver of hope.

-x-

To say that Tadashi waits for Tsukishima’s call all night would be an unfair simplification. In reality he busies himself quite effectively with cleaning the house, wrapping presents, and replying to the few spread out texts he receives from Tsukishima. But his mind is occupied through it all with the anticipation for that phone call – ‘later’ isn’t really specific enough for someone as perpetually anxious as Tadashi.

His mother returns from work around 8pm, by which time Tadashi is well and truly on edge. Around six hours have passed since his call with Tsukishima, the handful of texts exchanged between them in that time mundane and making no mention of their plans to call. Tadashi’s mother seems to sense his agitation as soon as she gets in.

“What’s got you so jumpy?” she asks, eyebrow quirked, as she slips off her shoes and drops her bag in the entryway.

He mumbles and grumbles a response that explicitly states ‘please don’t ask me again’.

“Say no more. Want to watch a movie?”

He nods, thankful for his mother’s ever-delicate sense of perception and her keen intuition for when he needs her to give him a bit of space.

After getting changed, his mother picks a movie – it’s a Christmas film, but Tadashi couldn’t tell you which, too consumed with his nervous energy to pay attention. They’re about 20 minutes in when Tadashi’s phone begins to vibrate, Tsukishima’s caller ID lighting up on his screen. Tadashi leaps up, barely mumbling an excuse before he’s in his room with the door closing behind him. With a deep, grounding breath, he accepts the call.

“Yamaguchi.”

“Hey, Tsukki.” Tadashi is already grinning, which is apparently his automatic reaction to hearing Tsukishima’s voice.

There’s a pause, the silence filled with a tension that Tadashi swears he can feel on his skin. Can Tsukishima feel it too? Words sit at the back of Tadashi’s tongue, words he knows he can’t say but so badly wants to. Another second of silence and he would have, but he doesn’t get the chance.

“I miss you too, Yamaguchi.” The words come out stiff, as if Tsukishima has rehearsed them or is reading them from a flash card, but Tadashi gasps all the same.

“You do?” he asks breathlessly, doubt and insecurity slipping into his voice.

“Of course I do,” Tsukishima assures in the gentle, genuine tone that Tadashi has only heard directed at himself. The hope flickers once more. 

A pause, so charged that Tadashi can’t breathe. A whispered question that Tadashi can’t stop himself from asking. “What do you miss the most?”

Tadashi hears Tsukishima breathe deeply. “I miss watching documentaries with you because you always ask the right questions and listen to my explanations, even when I ramble.” 

It’s not what Tadashi had hoped for, but it makes him smile regardless. The tension ebbs, replaced by a pure fondness that fills Tadashi’s chest with a subtle warmth. He feels comfortable, his nerves settling and letting him simply enjoy Tsukishima’s company.

“What else?” he probes, grin evident in his voice.

“I miss your bad jokes and how you always laugh too hard to finish telling them.”

“My jokes are _not_ bad!” Tadashi protests with a laugh, and he just knows that Tsukishima is smirking to himself on the other end of the line.

“I even miss sitting in the library and getting absolutely no work done, because the time never feels wasted if it’s spent with you.”

The laughter dies in Tadashi’s throat. How can Tsukishima just say these things and expect Tadashi _not_ to fall in love with him? To be fair, Tadashi has long since stopped resisting and has resolved to just let himself fall – whether Tsukishima is prepared to catch him or not.

“I can’t wait to see you again, Tsukki,” Tadashi says quietly into the phone, his smile true and his chest tight.

“Neither can I,” Tsukishima says back.

“Merry Christmas, Tsukki.”

“Merry Christmas, Yamaguchi.”


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (dedicated to andie, who beta'd this chapter like the Goddess she is, and deserves a bit of goodness after i've been terrorising her all week. love u beb <3)
> 
> so this chapter is important to me for 2 reasons.  
> 1) i am a die-hard kghn and i just love these boys  
> 2) when i set out to write this fic, my goal was to reach 30k words. that's twice as many as anything else i've ever written and i was skeptical. well today, friends, we break 30k ToT
> 
> SO THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO'S STAYED WITH ME!!!  
> and don't worry!! we are Far from done!
> 
> happy freaking reading friends! <3 xoxo

“Did you see that spike?! It was all  _ gwaaah  _ and then all  _ slam! _ So awesome, right Kageyama?!”

Tobio sighs, the sound probably too quiet to be picked up by his laptop microphone. “Yes I saw it, moron. We’re watching the same damn match. Now shut up, he’s about to serve.”

The grainy image of Hinata in the corner of Tobio's laptop screen flashes him a scowl, but it quickly dissolves as his attention turns back to the match.

The serve is strong, but easily received by the opposing side. Absently Tobio finds his gaze drifting to Hinata. His bright eyes and open mouth are the picture of pure wonderment, his immersion and passion so evident on his pixelated face. Then Hinata is cheering, fists pumping in victory, and Tobio’s eyes snap back to the match to see what he’s missed.

“That was so cool!” Hinata gushes. “We’ll have to try that combo when we’re together again. Can we, Kageyama?”

Tobio can feel a heat on his cheeks. Gulping, he nods, hoping that Hinata won’t pick up on his odd behaviour. He doesn’t seem to, just grinning and turning his attention back to the match.

It really  _ is  _ odd. When in his  _ entire  _ life has Tobio  _ ever  _ been distracted while watching a volleyball game? His brow furrows as he racks his brain for any such example that might help him figure out why it had just happened then. It’s not like the match is boring – and even if it were, boring matches command Tobio’s attention as there is always  _ something  _ to be learned from them. And it’s not even like Hinata was actively  _ trying  _ to distract him (for a change). He was just watching.

And Tobio should’ve been too. So why wasn’t he?

Another cheer, Hinata’s hands clapping together and startling Tobio once more. Match point. Hinata is grinning, eyes sparkling with an almost manic interest. What the  _ hell  _ is wrong with Tobio?

Hinata seems to catch onto Tobio’s inner turmoil, eyebrow quirking in question. “Kageyama? Are you okay?”

Clearing his throat roughly, Tobio grunts out a gruff, “I’m fine. Just concentrate on this serve, yours could use some work.”

Hinata just sticks out his tongue petulantly in response, causing a wave of heat to wash up Tobio’s neck and furthering his internal crisis.  _ What is going on? _

The match is over in a matter of seconds, the serve so powerful that the other side is unable to recover despite their best efforts. Tobio doesn’t think he’s ever been so happy to see a volleyball game end in his entire life.

Hinata opens his mouth to say something, but Tobio quickly cuts him off.

“Okay, I have to go now. Bye.”

And then he clicks the ‘End Call’ button, leaving Hinata to blink in confusion somewhere where Tobio doesn’t have to see it.

Well that was weird.

Tobio sits very still for a long while, gears grinding in his head. Maybe he’s not been getting enough sleep? Or is he hungry? That sort of thing always makes it a little harder to keep focused. But none of those can explain why Tobio couldn’t seem to tear his eyes away from Hinata. And as for the blushing – well, Tobio would like to find an explanation for that, and  _ fast, _ before it can happen again.

He can just imagine how Hinata would react if he ever noticed. ‘Why are you blushing, Bakageyama? Do you  _ like  _ me? Do you think I’m  _ cute _ ?’

Face growing red just at the thought, Tobio snaps his laptop shut.  _ Not a chance. _

The buzzing of his phone against his desk startles him a little, and his heart drops when he sees that it’s a text from Hinata.  _ Oh God, not now.  _ He can’t bring himself to open the message, too unnerved by the fluttering feeling in his stomach. Instead he abandons his phone and lumbers downstairs to look for something to eat.

He has rice stuffed into his cheeks when Miwa enters the kitchen.

“Don’t eat too much,” she says to him as she moves to take a mug from the cupboard. “Dinner’s soon.”

“Hmph,” Tobio grunts in response, unable to speak through the mouthful of half-chewed food.

She smirks at him as she fills up the kettle at the sink. “You wanna talk about it?”

Finally swallowing, he frowns. “Talk about what?”

“I can tell when you’re thinking too hard because you stuff your face,” she elaborates, preparing her tea while the kettle boils. “So do you wanna talk about it?”

“I’m not thinking too hard,” he protests, pushing his bowl away. Sometimes, Miwa is far too perceptive.

“Oh? Okay then.” The kettle whistles. “Heard you talking to your friend. What’s his name again?”

_ Oh no. _ “Hinata,” Tobio mumbles, knowing that this conversation can’t lead to anything good.

“Hinata, that was it!” She stirs her tea. “You guys must be pretty close, huh? I don’t think I’ve ever heard you speak to someone so often before.”

Tobio gulps. It’s true; he and Hinata have spoken a lot over the break. And not just about volleyball either. Sure, volleyball is always their main topic of conversation, but sometimes they talk about their families, or how their day was, or even, at the lowest points, their schoolwork. On occasion, Hinata will just text him to tell him about his random thoughts, or that he saw something that reminded him of Tobio. And of course, through it all there’s the bickering and arguing that sometimes ends in them ignoring each other for a few hours, but they always end up talking again as if nothing happened.

So yeah, maybe they  _ are _ close.

Which is what makes Tobio’s current predicament even worse. Because he’s never had a friend like Hinata. Maybe he’s never had a friend  _ at all, _ but now that he has one he doesn’t want to mess anything up. And getting flustered and distracted by your friend’s face is a problem that cannot be ignored.

“I guess,” is all he says.

“Hmm, you guess?” she replies with a smirk. “It’s not a bad thing, you know. Being close to someone.” She sits down across from him, setting her tea onto the table.

He drops his head, forehead pressing against the table, and groans. “I  _ know  _ that. It’s just...” He lifts his head to look his sister in the eye. “What if I mess it up?”

Miwa laughs, raising the mug to her lips. “You don’t seem to worry about that when I hear you yelling at each other.”

“That’s  _ different, _ ” he justifies. “He doesn’t care about that. But I’ve been feeling kind of weird and I don’t want it to ruin anything.”

Raising an eyebrow, she regards him coolly. “Weird how?”

Well, at this point, he may as well spill it. “I get...distracted. By him.” Miwa’s eyebrow arches impossibly higher, but he continues. “It’s embarrassing and I don’t want him to notice.”

Tobio looks to Miwa for her answer but she seems momentarily stunned, blinking slowly as she stares at him. He frowns.

“What?” he demands.

“Tobio, it sounds like you like him.”

“Well, yeah,” he admits. “He’s a dumbass but we have a lot in common, of course we get on.”

“No, Tobio,” she says, leaning towards him, eyes locked with his. “I think you  _ like  _ him.”

“What?” Tobio’s face is creased in confusion as he stares back at his sister’s wide eyes. “No, I think I’d know if I liked him.”

“Clearly you wouldn’t.” She sounds baffled, looking at him as if he is the most stupid person on the planet. “Tobio, have you ever had a crush before?”

“Of course!” He can feel his cheeks heating up but he’s already too far into this; might as well tell her. “I kinda liked Oikawa for a while in middle school,” he mumbles. If she doesn’t hear it, that’s her problem.

“Oikawa?” She bites her lip to suppress a laugh, earning her a hard scowl from Tobio. “Okay,” she says, clearing her throat and forcing her face back into a neutral expression. “And how did you know that you liked him?”

Tobio stares at the table, unable to look at her. “I thought he was pretty.” He waits for her to interrupt, but she stays quiet. “And really strong. And I wanted to be around him a lot.”

“Is that it?”

“No,” he admits reluctantly. “I wanted to kiss him.”

“Okay,” Miwa nods, clearly trying her absolute best not to burst out laughing. He’s quietly thankful. “And do you feel any of those things about Hinata?”

A frown settles onto Tobio’s face. That feels kind of like a trick question. “Well he  _ is _ strong, just kind of unpolished. He’s getting stronger, though.”

“And?”

He sighs. “I like being around him. He’s...nice.”

The look on Miwa’s face tells him to keep going.

“I guess he’s pretty...”

Tobio thinks of the sparkle in Hinata’s eyes as he watched the match hungrily. He thinks of how brightly he’d smiled when he’d beaten Tobio at that stupid arcade game. He thinks of how he looks when he soars through the air, palm poised to spike every ball that Tobio sets.

“Yeah,” he confirms. “He’s pretty.”

“And do you want to kiss him?” Miwa asks.

Oh.

“Yes.”

Well  _ shit. _

__

-x-

New Year’s Eve rolls around a few days later, and Tobio hasn’t replied to a single one of Hinata’s texts from the past few days. Because what the hell is he supposed to say?

‘ **_Sorry I hung up on you like that but it turns out I have a crush on you and I don’t know how to handle it without pushing you away completely. Anyway how was your Christmas?_ ** ’

Absolutely fucking not.

Miwa is at a party tonight, and their parents aren’t all too interested in staying up to ring in the new year, so Tobio spends the night alone in his room. It’s not ideal, but things could be worse.

He lies on his bed, scrolling through Hinata’s most recent texts.

**u were kind of weird before**

**are u okay?????**

**hey bakageyama!!!**

**answer me asshole!!!!!**

**did i do something wrong???? >:(**

**i’m sorry if i did!!!**

**okay**

**really sorry for whatever i did**

**text me if u wanna talk**

Well, Hinata was right about one thing; Tobio is an asshole.

But what can he do? Tobio thinks that maybe he wasn’t made for friends. He definitely wasn’t made for crushes, that’s for sure. Regardless, he misses Hinata, and knows that he’s gone about this entirely the wrong way and hurt Hinata in the process. If there’s a right time to fix things, it’s got to be now.

A quick check of the time tells Tobio it’s 11:53pm, and if he wants to keep his first and best friend before the year is up, he needs to act fast.

He selects Hinata’s contact, and presses ‘Call’.

After a few rings, Hinata picks up.

“Kageyama?” He sounds hesitant.

Tobio clears his throat nervously. “Hey, Hinata.”

“Why have you been ignoring me?” Hinata snaps immediately, and Tobio should have known that this is how it would go; Hinata never lets him get away with _ anything, _ why should he start now?

“I’m sorry.” Tobio can almost hear Hinata frowning suspiciously on the other end of the call. “I’ve been dealing with some...personal stuff.”

“You could’ve just said, you know,” Hinata huffs. Then, softer, “I’m your friend. I could’ve helped.”

“I know. I really am sorry.” Tobio holds his breath. He’s been really freaking  _ stupid. _ He just hopes that Hinata will forgive him.

“Okay,” Hinata says after a pause. “Don’t do it again, asshole.”

“I won’t,” Tobio promises with a relieved exhale.

At the same moment, he hears the noise pick up on Hinata’s end of the line.

“Oh!” Hinata exclaims. “It’s time to count down!”

“Shit, I’ll speak to you tomorrow then–”

“Kageyama!” Hinata cuts him off. “Let’s count down together!”

“Okay.”

So they do, Hinata in the middle of what sounds like a party, Tobio in the quiet of his bedroom. And as they ring in the new year, together but apart, Tobio can’t help but feel like maybe he was wrong. Maybe he was made for this after all.


	17. Chapter 17

The drive to campus is, for want of a better word, hell.

The problem with going to your older brother’s alma mater is that said brother will take every possible opportunity to visit, which means Akiteru had insisted on driving Kei back to campus. Even more of a problem is when your brother’s girlfriend insists on coming too, and seeing as  _ her _ brother  _ also  _ goes to the same university, of course  _ he _ has to come as well.

In short, Kei is suffering.

Forced to give up the passenger seat to Saeko and sit in the back with Tanaka, Kei is already salty only minutes into the journey. He is incredibly thankful that campus is only a couple of hours away, and resolves to just use his headphones to block everyone else out for the duration of the ride. He should have known, however, that the Tanakas would not allow him such peace.

“Kei!” Saeko calls, turning in her seat to talk to him.

His scowl doesn’t deter her as she motions for him to take off his headphones. He knows by now that there is absolutely no point in ever arguing with Tanaka Saeko, so he pulls them down to rest around his neck and embraces the torture.

“Are you looking forward to getting back?” she asks with a grin. “I bet you’ve really missed your boyfriend.”

Kei’s eyes shift from lazy disinterest to wide shock. “Excuse me?” he sputters in disbelief.

He can see Akiteru’s eyes shifting nervously between Saeko and himself in the rearview mirror, but Kei’s focus is solely on Saeko. She looks confused by his reaction.

“Your boyfriend – you know, who you’ve been texting non-stop since you got home?”

“Oh, yeah!” Tanaka pipes up from beside Kei, and Kei has to take a deep breath to avoid doing something he would definitely regret. “It’s that guy, right? The one with the freckles?”

The worst thing about this moment is probably how genuine the Tanakas are being. They’re not trying to make fun of Kei; they truly believe that Yamaguchi is his boyfriend. And this fills Kei with rage.

“He’s not my boyfriend,” Kei spits, but he feels that his point may be contradicted by the deep red of his face and neck. In fact, he thinks that this flush may just cover his entire body.

“Hey, Kei, that’s your business,” Akiteru attempts to placate, making Kei seethe. “You guys, quit bothering him.”

Saeko offers Kei one last questioning look before turning to her brother. “So Ryu, tell me what you and Noya have planned for Refreshers!”

Kei slips his headphones back over his ears, hoping to drown out the enthusiastic conversation in his ears and the annoying, fluttery feeling in his chest.

When they’re around half-way to the campus, Kei’s phone buzzes in his pocket. He knows who it’ll be, and he almost lets pride stop him from reading it. But the effort is futile; he knows that he can’t ignore Yamaguchi for long.

**tsukkiiiiii!!✨**

**i just got back!😁😁**

**ur still coming back today right?? 👀**

Kei suppresses his smile, conscious of Tanaka beside him, and taps out his reply.

**Yes, I’m in the car now.**

**Should only be another hour.**

**aaaaaa!!!**

**i can’t wait to see u tsukki!!🤩😁**

This time, he can’t stop himself. He smiles, and he can’t even find it in himself to be mad about it. Even if he can see Tanaka looking at him from the corner of his eye. Screw him.

**I can’t wait either.**

**:-)**

He locks his phone and stares pointedly out of the window and away from Tanaka, silently counting down the seconds to the inevitable comment. But it doesn’t come. When Kei curiously looks over at Tanaka, he just grins back, shooting Kei an enthusiastic thumbs up.  _ Oh God, _ that’s even worse. Kei turns away with a scowl as he feels his cheeks growing pink.

His phone alerts him to another text from Yamaguchi, which he opens immediately.

**so kageyama’s not back til tomorrow..**

**sleepover??** 👀 👀🤞🏽

Kei doesn’t even think twice before replying, his heart speeding up slightly in his chest at the thought of finally seeing Yamaguchi again. A month is a long time, it seems, and while texting every day with the occasional phone call has been kind of amazing, none of it compares to actually being with Yamaguchi. So he says the only thing he can, the only thing he’d ever even want to say to Yamaguchi.

**Absolutely.**

-x-

It takes a lot of convincing to assure Akiteru that Kei is completely fine unpacking his single case by himself and does not need the three of them to stick around while he does so. Finally, Akiteru and Saeko leave to accompany Tanaka to his room, but not before reminding Kei that they have plans tomorrow that he absolutely  _ cannot  _ get out of. After all, Akiteru and Saeko are staying at a hotel in town for the sole purpose of spending some time with Kei and Tanaka in the place where they’ve all studied, so they’re not letting Kei weasel his way out of it.

But Kei doesn’t care about any of that right now. As he leans against his closed dorm door, alone at last, all he can think about is how Yamaguchi is probably in his dorm room right now, barely a five minute walk away. So Kei is quick to unpack, barely even bothering to put his clothes away properly in favour of packing an overnight bag and heading straight out.

It’s not even close to sunset, even on this short, brisk, January day, but Kei knows that Yamaguchi won’t mind his early arrival. Where with anyone else such a time apart may have caused them to drift apart, this distance only seemed to draw them closer together. Closer than Kei ever thought they could be, in fact. Not quite as close as Kei would  _ like  _ to be with Yamaguchi, but close enough.

He’s breathless as he buzzes into Yamaguchi’s building and jogs up the stairs, whether from the cold, exertion, or excitement is anyone’s guess. But finally standing at Yamaguchi’s door, there’s a prickle of doubt that pokes at the back of his brain. What if things are awkward? Sure, things have been great with Yamaguchi over the phone. More than great – Kei might even venture to say things have been fucking fantastic. In person, though...well that could be another story entirely.

The moment quickly passes, and Kei feels ridiculous for even thinking that. Because this is Yamaguchi, the best person that Kei has ever known. So Kei knocks on the door, practically brimming with excitement.

It overflows when Yamaguchi opens the door.

“Tsukki!” he yells, beaming ear-to-ear, before throwing his arms around Kei’s neck and pulling him down into the warmest hug.

Kei closes his eyes, breathes in deeply and feels so at peace that he almost forgets where he is. Then Yamaguchi is pulling back, hands firm on Kei’s shoulders as Yamaguchi stares bright-eyed and smiling at Kei’s face. When Yamaguchi’s face falls into a frown, Kei feels his heart skip in dread.

“Tsukki, you forgot your scarf again,” Yamaguchi scolds.

Unable to stop it, and not really wanting to, Kei’s face breaks into a grin. He yanks Yamaguchi back into another crushing hug.

“Oh!” is all Yamaguchi can say, before laughing and wrapping his arms back around Kei. “I guess you really did miss me,” he mumbles into Kei’s shoulder.

“I really did,” Kei responds, feeling like he’s finally home.

When they finally pull apart, Yamaguchi’s freckles sit on a backdrop of dusty pink, and Kei finds himself staring until Yamaguchi turns away from the doorway and back into the room.

He clears his throat roughly, back to Kei. “So what do you want to do tonight?”

“I don’t mind,” Kei responds, following Yamaguchi in. And it’s true; he couldn’t care less what they do tonight. They could sit and watch paint dry and Kei would thank the stars that he was able to spend that time with Yamaguchi.

“Wanna go get food?” Yamaguchi asks, finally turning around.

“Sounds good.”

-x-

“Do you know when Hinata is getting back?” Yamaguchi asks, biting the end of a fry.

“No, actually,” Kei admits, picking at his own meal unenthusiastically. “We haven’t spoken since he left for break.”

“You mean you don’t even text?”

“Well, no,” Kei replies. Yamaguchi is frowning at him in a sort of disbelief. “I don’t really text anyone other than you.”

“Oh,” Yamaguchi says, colour rising in his cheeks. He doesn’t say any more, instead shoving more fries into his mouth. Kei can’t help but smile.

“Do you text with Kageyama?” he asks.

Yamaguchi chews for a second, then swallows. “A little. Sounds like he and Hinata have spoken a lot over break. I really do think Kageyama has a huge crush on him, you know. I’m just not sure if he realises it.”

“He is rather dense,” Kei responds, but he has a question burning the back of his throat. So he asks. “Did you speak to Yachi much?”

“Hmm, a couple times,” Yamaguchi says around another fry. “She was pretty busy all break, though. She has a girlfriend back home so I think her time was kind of occupied.”

Kei’s eyes snap up from his food to stare at Yamaguchi. “She has a girlfriend?” he asks without thinking.

“Mhm,” Yamaguchi nods. “They’ve been together years. Yachi’s pretty quiet usually, but get her talking about Mai and she won’t shut up. It’s really cute, actually.”

“I see,” is all Kei can say, head now swimming.

Yamaguchi is saying something, but all Kei can think is how there’s nothing romantic between Yamaguchi and Yachi. He feels ridiculous for having been so worked up about it before, but he always has been good at over-thinking himself into a state of despair.

“Tsukki?” Yamaguchi says, snapping Kei out of his head.

“Hmm?” Kei hums in response, mind still distracting him too much for him to speak.

“Are you gonna eat that?”

Kei looks down at his food. He’s barely touched his fries; it’s okay though, he’s pretty sure Yamaguchi will eat them, so they won’t be wasted.

“No, here,” he says, pushing the box towards Yamaguchi, who grins up at him.

“Thanks, Tsukki.”

Sipping at his milkshake, Kei watches as Yamaguchi tucks into the now-cold fries. He only realises he’s staring when Yamaguchi looks up.

“What?” he asks, wide-eyed, through a mouthful of fries. Kei lets himself smile. Yamaguchi really is so  _ cute. _

“Nothing.”  _ I just think I might love you. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes yachi's gf is the dateko manager i just think they'd be Cute  
> hope you all enjoyed!!! xoxo


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so thanks to andie as always for being the fucking best and betaing this chapter for me and hyping me up when i was having Doubts. love you endlessly babie xoxo
> 
> anyway, happy reading friends!!

Tadashi wakes up to the sound of bustling. Creaking a single eye open, he sees Tsukishima’s back as he roots through his bag that sits on Yamaguchi's bed – Tadashi had let Tsukishima sleep in his bed and took Kageyama’s because Tsukishima is just kind of weird like that. Tadashi doesn’t mind; it’s just another one of Tsukishima’s cute little quirks.

“Whatcha doin’?” Tadashi asks, voice slurred and heavy with sleep.

Tsukishima looks over his shoulder at Tadashi, glasses halfway down the bridge of his nose and hair tousled from sleep. Tadashi instantly feels a little more awake, his heart squeezing momentarily in his chest.

“I didn’t mean to wake you,” is Tsukishima’s answer.

“Slipping out without saying goodbye?” Tadashi jokes with a lazy grin, pushing back the sheets and sitting up. Tsukishima’s brow creases slightly. “Wait, is that actually what you’re doing?”

“My brother’s in town. He won’t let me get out of spending the day with him and, well...I didn’t want to wake you. I was going to text you.”

“Why didn’t you just tell me last night?” Tadashi asks, now wearing a frown of his own. “I don’t mind, you know.”

Tsukishima turns quickly back to his bag, but Tadashi can see the red at the tips of his ears. “I know you don’t,” he says as he rummages. Suddenly he stops, sighing, and turns back to Tadashi, face still pink. “Are you busy today, Yamaguchi?”

Blinking, Tadashi waits for his tired brain to catch up. “Um, no,” he stammers out. “I was probably just gonna watch trash on Netflix all day. Why?”

Tsukishima’s eyes dart to the ground, then up to somewhere behind Tadashi’s head; anything to avoid eye contact. “Do you want to come with me? I mean, it’ll probably be terrible,” he says as he wrings his fingers nervously in front of him. “My brother’s an ass, and then there’s Tanaka and Saeko, but...” He finally looks into Tadashi’s eyes. “It’d be a lot less torturous if you were there with me.”

_ Oh God. _ Tsukishima wants him there. With him. A wide grin spreads itself across Tadashi’s face.

“I’d love to come with you, Tsukki,” he beams.

Tsukishima offers a simple nod in return, his lips quirking into a small smile before he turns back to his bag. Still grinning, Tadashi throws his legs out of bed and goes about getting ready to meet Tsukishima’s family.

-x-

“I’ll warn you now, they’re all insufferable,” Tsukishima cautions as they exit Tadashi’s building.

Tadashi laughs. “Hey, I like Tanaka!” he exclaims, prompting Tsukishima to level him with his best look of disgust. It only makes Tadashi laugh more. “And I can’t wait to meet your brother. He sounds so cool.”

“Oh goodness, don’t let him hear you say that.”

_ “Ooooh, _ I’m gonna tell him that he’s the coolest guy ever. I’m gonna tell him that you talk about him  _ all the time,” _ Tadashi teases, poking at Tsukishima’s sides while they walk.

“You’re the absolute worst, Yamaguchi,” Tsukishima declares, but the way he seems to be fighting a smile says the opposite.

“Sorry, Tsukki,” Tadashi grins.

“No you’re not. You’re a little shit.”

“Hmm, guess so!” Tadashi chirps back, and this time Tsukishima can’t stop himself from smiling, an exhale of a laugh puffing from his nose. Pride swells in Tadashi’s chest at having dragged the stunted show of amusement from Tsukishima.

“Shut up, Yamaguchi,” he sighs. “He’s picking us up from there, come on.”

They wait in the spot that Tsukishima pointed out, hands in their pockets to ward off the cold. Tsukishima has one of Tadashi’s scarves wrapped around the lower half of his face – at Tadashi’s insistence – and it’s making the heat of his breath fog up his glasses. Tadashi giggles as Tsukishima makes a  _ tsk  _ sound, pulling the frames from his face and using the scarf’s loose end to clean them.

The glasses are still in his hand when a car rounds the corner and pulls up in front of them, pulling a sigh from Tsukishima as he pushes his glasses back up his nose. A woman with bobbed blonde hair hangs out of the passenger window, beaming wide.

“I see you’ve brought your  _ friend  _ along,” she says to Tsukishima, and her emphasis on the word  _ friend  _ leaves Tadashi feeling a little funny. He can’t tell if it’s in a good way or bad one.

Tsukishima just rolls his eyes and opens the car door, beckoning Tadashi in before getting in himself. Tadashi has to remind himself that this isn’t a gesture of chivalry, that Tsukishima’s legs are simply too long for the middle seat. He doesn’t have much time to agonise over it before there’s a sharp elbow digging into his ribs.

He lets out an  _ oof  _ as he turns to Tanaka beside him. “Yamaguchi!” Tanaka hollers, entirely too loud in the packed car. “I shoulda known you’d be joining us! Nice to have you, dude,” he grins, reaching over to ruffle Tadashi’s shaggy bangs.

Tadashi offers a smile back. “Thanks for having me,” he replies, but it’s really aimed at everyone in the car.  _ Especially Tsukki. _

“We should be the ones thanking you,” the man in the driver’s seat – Tsukishima’s brother – says back, looking at Tadashi in the rear view mirror. “There are few who willingly put up with Kei.”

He’s grinning, face all too similar to Tsukishima’s while simultaneously being nothing like it. His hair is much shorter, his features softer, less angular, and he seems to wear his feelings on his face. Tadashi notes that he’s handsome, a thought that he pushes aside before he gets himself flustered.

“Akiteru, I’d appreciate it if you left my guest alone,” Tsukishima deadpans, clipping in his seatbelt.

“See what I mean?” Akiteru says to Tadashi. “You deserve a medal, Yamaguchi.”

Tsukishima huffs at being ignored, while Tadashi just laughs politely, only a little bit awkward. With one last smile through the mirror at Tadashi, Akiteru begins to drive.

The woman – Saeko – fiddles with the radio until she settles on a cheesy station with a stable signal. Tadashi vaguely recognises the song, something poppy from the 2000s, but Tanaka and Saeko sing along at top volume. Beside Tadashi, Tsukishima seems to sink into his seat, face burying deeper into Tadashi’s scarf. Tadashi lets himself smile.

Was this what Tsukishima was like all through the break? So grumpy and adolescent, all the huffing and eye-rolling. Annoyingly, even petulant Tsukishima is cute to Tadashi. Still, he prefers the Tsukishima that he’s grown used to, the one that smiles and laughs and teases playfully instead of bitingly. The one that only Tadashi seems to be acquainted with.

They pull up in an area that Tadashi has yet to explore, far enough from the town centre that he’s not happened to stumble upon it naturally. There are people everywhere, a vast array of stalls set up along each side of the wide street, even some dotted around in the middle.

“You guys hop out, I’ll go park and we’ll meet you in a few,” Akiteru says over his shoulder to the three of them in the back.

Tanaka doesn’t wait to be asked twice, immediately unbuckling and getting out of the car. He’s already browsing the stalls by the time Tadashi has slid out, Tsukishima exiting through the other door and meeting him behind the car. They stand still for a beat as Akiteru drives away.

“What is this?” Tadashi asks as the sound of wheels on tarmac dies down. The market seems to stretch on for miles, each stall selling something different.

“The market’s here the first Sunday of every month,” Tsukishima explains as they begin to walk. “I’m pretty sure this is the only reason Akiteru and Saeko decided to stay in town for a night. We used to come here every time my parents would drop Akiteru back here for spring semester.”

Tadashi smiles up at Tsukishima, who seems to have his sights set on a particular stall. He loves these little moments, where Tsukishima opens up and tells him just a little, his words usually measured and straight-forward but with a nostalgia behind them. He’d never admit it, but these memories mean a lot to Tsukishima – Tadashi can tell. He’s thankful for the times when Tsukishima lets him see it, those memories that he holds dear, that make him who he is.

“Hey, guys!” Tadashi hears behind him, and turns to see Akiteru and Saeko, hand in hand, walking towards them. “Where did Ryu go?” Saeko asks.

Both Tadashi and Tsukishima only have shrugs to offer in response. Akiteru laughs as Saeko shakes her head.

“You know, you guys are useless,” she says, attempting to take a stern tone but failing miserably. “I’m gonna go look for my helpless baby brother,” she sighs dramatically. “Look after my dear love for me!” And with an exaggerated kiss on Akiteru’s cheek, she disappears into the crowd.

“That was disgusting,” Tsukishima declares, and Tadashi can’t help but snicker behind his hand.

“Hah!” Akiteru barks. “I’ll remember that when you find someone who actually wants to kiss you,” he says as he reaches up to drape his arm around Tsukishima’s shoulders, forcing him to hunch to match Akiteru’s height. His face looks red as he fights to shrug his laughing brother off.

As soon as he does, he takes a few long strides towards a stall further down the line, leaving Tadashi and Akiteru meters behind. Akiteru just laughs, making no attempt to catch up with Tsukishima. Tadashi just stands awkwardly for a few seconds, unsure of whether he should follow Tsukishima or if it would be rude to just walk away from Akiteru. The decision is made for him when Akiteru speaks.

“Hey, Yamaguchi,” he says, taking a step towards him. “You like stationary? Of course you do, come with me,” he answers his own question before Tadashi gets a chance to speak.

Tadashi opens and closes his mouth like a fish, entirely unsure of what’s happening but following Akiteru regardless. They don’t go far, just dip to look at what’s on the stall beside them. Despite what Akiteru assumed, Tadashi isn’t all that interested in the stationary sets that line the table, but he looks out of politeness.

“So you and Kei are pretty close, huh?” Akiteru says, and Tadashi is caught off-guard.

“Uh, yeah, I’d say so, at least,” he replies tentatively, glancing over at Akiteru. He doesn’t seem at all interested in the stall displays. Tadashi is starting to think this wasn’t about stationary at all.

“Hmmm,” Akiteru hums, making a show of looking intently at the selection of novelty pens. “Kei’s never had many friends, you know. He’s always been a bit of a loner.” He picks up an eraser shaped like a ladybug, turns it over in his hands a few times before putting it back. “I thought he liked it that way, to be honest. But this Christmas...” He turns back to Tadashi, a soft smile on his face. “I just wanted to thank you for being his friend, Yamaguchi. I don’t think you realise just how much you mean to him.”

Tadashi is awestruck, staring at Akiteru with wide eyes.  _ I don’t think you realise just how much you mean to him. _ Tadashi feels as if time has slowed down.  _ No, _ he wants to say,  _ it’s him who doesn’t realise what he means to me. But I’m trying to show him. I’m trying. _

“I’m really glad I met him,” Tadashi says instead, and hopes that it’s enough.

Akiteru just nods, sending Tadashi one last grin before turning to ask the man running the stall, “How much for the dinosaur pencil sharpener?”

When they rejoin Tsukishima, who had managed to regroup with Tanaka and Saeko at some point, he squints at Tadashi quizzically.

“What did he say to you?” he asks, suspicion clear on his face.

Tadashi feels his face heat up as Tsukishima glares. “Nothing, really.” He tries to sound casual, but he knows Tsukishima probably sees straight through him. “We just looked at stationary.”

Tsukishima’s eyes narrow even further. “Everything that man says is a lie. Believe nothing.”

Laughing, Tadashi nudges Tsukishima with his shoulder. “I won’t, Tsukki,” he promises aloud, but inside he’s praying that Akiteru was right. He can only hope that perhaps he means as much to Tsukishima as Tsukishima does to him. He can only dream that perhaps Tsukishima could fall for him the way he has for Tsukishima.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi friends! it's a little late but here we are!
> 
> thank u as always to andie for betaing this chapter and screaming in my doc, i wuv u <3
> 
> happy reading all!!! xoxo

Akiteru finally leaving is like a weight off Kei’s shoulders. Yamaguchi is there with him to wave them off, his presence at Kei’s side still so welcome after a month apart. It takes a lot for Kei to stop himself from reaching down and tangling his fingers with Yamaguchi’s, but he manages, stuffing his hands into his pockets as Akiteru’s car leaves their line of sight.

“What now, Tsukki?” Yamaguchi asks, bouncing on the balls of his feet.

It’s a good question. _What now?_ Ideally, Kei would like to continue to hang out with Yamaguchi, but is that too much? He decides to try to play it at least a little cool.

“I should probably finish unpacking,” he says, watching for Yamaguchi’s reaction.

Yamaguchi just nods, smiling. “Ah, that’s fair. I should probably get some work done.” He checks his watch. “It’s still pretty early though, maybe we could hang out later?”

Kei loves Yamaguchi for this, loves how he always seems to be braver than Kei and ask for what Kei never can.

He nods, a small smile of his own stretching across his lips. “Yeah, that sounds good.”

“Okay, cool! I’ll text you later then!” Yamaguchi grins, and they go their separate ways back to their dorm buildings.

Kei has never thought of himself as the clingy type, but he’s also never had anyone to cling _to._ But he may have to reconsider his self-perception now, with how much time he wants to spend with Yamaguchi. He watches Yamaguchi go before retreating to his own building, already anxious for when they’ll next speak.

As he reaches the door to his room, he hears the sound of movement from the other side. So Hintata is back already. Kei probably should have expected this, but that doesn’t make the prospect of seeing him any less exhausting. With a sigh, he braces himself, and opens the door.

There is no way he could have prepared himself to see what he opens the door to.

Kei hears a yelp as they scramble to separate, but there’s no mistaking it – Hinata and Kageyama were making out, and on Kei’s bed, no less. Without a second thought, Kei turns on his heel and walks straight back out of the room, swinging the door firmly shut behind him. His phone is in his hand seconds later, his fingers tapping out a frantic text as he walks.

**I’ll be at yours in 2 minutes.**

**Please do not ask me why.**

Yamaguchi answers his door on the first knock, a worried frown creasing his face. As asked of him, he doesn’t ask Kei what’s wrong, just moves aside and lets him into the room. After kicking off his shoes, Kei marches over to Yamaguchi’s bed, where he lies down on his back to stare blankly at the ceiling. Yamaguchi approaches nervously, clearly extremely concerned, and Kei wonders for a moment if he’s being a little dramatic, but the image of Kageyama on top of Hinata flashes in his mind and quickly washes the thought away.

Slowly, so as not to unsettle Kei, Yamaguchi perches on the edge of the bed, hands folded in his lap. “I know you asked me not to ask,” he starts, still frowning down at Kei, “but I’m kind of worried right now.”

Maybe Kei _is_ being dramatic. He certainly doesn’t like to see Yamaguchi so on edge, so he says it, however bad it tastes in his mouth.

“Hinata and Kageyama were...exchanging saliva. On my bed.”

He glances at Yamaguchi’s face in time to watch him cycle through a number of emotions. The first is shock, his eyes wide and jaw slack. Then there’s confusion, with a furrow of his brow and a silent question on his lips. Finally, a smile breaks out on his face, his whole face alight with it, growing until he’s laughing, so hard and so contagious that Kei can’t help but join in.

“Exchanging saliva?” Yamaguchi manages to ask as they start to calm down, but all it does is set them off again, tears collecting in the corners of their eyes and abs aching.

At some point Yamaguchi had draped his body over Kei’s middle, which is where he lies now as they catch their breath. Kei tries not to think of how Yamaguchi’s weight on him is comfortable and right, instead focusing on keeping his breathing even.

“Wow,” Yamaguchi sighs out with a grin. Then he sits up, spinning to face Kei with a smug look on his face. Kei tries not to mourn the loss of contact. “I fucking told you, didn’t I? I _knew_ Kageyama liked him!”

“Yes, oh wise one, you guessed it,” Kei snarks, grinning right back.

“Even though you were no help! _You_ didn’t even know that Hinata was ‘that way inclined’!”

“You’re never going to let that one go, are you?”

“Not a chance, Tsukki,” Yamaguchi beams, and Kei makes a show of huffing and shaking his head, even if his stomach is twisting itself into knots at the sight.

-x-

Kei would say that Hinata and Kageyama becoming an item is a blessing and a curse. The blessing is that when they want to spend time together, Kei gets banished to Yamaguchi’s dorm. He’s still not sure why the idiots always have to be in _his_ room, but having to spend time in Yamaguchi’s is always welcome. There’s even a small collection of his stuff accumulating there; his toothbrush in their ensuite, a spare charger for his phone on Yamaguchi’s desk, even a few pieces of his clothing tucked neatly into Yamaguchi’s drawers.

The curse, of course, is that Kei is forced to see them. Together. And as disgusting as it is, that’s not even the worst part. No, the worst part is definitely that Kei actually envies them. When they hold hands, look at each other with soft, gooey eyes – when they _kiss,_ all Kei can think is that’s what he wants with Yamaguchi. It seems unjust that those simpletons managed to take the leap while Kei finds his feet glued to the ground.

It’s only been a week, and already Kei feels tense whenever Hinata or Kageyama are around. Maybe it’s in his imagination, but he thinks that Yamaguchi has been different too; a little more detached maybe. Kei isn’t too sure what to make of it. He’d hoped that maybe this extra time together would bring them even closer together, but it seems to be doing the opposite. But maybe it’s in his head.

Maybe it just _seems_ like Yamaguchi is pulling away because Kei wants him closer. More than he’s wanted anything, actually. The knowledge that he loves Yamaguchi is so comfortable, fits so cleanly into his existence that maybe it’s just hard to keep it to himself. And Kei has never had that problem before – keeping things to himself is one of Kei’s most honed skills. He supposes maybe all of those songs and stories have a point; love makes people weird.

This theory is proven when, on a rare night where he’s spending it in his own room, Kei decides that maybe Hinata would be a good person to talk to about his dilemma.

“Hinata.”

As usual, Hinata stills, as if a lack of movement would make him invisible to Kei. After a second, he turns from where he had been rooting in his dresser to look at Kei, face set to show a sort of frightened curiosity.

“Yes?”

Kei sighs, choosing to ignore Hinata’s theatrics and get straight to the point. “How did you and Kageyama...you know, get together?” Hinata cocks his head in question, pushing Kei to elaborate, frustrated. “I mean how did you tell him you liked him? And how did you know he felt the same?”

“Oh!” Hinata exclaims. He scratches his head, clearly in thought. “Well we didn’t actually _say_ anything. He came over to say hi when I texted him that I was back, and I was just really excited to see him that I kinda just...kissed him?” He’s smiling sheepishly, cheeks tinged pink as he continues. “And he kissed back and that was it. Till you walked in, I guess. Sorry about your bed,” he adds shyly.

Kei blinks, brain processing the information. Of course that’s how it happened – pure impulse and no thought. “And after that? You must have talked. Is Kageyama your boyfriend?”

Hinata’s face drops. “Well, technically we haven’t talked about it but...I think so? Oh God, Tsukishima, does he know that? Shit, what if he doesn’t want to be my boyfriend? Oh, this is terrible!” Hinata laments as he collapses onto his bed.

Perhaps Kei was giving the two of them too much credit when he’d assumed they actually knew what they were doing here. He should have known that they would have both dove into this head-first without actually having a conversation.

“This is why people tend to talk about these things,” he sighs, and Hinata removes his hands from his face just to shoot a glare at Kei. Rolling his eyes, Kei takes pity on his poor, dense roommate. “It’s not too late. You can still talk to him about it.”

Hinata’s face brightens as he sits up. “You’re right! I’m gonna text him now, see if he wants to come over. You don’t mind going to Yamaguchi’s, right?”

With yet another sigh, Kei stands up from his desk chair. “I suppose not,” he says, but the warmth in his chest says that ‘don’t mind’ is an understatement, to say the least.

He crosses Kageyama in the courtyard, the moment reminiscent of that time months ago, the first time Kei stayed at Yamaguchi’s. They nod as they pass each other, an odd sense of solidarity, and Kei silently wishes him good luck for the conversation he’s about to walk into with Hinata.

But when Yamaguchi opens the door, freckled face bright with a toothy grin, Kei doesn’t care about Kageyama or Hinata or their weird, ambiguous relationship. He just knows that if ever he decides to act on his feelings – and that is a big _if_ – he’s going to do it right. No impulse, no rushed confessions; he’s going to do it _right._


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> eeeeeee so we're a lil late again because life is kicking my Ass hah, but here we are!
> 
> of course thank u andieeeeeee my beta and my love xoxo
> 
> happy reading everyone!! <3

If you’d have told Shouyou a week ago that today he’d be waiting for Kageyama to show up so that Shouyou could ask him to be his boyfriend, well – actually, he wouldn’t be all too surprised.

Because as it turns out, Shouyou quite likes Kageyama, and has for quite some time. It only became clear to him once Kageyama stopped speaking to him. Behind the anger and the hurt had been something different, something a little more difficult to interpret. Shouyou only realised as he was scrolling through Kageyama’s Facebook feed for the umpteenth time, that the feeling was  _ longing. _

Once he’d figured that out, the pieces all fell into place. Kageyama’s call on New Year’s Eve had made his heart feel light and his stomach all fluttery. The consequent video calls were enlightening, Shouyou finding it difficult to keep his eyes off Kageyama. Sure, Shouyou had always known that Kageyama was attractive – annoyingly so, sometimes – but seeing him after finally decoding his own feelings had been quite the ride for Shouyou.

But it had been nothing compared to how overcome he had been when he’d opened his dorm door to find Kageyama standing there, an awkward smile on his disgustingly handsome face. Well, Shouyou hadn’t even allowed himself time to think before he was stretching up onto his tiptoes and wrapping his arms around Kageyama’s neck. And when their lips had smashed together, all energy and excitement, Kageyama hadn’t pulled away.

Shouyou had let go of Kageyama, dropping back onto his heels, and they’d stared at each other for a long moment, both of them out of breath from a single, chaste kiss. There was a second where Shouyou had thought that he’d ruined everything – that Kageyama was about to turn around and leave and never speak to Shouyou again.

That didn’t happen. What did happen, was that Kageyama had charged forward, threaded his fingers through Shouyou’s hair, and kissed him right back. Shouyou gripped Kageyama like he was the only thing keeping him afloat. The kiss quickly deepened, losing restraint until Kageyama was lifting Shouyou, Shouyou wrapping his legs around Kageyama’s middle as he moved them to the closest bed.

He’d dropped Shouyou onto the bed, their mouths separating for only a moment before Kageyama was climbing over him and leaning in once more. Things we’re progressing fast, and Shouyou welcomed it, his brain empty but for the thought  _ ‘oh my God, this is actually happening’. _

But then the door had opened, and a new thought popped into Shouyou’s mind:  _ ‘oh my God, please not Tsukishima’. _ They’d barely managed to pull their faces apart before Tsukishima was turning and leaving again, but that was it; the spell had been broken.

It was kind of as if nothing had happened. Kageyama had cleared his throat, moving from where he had been caging Shouyou beneath his body to stand uncomfortably in the middle of the room. And Shouyou, well, he did the one thing he could think to break the tension.

“Wanna go practice spiking?”

Of course, Kageyama had said yes, and that was that. Things had been mostly normal, except if he reached for Kageyama’s hand, Kageyama would let him hold it. If he leaned up for a kiss, Kageyama would meet him halfway. And if he asked Kageyama to stay at his dorm more often, Kageyama would say yes, and they’d spend a lot of time making out.

It was nice – really nice, actually – until Tsukishima had pointed out that fatal flaw. They hadn’t actually spoken about any of this.

So now Shouyou waits, anxious, for that knock on his door, but resolute. Soon, Kageyama will either be his boyfriend, or he’ll never want to speak to Shouyou again. Or maybe he’ll want to still be friends – Shouyou isn’t sure if this would be better or worse than the ‘never speak again’ option if the ‘boyfriend’ option doesn’t pan out.

A knock on the door stops Shouyou’s thoughts in their tracks, and he leaps up to open the door. Kageyama leans down to brush a kiss to Shouyou’s lips before shuffling past him into the room, unwrapping his scarf and kicking his shoes off as he goes. The ease of it all makes Shouyou momentarily mushy, but he quickly regains himself and returns to the task at hand.

“Kageyama!” he says, probably far too loud in the otherwise quiet room, but he can’t help it – he’s on edge. “We need to talk!”

“Um, okay,” Kageyama responds with a frown.

Shouyou grabs his hand and drags him to sit beside him on his bed. “This past week has been great – like, really, really great – but I think we need to talk about it.”

Kageyama’s frown seems to impossibly deepen. “Are you– What are you trying to say, Hinata?”

_ Okay, Shouyou. It’s showtime. _ “I’m  _ saying  _ that this means something to me. Because I really like you, and I want you to like me too.”

“Of course I like you, idiot! I wouldn’t be with you if I didn’t,” Kageyama barks, but his cheeks are flushed pink.

“Okay, that’s good!” Shouyou exclaims, and he’s beaming now, heart pounding.  _ Say it. _ “So does that mean you’ll be my boyfriend?”

Kageyama tilts his head, the same way that dogs do when they’re confused, and Shouyou thinks that it’s  _ adorable. _ “Well, yeah. Wasn’t I already your boyfriend?”

Shouyou is entirely too happy about the ‘yes’ to care about anything else, diving forward to swing his arms around Kageyama’s neck. “Oh thank  _ God,  _ I was so worried you’d say no!” he practically squeals against Kageyama’s cheek. “Tsukishima made me so worried, I thought that maybe I’d read it all wrong and you didn’t like me like that. I don’t know why, seeing as we hold hands and kiss  _ a lot _ and stuff, but I was just so  _ nervous–” _

“Hinata, what the hell are you talking about?” Kageyama cuts him off, and Shouyou pulls back to look quizzically at him.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that I thought we were already boyfriends? So like, what is all of this about?”

“Well we never actually  _ said  _ we wanted to be together, and when I told Tsukishima that he made this  _ face  _ and it made me think that maybe I’d misinterpreted everything.” He can’t meet Kageyama’s eyes now, heat creeping up his neck at having gotten so worked up for apparently no reason.

“Oh,” Kageyama says, his eyes wide. “I hadn’t thought about that. I guess I just assumed...”

“No, so did I!” Shouyou assures him. “Well, at least we know now. It’s official! You’re my boyfriend,” he grins.

“Yeah,” Kageyama smirks back. “I guess so.”

-x-

Being Kageyama’s boyfriend is kind of awesome. Of course, Shouyou likes the distinctly  _ boyfriend  _ aspects; the kissing, the touching, it’s all great. But the other stuff all seems to have gotten even better, too. When they practice volleyball, they click better than ever. Kageyama is getting better at expressing himself, even if he  _ does  _ still call Shouyou an idiot far more than Shouyou thinks is necessary. Even doing homework together is easier, as if Kageyama’s mere presence makes memorising human anatomy a little less painful.

These are all things that Shouyou tells Yamaguchi now as they sit in the library cafe together. At first, Shouyou had been surprised that Yamaguchi had asked him if he wanted to get coffee together, but Shouyou’s enjoying it. Yamaguchi’s nice, and a really good listener, and Shouyou wonders, not for the first time, why he seems to like Tsukishima so much.

“But, anyway,” Shouyou starts, attempting to change the subject after realising he’s been rambling about Kageyama for probably longer than socially acceptable. “How’ve you been, Yamaguchi?”

Yamaguchi’s eyes widen minutely as he takes a sip of his drink, and Shouyou could swear there’s a hint of pink behind his freckles as he places the cup down.

“Yeah, I’ve been good,” Yamaguchi replies, avoiding eye contact. There’s a pause, but Shouyou stays silent as he watches Yamaguchi fidget. He clearly has something he wants to say, so Shouyou waits patiently til he’s ready to say it. “Hinata?” he finally says, cheeks seeming to darken.

“Mhm?” Shouyou hums around the lip of his cup.

“If I tell you something do you promise not to tell Tsukki?”

Well  _ that  _ takes Shouyou by surprise. He nods enthusiastically, wondering what Tsukishima’s closest friend could possibly want to hide from him.

“Okay,” Yamaguchi sighs, looking like he’s preparing himself to say something big. Shouyou leans in unconsciously, eager to hear what it will be. “I like Tsukki. A lot. So much that I think that actually I might be in love with him.” He rushes the whole thing out and then seems to hold his breath, face now strawberry red.

Shouyou only has time to blink owlishly before Yamaguchi is speaking again.

“I just needed to tell someone and I thought maybe you were the best choice here because I  _ can’t  _ tell Tsukki even though I  _ really  _ want to. Do you think that’s dumb? I just don’t know what to do, Hinata,” he groans, dropping his face to the table till his forehead clunks against the wood.

This time it doesn’t look like Yamaguchi’s going to start speaking again, so Shouyou considers what he’s just learned. It actually makes a lot of sense; Tsukishima is a good-looking guy, if you ignore his personality. And Yamaguchi actually seems to  _ like  _ his personality for whatever reason, so if anyone was going to fall for Tsukishima, it would be Yamaguchi.

And if Shouyou actually thinks about it, Tsukishima obviously really likes Yamaguchi. It all adds up – the way only Yamaguchi can call him ‘Tsukki’, the way Tsukishima never complains about the forced sleepovers, the movie nights,  _ the birthday party.  _ And then the way he’d asked Shouyou about how he and Kageyama got together. As the pieces fall into place, Shouyou can’t believe he never noticed it before. Maybe he was too preoccupied with his own stuff, but now he sees it he can’t ignore it.

“Yamaguchi!” he says, entirely too loud, and Yamaguchi shoots up from the table to stare at him wide-eyed. “You should tell him!”

Yamaguchi is shaking his head before Shouyou even finishes the sentence. “I can’t, Hinata. He’s my best friend, I  _ can’t.” _ He hides his face in his hands with another groan, slumping in his seat.

Shouyou is practically vibrating. Yamaguchi doesn’t even realise how much Tsukishima cares about him and it’s  _ ridiculous.  _ “Yamaguchi,  _ trust  _ me,” he pleads. “You should tell him. At least think about it?”

Peeking through his fingers to see Shouyou’s excited grin, Yamaguchi sighs, letting his hands fall into his lap. “I’ll think about it,” he concedes.

With a pleased nod, Shouyou picks up his drink for another sip, still beaming. He really can’t wait to tell Kageyama about all of this – because he can’t be expected to keep secrets from his  _ boyfriend. _


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HERE IT IS!! DOUBLE UPDATE!!!!!!
> 
> Thank you, AS ALWAYS, to my Andie for being the best beta there is – I Adore You <3
> 
> And happy reading!!!! xoxo

Hinata’s words rattle around Tadashi’s head for days on end following their talk. But it’s a ridiculous suggestion – Tadashi can’t just  _ tell  _ Tsukishima. Even if sometimes it feels as if he might feel the same way. Even if Tsukishima sometimes sits closer than necessary, and watches Tadashi when he thinks Tadashi isn’t looking, and offers Tadashi smiles that no one else gets to see. He still can’t, because Tsukishima is the best friend he has ever had.

And how ironic, really, when Tadashi had vowed that this year he would take risks, be brave, and have no regrets. But he still hasn’t figured out what he’d regret more; telling Tsukishima and possibly destroying their friendship, or staying silent and never knowing what could’ve been. So until he’s come to a conclusion, he simply cannot tell him, no matter what Hinata might say on the matter.

The semester starts back up, and Tadashi falls back into an easy rhythm with Tsukishima, splitting their time together between the library and Tadashi’s room. There are still those moments where Tadashi feels Tsukishima’s eyes on him, sees that soft smile and just wants to scream, to let all of his feelings spill out of him like ink onto a page, but he doesn’t. He just looks up, catches those golden eyes with his brown and smiles back, only hoping that it’s enough.

They’re in the library, working in companionable silence when Tadashi’s phone buzzes against the desk. The screen lights up, showing that the texts are from Hinata.

**yamaaaaa!!!**

**kenma’s bf is throwing a party!!!!**

**this weekend – u better come!!**

Tadashi stares at the text for a while, trying for the life of him to remember who Kenma – never mind his boyfriend – might be. Another text pops up on the screen while he’s wracking his brain.

**it wld be the perfect place to ask out grumpyshima!!**

He feels his face heat up at that. Hinata has been insistent, but Tadashi is at least glad he’s never actually pushed Tadashi out of his comfort zone. Tsukishima looks up from his laptop, expression quizzical at what might have distracted Tadashi from his own work. Clearing his throat awkwardly, Tadashi sets his phone back onto the table.

“So there’s a party this weekend,” he says, attempting to sound casual.

Tsukishima quirks an eyebrow. “Whose?”

“I don’t actually know,” Tadashi chuckles sheepishly, running a hand through his bangs. “I’ll have to ask Hinata. Could be fun though.”

“Why am I not surprised that you speak to my roommate more than I do?”

Tadashi laughs lightly in response, offering a shrug before turning his eyes back to his laptop. There’s a long pause before Tsukishima speaks again.

“I suppose it could be fun.”

Tadashi can’t help but smile, eyes returning to Tsukishima to find his lips quirked subtly. “Yeah. I’ll get the details from Hinata.”

Tsukishima nods, refocusing on his laptop. “Cool,” he replies, still smiling softly.

Fleetingly Tadashi wonders if maybe Hinata might be onto something with his enthusiastic encouragement, but he pushes it down just as quickly. He _ can’t. _ At least, not yet.

-x-

The party is at the same house as the one they went to all those months ago – the one that allowed Tadashi to meet Tsukishima. This time they arrive together, Hinata and Kageyama in tow, and Kenma’s boyfriend – Kuroo, Hinata had reminded him – opens the door to let them in.

The house seems just as crowded as it had been the last time, if not more so. Tadashi even recognises some of the faces this time around, people he’s seen around campus now milling around, drinks in hands and laughter in the air. The four of them make their way through to the kitchen, music thumping around them.

When Tadashi reaches the drinks counter, he can’t help but laugh, prompting Tsukishima to hum in question as he stops beside him.

“No Kahlua, Tsukki,” Tadashi chuckles.

Tsukishima makes a  _ ‘tsk’ _ sound and shakes his head, though he’s smiling too. “I suppose rum will have to do.”

Tadashi grins. “But you hate rum,” he says, nudging Tsukishima with his shoulder.

“Hmm, so I do,” is Tsukishima’s response, but he’s already pouring himself a drink.

With a soft laugh, Tadashi sets about making his own drink. Further down the counter, he can hear Kageyama loudly berating Hinata for making his own drink too strong, but Hinata is defiant, adamant that he can hold his liquour. Tadashi snorts to himself, topping his vodka off with coke before turning back to Tsukishima.

“Barely here two minutes and those two are already making a scene,” he chuckles, and Tsukishima just shakes his head.

“We are absolutely ditching them the first chance we get.”

Tadashi’s grin widens unbidden, his heart thumping dully in his chest at the thought that Tsukishima might want to be alone with him. “You’re so mean, Tsukki,” he scolds airily, but then glances back to where the couple are still arguing, oblivious to the world around them. “You know, I don’t think they’d notice if we left now,” he says, quirking an eyebrow slyly.

Tsukishima smirks. “And to think, I always thought you were the nice one out of the two of us.”

Shrugging nonchalantly, Tadashi begins to move away from the counter. “And I always thought you were the smart one. Funny how wrong people can be, isn’t it?”

Tsukishima laughs that quiet sigh of a laugh that makes Tadashi’s stomach twist, picking up his drink and following Tadashi. “Very funny indeed.”

-x-

After their stealthy escape from their bickering roommates, Tadashi and Tsukishima end up settling in a corner of the darkened living room, leaning against the walls and standing close so as to hear each other over the music. And maybe Tadashi leans in closer than necessary, emboldened by his third drink and enjoying the feel of Tsukishima’s breath against his cheek. The fact that Tsukishima doesn’t pull away, maybe even leans in just as close, makes Tadashi’s skin tingle.

He couldn’t even tell you what they talk about, just joking and laughing, no one else present in their little world. That is, until, a voice cuts through the music, startling Tadashi to silence.

“Tsukki!”

Tadashi feels his eyes widen – just  _ who  _ is using that nickname? He whips his head around to see who would dare, but he finds himself having to tilt his head back to see the face of the brave newcomer. His hair is a mess of blond, the front strands dark and spiked, and his smile is bright, if a little smug. Unconsciously, Tadashi feels himself frown.

Beside him, Tsukishima sighs. “Koganegawa, I’ve told you to stop calling me that.”

Letting out a soft breath, Tadashi’s face smooths out a little. He knows he shouldn’t get jealous just because someone else happens to want to talk to Tsukishima, but his head and his heart seem to be on entirely different wavelengths regarding the issue.

Koganegawa just laughs in response, striding towards them and breaching their corner in earnest. “You’re the last person I’d expect to see at a party, Tsukki!” he says loudly, completely ignoring Tsukishima’s request, as is apparently the norm. “You out with your boyfriend?”

Tadashi’s heart leaps into his throat.  _ Boyfriend? _ Is that what they look like right now, huddled close in their dark little corner, the rest of the world shut out as they see only each other? The thought simultaneously excites and devastates him. To have the world think that he and Tsukishima are together is thrilling, but to have it not be true is a kick in the gut.

Tsukishima’s mouth is a hard line as he stares down an oblivious Koganegawa. There’s a pause, before he sighs once more. “Don’t you have someone else you can bother?” he asks, tone exasperated.

“Oh!” Koganegawa exclaims, a lightbulb practically coming to life above his head. “Is Hinata here with you? I gotta go find him and say hi! Later, Tsukki!”

And then he’s gone, blond head visible atop the crowd as he weaves his way through in search of Hinata. Tsukishima pinches the bridge of his nose, taking a large swig of his drink and wincing at the taste. He levels Tadashi with an apologetic expression, opening his mouth to speak, but Tadashi does before he has the chance.

“Why didn’t you tell him I wasn’t your boyfriend?” he blurts out, unable to stop himself from voicing the only thought left in his head.

Tsukishima’s jaw goes slack around his unspoken words, before he snaps it shut again and pushes his glasses up his nose. “I just didn’t think it was his business. He’s Hinata’s friend from the volleyball team, I don’t even know him that well.” Tsukishima seems to be scrambling slightly, but then he pauses, letting his hand fall and looking Tadashi in the eye. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have let him assume.”

Maybe it’s the alcohol, or maybe it’s just wishful thinking, but Tadashi could swear that Tsukishima almost sounds disappointed. And Tadashi will probably blame the alcohol for his reckless, impulsive response, too.

“I like that he assumed.”

This time it’s Tsukishima’s eyes that go wide, jaw falling once more. “What?” he stutters, colour darkening his cheeks a dusty pink.

Tadashi can feel his own face reddening now, but he’s already said too much – may as well just spit it out. “I like that he called me your boyfriend. I... _ want _ to be your boyfriend.”

Tsukishima blinks for a few seconds, and Tadashi can practically see the wheels turning in his head. Suddenly everything feels too close, the room too small and with too many people in it but not enough air.  _ Oh God, _ what has he just done? He’s always said that you regret the things you  _ don’t _ do but this,  _ this  _ – oh  _ God. _

“I– Sorry, Tsukki, I gotta go,” he mumbles out before he’s pushing through the crowds gasping for air by the time he stumbles out of the glass double doors that lead to the back yard.

It’s almost worse out here, with the memory of their first night together, tipsy and nervous as they’d gazed at the stars and whispered to each other in the cold, autumn air. It’s colder now, the tail-end of winter leaving a frost over the brick ground of the small garden and making Tadashi’s breaths come out in cloudy puffs. He shivers slightly, downing the rest of the drink that he’d forgotten he was even holding and placing the plastic cup on the ground.

Tipping his head back, he stares at the stars, willing his breathing to even out and his eyes to stop watering. If he ever makes it out of here alive, he’s going to  _ kill  _ Hinata. He hears the sound of the doors opening and closing and quickly swipes at his eyes, sniffing roughly and running his hand through his bangs. He absently notes how long his hair has gotten, and is thankful for the way it falls over his eyes and hopefully obscures their dampness.

“Yamaguchi,” Tsukishima’s voice comes from by the door.

With one last deep breath, Tadashi turns around, a smile plastered on his face, ready to take the consequences of his stupid, drunken, impulsive actions. Yeah, he thinks he’s going to regret this.


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THIS IS A DOUBLE UPDATE SO MAKE SURE YOU'VE READ 21 FIRST!!!!!!!!!
> 
> Enjoy~~~

Kei stands by the glass doors, eyes fixed on Yamaguchi’s back. He can barely breathe, the weight of Yamaguchi’s words resting on his chest like a stack of bricks. Had he meant it, or was he just buzzed and saying stupid things? Kei watches as his shoulders steadily rise and fall, his face to the sky – like he’s lost in the stars, where he belongs.

“Yamaguchi,” Kei says softly, not wanting to startle him. He sees Yamaguchi’s shoulders stiffen for a second, before he turns to face Kei.

He’s wearing a wobbly smile, his hair shielding his eyes. “Sorry, Tsukki,” he says, his voice full of forced lightness. “Just ignore me, I was being silly.”

Kei’s brow creases into a frown. He doesn’t  _ want  _ to ignore it; he wants it to be  _ true. _

“Did you mean it?” he asks, taking a step closer to Yamaguchi.

The fake smile falls from his face, his lips shaking slightly. “Don’t, Tsukki.” His voice is small, and Kei feels his heart squeeze. He didn’t want it to be like this.

For all his planning and meticulous analysis, Kei never thought that this would be how he’d end up finally telling Yamaguchi how he feels. He’d never imagined that Yamaguchi would be fighting tears, or that both of them would be more than a little tipsy in the tiny brick garden where they first met. He takes another step towards Yamaguchi, who is looking determinedly at the ground.

“Because I want you to be my boyfriend, too.”

Yamaguchi’s head shoots up, his eyes big and watery. “What?” he breathes. Kei takes another step.

“I didn’t want it to be like this,” Kei says, still frowning. “I wanted to tell you properly.”

“Tsukki,” Yamaguchi says, and it sounds like a warning. This time Yamaguchi takes a step forward, now looking up at Kei with barely any space between them. “Did  _ you  _ mean it?” He’s frowning now, face set hard with determination.

Kei can’t help but laugh, which only serves to make Yamaguchi frown harder. “I meant it. I  _ mean  _ it. I–” He pauses, closing his eyes and sighing softly. “I’ve never felt this way about anyone, Yamaguchi.”

Yamaguchi’s face goes blank. Kei resists the urge to brush his hair from his face, to sweep his thumbs across the freckles that line the bridge of his nose. He simply waits, hoping that when Yamaguchi speaks that he will tell Kei that he feels the same.

“You mean it,” Yamaguchi repeats, almost to himself, in disbelief. Kei nods, unconsciously leaning closer.

They’re both silent for a moment, eyes locked, breath rising in grey wisps as music blares in the house beside them. It’s Yamaguchi who breaks the silence.

“Can I kiss you, Tsukki?” he asks, his voice a quiet whisper in the chilly, January air.

Kei can only nod once more, dipping his head to meet Yamaguchi halfway. His eyes slip shut as their lips touch, soft and chaste and sending sparks across Kei’s skin. He is so in love with this boy, so enamoured with him in a way that he has never been with anyone before, and maybe this isn’t how he’d planned it but  _ God, _ if he had the choice now he wouldn’t have it any other way.

He brings up his hands to cup Yamaguchi’s face, his long fingers sliding to rest in his soft, fluffy hair. Yamaguchi rests his hands either side of Kei’s neck, thumbs stroking soft arches and sending goosebumps across Kei’s already chilled skin.

All too soon Yamaguchi is pulling away, dropping back from his tiptoes onto his heels and staring up at Kei as if he hung the stars. Kei wonders if he’s looking at Yamaguchi the same way. He hopes so; for the first time in his life, he hopes that his emotions are written all over his face, that Yamaguchi can  _ see  _ just how much he means to Kei.

“I’ve wanted to do that since the first night we were here,” Yamaguchi confesses, a shy smile curving his lips.

Kei grins, laughter rumbling in his chest and falling freely from his lips. Yamaguchi’s smile grows as he watches Kei, laughing back breathlessly.

“What?” he asks. “I had a crush on you as soon as I saw you. You’re very attractive, you know.”

Kei’s laughter grows louder, and he drops his hands from Yamaguchi’s face to wrap them around his waist, pulling him close and stooping to bury his face in the crook of Yamaguchi’s neck.

_ “Tsukki,” _ Yamaguchi giggles as Kei laughs against his skin, linking his arms around Kei’s neck to hold him close.

They stay there for a minute, just laughing and holding each other so tightly, and Kei is unable to wipe the smile from his face. Yamaguchi’s skin smells of lemongrass and it’s warm and soft against Kei’s parted lips and Kei would be happy to stay this way forever, wrapped in Yamaguchi’s arms under a light-polluted night sky in the shabby brick yard where it all started.

But Yamaguchi pulls back slightly to try and look at Kei. “Come on, Tsukki,” he says. “It’s freezing out here. Let’s go back inside.”

He’s grinning when Kei finally pulls away to look back at him, and he holds out a hand for Kei to take before turning to open the door. Kei follows dutifully, hand warm in Yamaguchi’s, smile still glued to his face.

-x-

They stop by the drinks counter to top up their cups, but end up back in their quiet little corner, this time even closer than before. Not much has changed; they still joke and laugh and look at each other like there’s no one else in the room, only now nothing’s stopping Kei from reaching out to tuck a stray lock of hair behind Yamaguchi’s ear. And when Yamaguchi reaches down to tangle his fingers with Kei’s, still speaking as if nothing is out of the ordinary, Kei’s smile only widens.

He still hates rum, and he thinks that maybe parties aren’t his thing, but as he stands here with Yamaguchi in their own little world, he knows for a fact that there’s no place he’d rather be.

He’s so happy, so engrossed in whatever Yamaguchi is rambling about that he doesn’t notice the short, orange nuisance that sways towards them.

“Yama!” Hinata slurs loudly, effectively popping their bubble and setting Kei’s teeth on edge.

“Oh!” Yamaguchi exclaims in response, letting go of Kei’s hand to grab Hinata’s arm in an attempt to keep him steady. “Hey there, Hinata,” he says, leaning back to take in the state of him. Kei would label said state somewhere close to dire. “Where’s Kageyama?” Yamaguchi asks, tone full of concern.

“Hmm?” Hinata hums, eyes unfocused. “Oh! He’s gettin’ me some water,” he grins. “He told me to stay put, but then I saw you guys so I came to say hi.”

Kei is, in that moment, very thankful that Kageyama has become the designated Hinata-wrangler. Not only does it mean Kei doesn’t have to – not that he ever  _ did, _ or even  _ would _ – but also that Kageyama will probably want to stay with Hinata in Kei’s room tonight. Which means that Kei will get to go home with Yamaguchi. It sends a tingle up his spine, the thought of being alone with Yamaguchi, of kissing him sweetly and maybe even holding him as they sleep. Kei has to stop imagining there, afraid that the blush climbing up his neck will give him away.

“Hey, were you guys just holding hands?” Hinata asks with a frown, pointing down to where Kei’s hand still hangs at his side, the heat from Yamaguchi’s hand rapidly dispersing – much to Kei’s great disappointment.

Yamaguchi turns to look at Kei, a blush of his own colouring his freckled cheeks, biting his lip sheepishly. Kei is struck speechless at the sight, and he’s frozen in place as Yamaguchi turns back to Hinata and nods.

A grin breaks out on Hinata’s face and he grips Yamaguchi’s arm. “You did it!” he all but yells. “You told him you love him!”

Kei sees Yamaguchi’s body tense, and he lets out a nervous laugh as he looks back over his shoulder at Kei. His eyes are wide, skin so red he looks almost like a strawberry. Kei is still motionless, watching the scene unfold as if outside of his body. So Hinata knew? Well,  _ that’s _ a surprise. And  _ love? _ This is all a lot for Kei to take in.

Yamaguchi turns back to Hinata. “Um, not quite,” he chuckles awkwardly. Hinata’s face drops, and he looks rapidly between the two of them for a moment.

“Hinata, you idiot, I told you to stay put!” comes Kageyama’s annoyed bark as he approaches the group holding a plastic cup filled with what Kei can only hope is water.

None of them respond, the three of them eyeing each other uncomfortably while Kageyama just blinks on in confusion.

“What’s wrong with all of you?” he asks, squinting slightly.

Hinata lets go of Yamaguchi to instead hold onto Kageyama’s arm, reaching up to stage-whisper in his ear. “I just accidentally told Tsukishima that Yamaguchi is in love with him. It’s  _ really  _ awkward.”

Kageyama groans, dragging his free hand down his face and handing the cup of water to Hinata, who takes it gratefully and takes a long drink.

“I’m gonna take him home,” Kageyama says with a scowl. Then he looks straight at Kei. “You’re probably better off staying with Yamaguchi if you don’t wanna deal with this drunk dumbass all night.”

Kei just nods curtly, and Kageyama takes Hinata by the hand.

“Let’s go, moron,” he sighs, but there’s an undeniable fondness in his voice. He leads him a few steps away before shooting them a stilted “bye” over his shoulder.

There’s a long silence in their absence, neither Kei nor Yamaguchi daring to speak lest they be forced to discuss what Hinata had just revealed. Yamaguchi wraps both hands around his drink, cheeks still red as he clears his throat.

“So Hinata already knew that I...like you,” he admits as he stares into the cup.

Kei hesitates for a moment, trying to think of what best to say to avoid adding to Yamaguchi’s obvious embarrassment. “I’m surprised he managed to keep it a secret for this long,” is what he settles on.

Yamachuchi huffs out a laugh, looking up at Kei through his hair. Kei smiles, taking a step closer to him and brushing the long strands back from his face.

“Do you want another drink?” Kei asks, tone casual in an attempt to tell Yamaguchi that  _ everything’s okay  _ and  _ nothing has changed. _

_ “God _ yes,” Yamaguchi replies, downing his drink and grabbing Kei’s hand.

Kei lets Yamaguchi lead him back towards the kitchen. Of course, his heart is still beating uneven rhythms in his chest at what Hinata had said.  _ Love.  _ He’d said Yamaguchi was  _ in love _ with Kei. And Kei is ecstatic, absolutely delirious at the thought that it could be true, but he can wait. He can wait as long as it takes for Yamaguchi to tell him himself. Who knows; Kei might even beat him to it.


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the delay on this, friends, it's been A Week!!! it's a shorter chapter (sorry lol) but i hope you enjoy anyway!!!!  
> thank you as always to my andie for betaing, love u beb <3  
> happy reading!!!

Maybe he’s had too much to drink, or maybe he’s still high on the feeling of Tsukishima’s hand in his, but Tadashi cannot stop giggling. They stumble through the door to Tadashi’s dorm, hand in hand, and fumble in the dark to kick off their shoes.

“Tsukki! Get the light!” Tadashi whisper-shouts as he feels along the walls to find his way to the bathroom.

“You don’t have to whisper, Yamaguchi,” Tsukishima chuckles, his voice not betraying a hint of the inebriation that Tadashi is  _ sure  _ he must be feeling.

The light finally flickers on, to which Tadashi exclaims an “aha!” and wobbles into the bathroom, kicking the door closed behind him. The light in here is far too bright as he clicks it on, and he squints into the mirror, blinking until his eyes adjust. He can see himself swaying, which makes him giggle again. Yes, he’s definitely more than a little drunk, but he doesn’t mind. After all, tonight he was  _ celebrating. _

Slowly, and a little unsteadily, he gets himself ready for bed. He has no idea what time it is, but he is positive that it is late – or, early, to be more accurate. When he exits the bathroom, teeth brushed and face washed, he finds Tsukishima sitting upright on his bed, pajamas in hand. When he sees Tadashi, he shoots up, swaying ever so slightly as he reaches his full height.

“Were you–”

“Oh! I was just–”

There’s a tense moment, Tsukishima clutching at the clothes in his hands while Tadashi awkwardly rubs the back of his neck.

“Sorry,” Tadashi starts again. “Were you waiting to use the bathroom?”

“Um, yes,” Tsukishima replies, oddly stilted. “Are you done in there?”

Tadashi just nods, quirking an eyebrow slightly. Tsukishima says nothing as he brushes by him to the bathroom, closing the door quietly behind him. Alone in the room, Tadashi frowns slightly. Things had all been going so smoothly, and had felt so natural at the party, but it’s as if that feeling is forgotten now, replaced by this vague sort of  _ distance  _ between them.

He changes quickly into his own pajamas while he waits for Tsukishima to emerge, a little on edge at what the atmosphere is going to be like for the rest of the night. Ever the overthinker, he wracks his brain for what he could have done in the past few minutes that might have contributed to the weird tension. Before he has too much time to get himself worked up, the bathroom door opens and Tsukishima steps out, but he doesn’t come any closer, instead hovering awkwardly by the door.

“Are you okay, Tsukki?” Tadashi hears himself ask, voice small even to his own ears. He sees Tsukishima gulp, hands wringing in front of him.

“Mhm,” Tsukishima nods, but he doesn’t move.

“Tsukki?” Tadashi repeats, somehow quieter than before. He knows that Tsukishima heard, though, with the way that he jolts.

“I’m nervous,” Tsukishima blurts, and Tadashi is taken aback by how uncharacteristic the action is.

“What?” he breathes, eyes trained on Tsukishima’s.

Tsukishima continues to pull at his hands. “I’ve never had a boyfriend,” he admits. “I’m afraid of doing this wrong.”

Tadashi’s face softens, and he pads across the room to take Tsukishima’s hand. “You’re not doing anything wrong, Tsukki,” Tadashi assures him. “Tonight has been amazing. Nothing has to change, really.” He steps a little closer, taking Tsukishima’s other hand, too. “Except I want to kiss you. And I thought we could– well, only if you want to, I mean,” he rushes, Tsukishima watching him intently. He takes a deep breath. “I thought we could sleep in the same bed.”

Tsukishima’s face instantly reddens, eyes widening.

“Only if you want to, though,” Tadashi scrambles. “I don’t want to push you or anything, I just thought–”

“I want to,” Tsukishima says, cutting Tadashi off. They stare at each other for a moment, Tadashi sure that his face mirrors Tsukishima’s in colour.

Tadashi swallows heavily. “Okay,” he nods, and when Tsukishima nods back, Tadashi lets go of one hand to lead him to the bed.

The room seems dead silent as Tadashi draws the covers back, sliding into the bed and shuffling close to the wall. Holding the sheet up, he looks expectantly at Tsukishima. After a short pause, Tsukishima takes off his glasses and gets in beside him, moving down the bed until they lie face to face. Then Tadashi reaches up to press the light switch above the headboard, plunging them into darkness.

Tadashi’s heart is pounding, the room so still that he’s sure that Tsukishima can hear. The only other sound is that of their breathing, the fresh scent of mint present as Tsukishima’s breath tickles Tadashi’s cheeks. Tentatively Tadashi brings up his hand to rest gently against Tsukishima’s jaw.

“Is it okay if I kiss you, Tsukki?” he whispers into the quiet.

“Please,” Tsukishima sighs, so Tadashi does.

It’s sweet, soft like their first, as Tsukishima snakes his arm around Tadashi’s waist and pulls him closer. Tadashi slips his hand around the back of Tsukishima’s neck, the skin smooth and warm under his fingers. He presses forward, slowly so as to give Tsukishima time to pull away if he wants to, but Tsukishima only presses back, deepening the kiss as naturally as breathing. Tadashi feels weightless as Tsukishima’s lips move against his, holding on to Tsukishima like a tether.

They pull away breathless, a smile tugging at Tadashi’s lips. Everything still feels like a dream, probably due, in part, to the alcohol still running through his system. But Tsukishima is here, in Tadashi’s bed, his arm around Tadashi’s waist and his taste on Tadashi’s lips.

“Next time,” Tsukishima pants, “don’t ask.”

And Tadashi can’t help it – he giggles, pure joy spilling from his mouth. Tsukishima tenses for a second, before sighing out a laugh, turning to hide his face in the pillow. Still laughing, Tadashi shuffles closer, pressing a kiss to the exposed sliver of Tsukishima’s cheek.

When Tsukishima turns back, he’s grinning; Tadashi can barely see in the darkness, but he can tell. Tadashi smiles too as he places another kiss on Tsukishima’s nose, then another at the corner of his mouth, giggling all the while.

They lie like that for a while, whispering and giggling and kissing, until finally sleep takes them both under. But Tadashi is so content, drifting off with Tsukishima’s arms around him. This isn’t a dream; it’s better, and he can’t wait to wake up.

-x-

Blinking his eyes open blearily, Tadashi slowly adjusts to consciousness. Tsukishima’s chest rises and falls under his splayed hand, their legs tangled under the sheets of Tadashi’s twin bed. A smile pulls at Tadashi’s lips, drowsy and sleep-drunk, at the slightly hazy memory of last night.

Light is filtering in through the haphazardly drawn curtains, illuminating the room enough to make Tadashi squint. He scrunches his eyes shut, turning slowly to settle back into the warmth he and Tsukishima have created. He doesn’t even care what time it is – not that they have anywhere to be today anyway. As he shuffles closer, Tsukishima’s eyes flutter open, mouth murmuring something unintelligible.

“Shh,” Tadashi whispers. “Go back to sleep.”

“Okay, Tadashi,” Tsukishima mumbles, pressing his face into the crook of Tadashi’s neck.

His breathing evens again soon after, but Tadashi feels wide awake, giddy at hearing his given name fall from Tsukishima’s lips. It’s somehow even better than his voice had been thick with sleep; so intimate, Tadashi thinks. After a while, his heart rate slows and his eyes droop and Tadashi drifts back to sleep, a smile resting comfortably on his face.

-x-

Being Tsukishima’s boyfriend is easy. Just like Tadashi had said, nothing really changes. They still spend a lot of time in the library, settled in a comfortable silence as Tsukishima taps away at his computer keys and Tadashi tackles whatever new program he’s been forced to learn this week. They still watch documentaries at Tadashi’s on Thursday nights, fries on their laps and milkshakes in hand. They still laugh at whatever antics Hinata and Kageyama have gotten up to this week, clutching at their sides and lamenting their friends’ idiocy.

Only now when Tadashi reaches a hand under the library desk, Tsukishima will tangle their fingers together as he continues to type dexterously with one hand. Now they press close on Tadashi’s bed as they watch, and Tsukishima kisses the salt from Tadashi’s lips as the laptop screen before them presents them with the secrets of the universe. Now, their laughter melts into contented sighs, into gentle hands that run through soft hair and feather-light kisses pressed to every freckle.

And Tadashi knows more and more every day that this is it. This is what they write songs about, the stuff that people search their whole lives for, and he doesn’t care a single bit how cheesy it is. Because it’s right. He loves Tsukishima, like he’s known he has for some time. They fit so comfortably together; like the moon and the stars, like fries and milkshake, like Tadashi’s lips against soft, pale skin. Tadashi only hopes he can work up the courage to tell him so before the semester ends and summer comes. He knows it’s okay if he doesn’t though; they have time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so we're coming to the end of our story here, but it's not over just yet! there's still a few more chapters to come, i promise!!! thank u for readinggggg xoxo


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> u guys. thank u so much for ur patience with this chapter. i love u all so dearly ToT
> 
> thank you to my andie for betaing, absolute angel as per <3
> 
> happy reading friends xoxo

Hinata snores when he’s drunk. He snores when he isn’t drunk too, but it’s in that soft way that Tobio finds kind of cute. What isn’t cute is the foghorn sound Hinata is making right now, when the sun has barely risen and Tobio has had a grand total of 41 minutes of sleep. No matter how _handsy_ the drink had made Hinata, Tobio doesn’t think it was worth it; not now that he knows his alarm is probably going to go off soon and he’s going to have to face the gym feeling like one of those gym socks stuffed under Hinata’s bed. All while Hinata continues to snore blissfully, only to likely wake up hangover-free once Tobio returns. There really is no justice in this world.

Still, Tobio can’t deny that his boyfriend does look the picture of innocence right now, the first light of day creeping through the windows and setting his resting features aglow. Tobio even smiles softly as drool starts to fall from Hinata’s wide open mouth. _God, what an idiot._ He’s Tobio’s idiot, though.

Taking care not to wake him – though it’d probably take two earthquakes and a hurricane to wake Hinata in this state – Tobio slides out of bed. If he’s not going to sleep, he may as well get to the gym early. He picks his phone up to disable the alarm, and decides he should probably text Yamaguchi and apologise. After all, things had looked pretty awkward when Tobio had finally managed to track down Hinata – he only hopes that the dumbass hadn’t done too much damage. If someone had outed _his_ feelings like that...well, Tobio’s just not going to think about that.

**Really sorry about Hinata last night**

He considers the message for a second. Should he elaborate? No, Yamaguchi is probably well aware of what he means. It does feel like maybe Tobio should say a little more though. Hinata had told him, somewhat ineloquently, that it looked like Yamaguchi and Tsukishima had finally been on the right track before he’d opened his big, annoying mouth. He really hopes Hinata didn’t fuck that up for them – Tobio would hate to see Yamaguchi sad because of this.

**I hope things are still okay with Tsukishima**

**Let me know if you want me to punch Hinata for you**

Locking his phone he goes to get ready. Less than ten minutes later he’s closing the door softly behind him, gym bag in hand. Maybe he’ll pick up breakfast for Hinata on the way back. If he says so himself, Tobio is pretty good at this whole ‘boyfriend’ thing.

-x-

Predictably Yamaguchi declines Tobio’s offer to wallop Hinata, instead informing Tobio that things were actually wonderful with Tsukishima and that neither of them needed to worry. Tobio reads these texts as he stands in line at the library cafe waiting for his order. He’s glad; Yamaguchi has obviously liked Tsukishima for a long time. Well, Tobio hadn’t _actually_ noticed before, but in retrospect, it all makes sense.

When he gets back to Hinata’s room, he’s thankful to find that the snoring has stopped, the sound of the shower running on the other side of the bathroom door confirming that Hinata is up. Tobio sets their food down on Hinata’s desk, settling in the chair to wait for Hinata to emerge.

Leaning back, he wonders; how does Yamaguchi _know_ that he loves Tsukishima? Because Tobio knows that he likes Hinata _a lot._ He knows that he’s happy with Hinata, and that spending time with Hinata is _always_ good, even when they argue. And he knows that his heart beats faster when Hinata smiles at him, and when they hold hands – even just _thinking_ about Hinata makes Tobio feel all bubbly inside.

He doesn’t get a chance to think further on it before the bathroom door is bursting open, a dripping Hinata taking a few steps out before he catches sight of Tobio and jumps three feet into the air, clutching at the towel around his hips.

“When the hell did you get back?!” he shrieks accusingly. Tobio can only blink in response before his face falls into a frown.

“Like five minutes ago,” he replies, tone defensive. “Now quit yelling at me, asshole. I brought you breakfast.” He plucks the bag of food off the desk and thrusts it towards Hinata, whose jaw is now slack as he stares at the offering with interested eyes.

“Oh,” he says, cheeks growing red. “Uh, thanks.” A smile starts to spread on his face, and when his eyes meet Tobio’s they’re practically sparkling, his flushed face prompting a matching heat to creep up Tobio’s neck.

Tobio clears his throat roughly, averting his gaze to the ground. “It’s fine. Just go get dressed so we can eat.”

Hinata grins and nods before turning to dig through his dresser drawers. Tobio lets out his breath in a _‘whoosh’,_ letting himself look up and admire Hinata’s bare back as he rummages. He knows from closer inspection that there are light freckles dotted across his shoulders, faded since summer but still visible when you’re close enough to press your lips against them.

Tobio looks away as Hinata drops his towel to pull his clothes onto his still-damp body, turning the chair fully so that his back is to him and willing his face back to a normal colour. In no time at all Hinata’s hand enters Tobio’s line of sight, grabbing the food and bouncing over to the unmade bed.

“Hey, Kageyama!” he calls, mouth somehow already full. “Are you gonna come eat or what?”

With a deep breath, Tobio moves to join Hinata on the bed, opening the bag to take his own food. Hinata chatters away as they eat, not a hint of a hangover about him, just as Tobio had foreseen. It’s comfortable, to spend a Sunday morning eating greasy café food in bed with his boyfriend. Tobio is happy, and that’s enough. He doesn’t have to think himself into a panic wondering whether or not he loves Hinata and how he’ll know when he does. They’re happy, and that’s enough.

-x-

“Do you think Yamaguchi would be able to convince Tsukishima to go on a double date with us?”

Tobio’s scowl deepens as he eyes Hinata suspiciously. Hinata seems oblivious to how ridiculous his question was, stuffing his sweaty towel into his gym bag like nothing is amiss. 

“Why the hell would you want to do that?” Tobio asks, tone maybe a little harsher than necessary. 

Not that Tobio has anything against the idea in theory; he likes Yamaguchi a lot, and Tsukishima is fine, even if they never really have much to talk about. They do have this weird kind of kinship, seeing each other often on the straight route between the two dorms that they frequent. There’s always a nod, sometimes a mumbled “hi”, but they never stop to chat, always far more eager to spend time with their boyfriends than each other.

But in practice, Tobio fears that a double date would end in disaster. He and Hinata have barely even been on a _date_ -date – what makes him think that the best way to do so is _with other people?_ Hinata may be a literal ray of sunshine who can make people like him without even trying, but Tobio is decidedly not.

Hinata straightens, turning to fix Tobio with a curious look. “Does that mean you don’t want to?”

Hinata’s eyebrows are drawn, his lips pulled into that cute little pout that he does when he doesn’t get his way and Tobio is weak. No, he doesn’t want to, but Hinata _does_ and for some reason Tobio feels the constant compulsion to keep this little idiot happy. So he huffs, zipping his own gym bag and hoisting it over his shoulder.

“I didn’t say that,” he replies, and the creases on Hinata’s brow smooth, just as planned. “What do you even _do_ on a double date?”

“Well,” he starts, zipping his own bag haphazardly. He’s smiling now, which is a good sign. “You do something fun!” He slides his bag onto his shoulders and makes to leave the gym changing rooms. Tobio follows, eager to hear anything else his boyfriend has to say on the subject.

“Like, we could go for food,” Hinata continues as they exit the gym and begin the walk back to their dorms. “Or we could go to the movies. Anything you would do on a date, really!”

“But I’ve never _been_ on a date,” Tobio replies, unable to keep the exasperation out of his voice.

“Oh!” Hinata exclaims, and it takes a few seconds for Tobio to realise that Hinata has stopped walking.

Tobio turns to see what’s holding him up and maybe shout at him to hurry up, but he’s struck silent when he sees that Hinata is pouting again. “What’s wrong?”

“You’re right,” Hinata breathes, realisation visibly dawning on him. “We’ve been dating for _months_ now and we’ve never even been on a real date!” Then he points at Tobio, expression turned angry. “Why didn’t you tell me?!”

Tobio sputters in disbelief, eyes wide as he stares at Hinata. “Why was that my job?!” he yells back. “You didn’t even notice!”

“Fine!” Hinata storms to Tobio’s side, grabbing his hand and pulling him roughly in the direction towards the dorms. “We are going on a date. Tonight.”

“What?” Tobio asks as he stumbles to keep up. “We both have classes tomorrow!”

“I don’t care. We’re doing this, Kageyama. Accept it.”

Tobio knows that it’s no use arguing with Hinata when he’s like this. With a sigh, he lets himself be dragged along, and accepts his fate.

Once they’re back at Hinata’s dorm room, he ushers Tobio into the bathroom a fierce look of determination etched onto his features as he orders him to shower. Tobio does as he’s told, knowing better than to argue when Hinata’s like this. He showers quickly, exiting the bathroom to find Hinata digging through the small pile of Tobio’s clothes that he’s pulled from Tobio’s gym bag.

“What are you doing?” Tobio asks hesitantly, rubbing at his hair with a towel while he holds up the one at his hips.

“You can’t wear this on a date,” Hinata huffs, holding up Tobio’s threadbare sweater and old joggers.

“Well, I didn’t know we’d be going on a date when I packed it, did I?” Tobio snarks back. The look Hinata gives him tells him not to push his luck.

“Quit being such an ass, Bakageyama. Do you wanna go on a date or not?” Hinata’s tone is clipped in a way that makes Tobio pause.

No one would call Tobio a perceptive person. He’s not all that good with people, and reading them is something he’s never quite gotten the hang of. But he _knows_ Hinata. He knows that Hinata is never like this unless he’s upset about something, and Hinata being upset – like, _really_ upset – is the worst possible outcome in Tobio’s mind.

He takes a step towards Hinata. “Hinata, what’s this really about?”

Hinata sighs roughly, throwing the clothes back into a pile. “Am I a bad boyfriend?”

Tobio blinks for a second, taken aback. “What? No! Why would you think that?”

“Because I’ve never even taken you on a date! What kind of boyfriend forgets to do something as simple as that?” he wails, flopping back onto his bed dramatically.

Hitching his towel higher on his hips, Tobio moves towards the bed. In an ideal world, he wouldn’t be having this conversation half-naked, but he powers through. “I didn’t take you on a date either. Do you think _I’m_ a bad boyfriend?”

“No!” Hinata rushes, sitting up and staring up at Tobio. “No, you’re a great boyfriend!” Then he sighs, his shoulders sagging. “But don’t you think we should be doing more...boyfriend-y things?”

Tobio cocks his head. “Like what?”

“Well, like dates! And romantic stuff!”

Securing his towel a little tighter, Tobio sits beside Hinata. “But I like what we do now. Why should we change anything?”

Hinata looks at him with wide, searching eyes. “Really?”

Tobio nudges Hinata gently. “Yeah, dumbass. Things are great now.” He feels Hinata settle into his side. “And besides,” Tobio continues, “I think what we do is already romantic.”

“Oh yeah?” Hinata snorts. “All we do is play volleyball. Or watch volleyball. And eat a lot, I guess.”

Tobio grins. “Exactly. It’s perfect, right?”

“Yeah,” Hinata grins back, “I guess it is.”

Seeing the smile back on Hinata’s face settles something in Tobio. It’s like things are right again, comfortable the way things always are with Hinata. Worries quelled, Hinata finally bounces off to take a shower, and Tobio takes the chance to get dressed into his non-date-worthy clothes.

Soon enough both of them are clean and dressed, Hinata’s laptop set up between them to stream the most recent national game, food ordered and on the way. Tobio feels at peace, with Hinata whooping and gasping beside him. He was right; things are great as they are, even if they don’t do the conventional ‘boyfriend-y things’. But when have either of them ever been conventional anyway?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sooooo you may have noticed that next chapter will be our last!!! i really hope to have it out within the next week but take that with a grain of salt bcs Life and Things hfdjks
> 
> i really hope you enjoyed this update and will stick around for our ending!!!! thank you so much for reading, i appreciate all you so much <3 xoxo

**Author's Note:**

> So it's yet another university AU! I really hope you enjoyed reading this and want to see more! Kudos and comments greatly appreciated as always, and come say hi on twitter if you feel like it @burnthisoka xoxo


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